1700.
Even if the rules allow it, Lawful Good deities don't appreciate human sacrifices to them.
1701.
Can't clear out a dungeon by sneaking in and running a generator while they sleep.
1702.
Even if it's historically accurate, can't try to heal someone by cutting them.
1703.
The time machine is not for finding ringers for our baseball team.
1704.
Even if we're playing Werewolf: The Wild West, can't play the Lone Ranger.
1705.
If my boss wakes up to find a young Frank Sinatra won American Idol, no more time machine
for me.
1706.
Before anybody makes a demolitions check, I will raise my hand if my skill is the highest.
1707.
In the middle of a black ops, can't play 'will it bounce' with the penthouse furniture.
1708.
No bringing up the time we were nearly TPK'd by a jerboa.
1709.
Even if its really cool, no throwing dry ice on the water weird.
1710.
Mooning M. Bison is not an appropriate stunt action.
1711.
I will not spend all my starting cash on the stock market.
1712.
Can't take out the villain by just propping a bucket of acid over his door.
1713.
It is not necessary for the villain to say 'Uncle' before I accept his surrender.
1714.
My martial artist has to actually know a martial art.
1715.
Can't just wizard lock the villain's throne room and come back in two weeks after he's
starved to death.
1716.
Summon Para-Legal Elemental is not a real spell.
1717.
The spell Summon Vacuum Elemental is not for household chores.
1718.
I don't have to name everything we discover after myself.
1719.
I can't forge out a new Elven homeland by conquest unless the Elves want a new homeland.
1720.
Contrary to popular opinion, the girdle of masculinity/femininity does have a noticeable
effect on elves. 1721.
The minute the GM figures out my Inquisitor is Lennie Briscoe, he dies.
1722.
No building a Gatling Gatling gun.
1723.
My martial arts style is vetoed if its just thirty different ways to hit a guy in the
jewels. 1724.
No matter how well I make my Animal Wrangling roll, can't saddle break a Los Diablos.
1725.
No god's vestments include gogo boots.
1726.
If I kill more goons with my rifle than the rest of the party without firing a shot, time
to retire the character.
1727.
When facing the classic weight balance trap, can't use the halfling for ballast.
1728.
Can't have a gun that doubles as a jump jet.
1729.
"Large things that hurt badly? is not an appropriate focus.
1730.
No putting all my weapon points in the blowgun. 1731.
If I take the blowgun, I at least have to poison the darts.
1732.
Even if the rules allow it, can't start a Vestenmannavnjar Dixie Land band.
1733.
Dousing a character in beer is acceptable after a victory.
Then setting him on fire is not.
1734.
We aren't continuing the mission until everybody is clear on the term "Going in hardcore"
1735.
"Come here often?" is not what you say when rescuing the princess from the necromancer's
dungeon. 1736.
Can't name my rabbit familiar Watership. 1737.
There is no par on a dragon. 1738.
Even if I write it, can't have my own theme song.
1739.
The rules don't cover laugh tracks.
1740.
If the villain performs a kind act, can't blackmail him with it later.
1741.
Klingons don't have a French accent.
1742.
We aren't relocating the campaign to Texas or Florida for tax reasons.
1743.
No taunting characters about what they lost in the latest errata.
1744.
Can't one shot major villains just because the writers forgot to give them a basic defense.
1745.
Contrary to popular belief, mercenaries don't help divorce proceedings.
1746.
Even if my culture has no spoken language, the campaign will not turn into a game of
charades. 1747.
There was no conspiracy to keep Wales out of 7th Sea.
1748.
Can't target microscopic organisms with spells. 1749.
If my character is a hard drinking, hard partying muslim chick, it's vetoed is she's clearly
my Ex. 1750.
A barbarian is not just a fighter with less feats and more anger management issues.
1751.
Lord Soth just does not need a hug.
1752.
No summoning octopi to make the sleeping paladin explain all the hickies.
1753.
No challenging sleeping people to a duel. 1754.
No hogging all the brute kills.
1755.
Calling my shot means 'Where I want to hit him' not 'Where I want him to land.'
1756.
Despite what the module says, not every woman in this campaign is a closeted lesbian.
1757.
The princess' menstral cycle doesn't factor into her rescue.
1758.
Dr. Suess has no place in an exorcism. 1759.
Doesn't matter what I just killed with it, the howitzer is not going to qualify for holy
relic. 1760.
No risking profit factor to buy groceries. 1761.
Star Destroyers are already baby proofed. 1762.
If my character causes Camelot to look like King Lear he dies.
1763.
If I just rolled the same chart result 8 times in a row, I will lie about the result if I
do it again.
1764.
No spending stunt points to play 'Yoink!
Got your nose!' on a Genlock. 1765.
Even if my CO does it, a unitard is not an appropriate SAS uniform.
1766.
No starting a character with 4 swordsman schools.
1767.
No I can't Google the villain's secret weakness.
1768.
My monk can't convince the bad guys to go streaking with him just so they're easy to
beat up later.
1769.
I can't disarm the monk.
At least not literally.
1770.
I don't have to be faster than the other investigators.
They have to be faster than my bullets.
1771.
If my actions singlehandedly put the Drow on the endangered species list, time to retire
the character.
1772.
No using EHarmony to find a cleric for the party.
1773.
Can't use a wish spell to make the last Star Wars trilogy not suck.
1774.
Battle Mauls can't double as coup sticks.
1775.
Just because I spared the villain's life doesn't mean she owes me a first date.
1776.
They don't make weapon grade schnauzers. 1777.
No using goldfish as improvised weapons just to get the dual weapon bonus.
1778.
I don't have to buy a child seat to take the halfling anywhere.
1779.
Using nuclear weapons in assassinations is just being lazy.
1780.
No using the friendship virtue to start a harem.
1781.
Beatlemania is not an acceptable dementia.
1782.
I will remember we're playing 4th edition and stop using my imagination.
1783.
Distracting the bad guy does not mean with an aztec bar mitzvah.
1784.
Some grizzfarb says I have to stop making up gnomish profanities.
1785.
I can't play an anthropomorphic homo sapiens. 1786.
Albanians do not count as furries. 1787.
I will stop telling people my high elf is just a drow with a bad case of vitiligo.
1788.
Even if it takes an hour before it's my turn again, can't kill time with solitaire.
1789.
Doesn't matter what the map says, can't drive a sports car through the villain's lair.
1790.
Can't find the villain just by casting power word stun in the bar and see who's still standing.
1791.
Can't make the genie's head explode until everybody else has had their wish.
1792.
Let's keep the collateral damage to under a billion dollars.
1793.
A comeliness under 15 doesn't mean I can't be on MTV.
1794.
Can't use party members for ante.
1795.
Not possible to corner the market on weapons they don't have rules for yet.
1796.
The halfling language is not just baby speak.
1797.
Getting the dwarf fixed isn't going to improve his disposition.
1798.
Can't start every game breaking out of jail.
1799.
They don't make healing potions in diet.
1800.
I will not point out any loophole that arouses the powergamer.
1801.
When challenged for rank, can't make the challenge 1970's NBA trivia.
1802.
Leave off the Chaotic Evil alignment on the teaching application.
1803.
Can't convince to party to play Frankie Goes to Hollywood.
Not their music, the actual band.
1804.
The epic villain killing weapon requires a quest to obtain, not $35 at Pruett's Guns
and Ammo. 1805.
I won't mention a celebrity that causes another gamer to go all stalker.
Sorry in advance Jeannie Mai. 1806.
Before we start a band of pirates, make sure the game isn't set in a landlocked nation.
1807.
Even if the rules allow it, I can't have a saber toothed walrus.
1808.
Even if I buy enough for everybody, snuggies alone will not raise crew morale.
1809.
If I get to pick my position in a star spanning empire, can't pick Fire Chief.
1810.
Even if the rules allow it, can't be on good terms with an organization sworn to destroy
me.
1811.
Doesn't matter what I rolled, my ork can't have a space surfboard.
1812.
Not using any emission from the barbarian as flamethrower fuel.
1813.
My troll's biography will not include the phrase 'sweet, sweet love'
1814.
My battlecruiser does not inclue a discotheque, bowling alley, IMAX, or strip joint.
1815.
Can't have a gun capable of using other PC's as ammo.
1816.
The Druid doesn't have to change sides every time the tide changes.
1817.
Can't target the starship's radiator. 1818.
Can't make a bluff check to convince the monster I actually hit him.
1819.
Strapping dynamite to an arrow is an acceptable cliche.
Not the whole keg of gunpowder. 1820.
Let's not see how far I can lower crew morale before the game begins.
1821.
Even if the rules allow it, the Soviet National Anthem doesn't qualify for the inspirational
music ability.
1822.
When told to play a teenage high school girl, that doesn't include East German swimmers
named Sergi. 1823.
Despite what you'd think, taking out a child molester with extreme prejudice doesn't restore
my humanity.
1824.
'Getting Uppity' is not a capital offense.
Even to a Rogue Trader. 1825.
No taking Peace Activists as favored enemies just because they are easy targets.
1826.
Before we have the bard loot the dungeon, make sure he's clear on the spelling.
1827.
No starting Fight Club.
1828.
Remember to take the helmet off before I use the acid spit ability.
1829.
Darth Vader does not need his air filter changed.
1830.
Deer Season is restricted to rifle or bow.
Not greco-roman. 1831.
Drunken Master is a feared martial artist.
A Drunken Journeyman is not any 5th level dwarf.
1832.
No result on the Impact Critical F chart reduces a foe to base elemental components.
1833.
If we're short on cash no starting a telethon. 1834.
Star Destroyers don't have help desks.
1835.
Can't take poison immunity, coat my food with cyanide, and see who's been stealing my lunch
from the fridge.
1836.
A talking animal sidekick is okay.
One that sings Disney tunes is roadkill. 1837.
I won't ask how a 9' combat monster with no concept of subtlety starts with a +1D in stealth.
1838.
Can't lure ninjas out of hiding with a game of Marco Polo.
1839.
Even if the rules say otherwise, a huge back banner with an arrow pointing down at me causes
a penalty to stealth checks.
1840.
Doesn't matter if I get bonuses for eating fallen foes, no spending requisition on condiments.
1841.
No using ventriloquism to trick the Khorne Berzerkers into slaughtering each other.
1842.
You can't suplex a lictor. 1843.
Can't land the drop pod on the villain. 1844.
Even if the rules say otherwise, I can't actually use 500 grenades in a single mission.
1845.
I will use the security skill to open the door, even if it's easier to just rip it off
its hinges. 1846.
If the Ork makes his check to solve higher mathematics, his head doesn't explode.
1847.
No picking a sorcery that is actually unplayable as written.
1848.
Slapping a fake mustache on the freeboota doesn't count as a disguise check.
1849.
There is too an elven word for monogamy. 1850.
There is also an elven word for heterosexual. 1851.
Can't use woodchippers as shotguns against vampires.
1852.
Afros are not acceptable haircuts for Adeptus Astartes.
1853.
I can't chew gum during chapter briefings, even if I brought enough for the entire Space
Marine Chapter.
1854.
TSR is not hiding Golden Tickets in Mystara Gazetteers.
1855.
Using a barber's razor as a weapon does not make me a barbarian.
1856.
I will refer to the radar contact as a Blitzer-72 MBT, and not as a TPK in a can.
1857.
No unloading all my remaining ammo in the last bad guy so I don't have to carry it back
with me.
1858.
The answer to 'how to spell sousaphone' is V-E-T-O.
1859.
No challenging Death to a game of Tic-Tac-Toe until he gets bored and quits, ensuring my
immortality. 1860.
Summary Execution Man is not an appropriate name for a super hero, even if it is accurate.
1861.
Can't take a favored enemy I can't kill for another ten levels.
1862.
Even if the rules allow it, I can't hip shoot a cannon.
1863.
I will stop asking the Ultramarine why his chapter's primary color isn't ultramarine.
1864.
Even if paladin starts with P and that rhymes with T, it doesn't stand for trouble.
1865.
No wasting Music Man references on a 10th grader.
1866.
Even if the rules allow it, can't have a poisonous lascannon.
1867.
Can't have a gun that reduces people to Rorschach tests.
1868.
Playing the Who doesn't give me a bonus to forensic checks.
1869.
You can't count coup with power weapons.
1870.
If I'm invited to play a one shot with a new DM, can't play a serious straight laced character.
1871.
No tricking the techpriest into dividing by zero.
1872.
My Rogue Trader can't upgrade his ship with a ice rink, duck blind or vomitarium.
1873.
Stormtroopers will only fall for the broken comlink trick so many times.
1874.
Even if elves are a dying race, can't start a forced breeding program.
1875.
Before I make the seduction check, I will reread the description of the swinging knack.
1876.
I will stop telling the new players gnomes came from Sverfneblia.
1877.
I will stop asking the high elf for a hit.
1878.
Elves are not all backstabbing, untrustworthy weasels, but you never hear about a dark gnome
do you?
1879.
The halfling's natural enemy is not the pedophile. 1880.
Elves are not piercing weapons by default.
1881.
No shooting the Quarren at the start of the adventure, even if it would have immediately
solved the last four adventures instantly.
1882.
The monk counts as adamantine when attacking, not when being used as a battering ram.
1883.
Even if the rules allow it, my fighter can't carry a clan of halfings in his pack without
penalty.
1884.
If a PC gets taken out by a deer, can't recruit the deer to replace him.
1885.
Considering we don't have a TARDIS or a bag of holding, we can stop speculating on how
they would interact.
1886.
Can't trick the GM into starting a conversation between the Doctor and Inspector Columbo.
1887.
If I use the leap skill to individually jump over every goon in the room, when I reach
the other side I can't demand to be made royalty.
1888.
Even if the rules allow it, my marine can't requisition a rolex.
1889.
Slapping a meltabomb on the Emperor's Children marine and putting his resulting efforts to
get it off on Youtube gets me a Corruption Point.
1890.
My Rogue Trader doesn't have spend Requisition Points on feminine hygiene products.
1891.
Dreadnoughts don't get conjugal visits.
1892.
No matter what the module says, slaughtered and dissected scientists cause more san loss
than frozen dogs.
1893.
Can't take Speaks in Third person quirk just so I can use the lyrics to Battery as an attack
plan.
1894.
No mounting my rival's anti-gravity plating on his ceiling.
1895.
The Escaped Fugitive background doesn't include from Disney Teen Musicals
1896.
Even if they have blond hair, blue eyes and are proud of their physical perfection, Aasimir
don't appreciate Seig Heils. 1897.
Assist Other actions helps in combat, not with crossword puzzles.
1898.
No hiring Anakin Skywalker some Twilek hookers, thus removing his reason to become Vader.
1899.
The target's current zip code has no bearing on my called shot.