- What's the biggest secret you kept from me?
- Um
I guess I told you I wasn't masturbating when I was.
(laughs)
("Serenade No. 13 in G Major" by Mozart)
- Hello.
(both laugh)
- I'm Christa.
- I'm Cody.
- I'm Natalie.
- I'm Evan.
- We dated in high school and that's why we're here.
(laughs)
- Yeah we actually haven't seen each other
in like a really long time.
- Yeah, a while.
- Well, I was actually, can we take a shot first?
Just to warm up?
- Oh wow, okay.
Have your sexual abilities improved since high school?
- Hmm...no. (laughs)
I still last the same as I did freshman year. (laughs)
- Like two minutes.
- I mean that's just when we get going, you know.
- Stop.
- I mean you gotta be serious!
- Have your sexual abilities improved since high school?
- Oh yeah. (laughs)
- What's them new moves?
- Depends on the person, depends on the penis.
(both laugh)
- Can we go to next question now shit.
- Of all the lovers you've had, where do I rank?
- You're the top one, you're just like
what I find attractive in a girl.
- Yay.
- Of all the lovers you've had, where do I rank?
- The best I guess.
- Out of the whole two.
- What the fuck are you guys...
- Females and males?
- Two.
- More than 15, less than 20 probably.
How many of them were women?
Probably like...
8?
- She had more sex with women than I did.
Alright let's move on. (laughs)
- Did you have your first orgasm with me?
- Yeah...
- Oh hell yeah.
- Yeah.
- But you've had partners before me.
- You're number one.
- Oh, really? - Mhm.
- What move was I hittin' you with?
When I made you nut? (laughs)
- Well you ate me out. (both laugh)
- What did you learn from me in the bedroom,
that I set you up for future lovers?
- My idea of sex was always super short
so if sex was super long it would hurt my feelings.
(laughs)
- Well I mean it was good sex and stuff
but like between us but then with other people
it's like, it'll be like why is this so long?
- Did I help you out?
Let me know. - (laughs)
It was like the first time like,
having oral, like, sex with a woman.
(both laugh)
I learned a lot from that.
- The little finger thing.
- What finger thing girl?
The bowling ball was it like two
in the pink one in the stink, what was it?
Oh, it was like a really quick motion on that G-spot.
- What would have happened
if we had gotten pregnant in high school?
- Oh shit, we would have had an abortion for sure.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
- That couldn't have happened,
but we got lucky that we're two girls so.
- I would have never seen myself being like a teen mom
or something like that, but I would probably, like,
want to do everything to like make it work.
- Mhm.
- How long did it take you to get over me?
- What is like "over you" mean?
'Cause we talked about, like, getting back together
in the future up until I got pregnant pretty much.
- Mhm.
- Yeah. - Mhm.
- No we didn't, we were just like, uh,
we'll figure it out when it comes, basically.
- Who broke up with who?
- Ooh see, you broke up with me didn't you?
- Yes.
- You did, yeah.
I wasn't really "out" per se.
- I was, literally hiding in your closet from your mom.
She could be on her bed
and her mom got home from work and I hid in the closet.
Shaking for my life.
She's gonna beat me down when she finds me here.
(both laugh) - Oh my god.
- What's the biggest secret you kept from me?
- I told you everything.
I literally told you everything all the time.
- Oh you're going to hate me.
Remember when we broke up in high school
around like prom senior year? - Mhm.
- Cause you thought I had slept with somebody?
- Yup, mhm.
- I did.
- I figured.
- Are you hurt?
- Kinda.
- Are you? - Yeah.
- I knew that you would be.
- I figured, like, I knew this was going to happen, low key.
- You knew they were going to ask something like that?
- Something like that.
- Interesting, how were we wrong for each other?
- Oh man. We'll just say we're both crazy.
- At least for me we just like,
never, like, hit a point of, like, clicking.
I sound like a tool saying that but I dunno.
- You didn't like me enough, that was what was wrong.
- Sounds so sad, don't wanna talk about that now shit.
- It was like complacent. - Mhm
- But we're also like young
and like trying to figure it out.
And not knowing exactly, like, what we want out of life
was conflicting. - Yup.
- How were we wrong for each other?
- 'Cause we were young and I was crazy
and needy and you were kind of a dick.
- Alright next question. (laughs)
- No I'm good.
Kiss me like you did in high school.
- I have to take a shot. I can't kiss you.
- We can take shots to that.
- Kiss me like you did in high school.
- Like I did in high school?
Do you remember we used to bite each other lips hella?
- No.
- You would just bite my lip once and it'll be good.
- Okay.
- Ah!
- No you go that way.
- Aah!
- There you go. Cool!
- Alright, last question you ready?
- Did you always know that we wouldn't last?
- No.
I thought you were the one, then your crazy side came out.
- What's my crazy side?
- Your angry side (both laugh)
- Guess I gotta get my crazy out, not so crazy.
- For the next...
- For the next person, I got you.
- We're done here. - We're done.
- I for sure thought we're gonna last, for forever.
That time we broke up I just knew
that things just weren't going to be the same.
- Are you happy that we dated?
- For sure! Definitely. Are you kidding me?
- We were like best friends, we did so much.
I wouldn't have done like half of that shit.
- Yeah, like streaking, like climbing buildings,
it was just like, I mean it was high school silly stuff.
- Do you miss being in a relationship with me?
- Yes.
- (laughs) Is that what you want us to do?
- Yeah for sure. - Definitely.