Welcome back to the show.
Ever since the great ass-whupping of 2010,
Democrats have consoled themselves with a prophesy
whispered by their soothsayers.
The Republican Party as we know it is dying.
Traditionally Republican states,
like Texas, now turning purple.
Will Texas politically shift from red to purple
sooner rather than later.
Oh, please.
If Texas looks purple, it's only because the beating
doled out by Republicans left a giant bruise.
If the tragedy mill that was 2016 taught us anything,
it's that the world is getting sadly less purple.
Yet, the fantasy persists.
Georgia has also typically been a red state,
but its changing demographics are moving that state
in a purple direction.
It is a traditionally red state,
but it's slowly turning purple.
Up next, is Georgia about to turn blue?
Don't hold your breath, liberals.
You'll turn blue before Georgia does,
because while progressives work on their vision boards
and wait for babies of color to grow up and save them,
Republicans are out there winning state elections,
then immediately changing the laws to make sure they keep
winning, just in case Democrats do decide
to vote next time around.
Speaking of elections, in Georgia,
a Republican majority state Senate
is set to vote on a bill passed by the House that would redraw
nine of their districts in an effort
to protect their majority.
The changes would reduce the number of people of color
in districts, where these Democratic-leaning voters have
threatened to oust Republican incumbents.
Republicans swear they're not trying
to marginalize the black vote.
But the shapes of the new districts
are kind of a tip-off.
[LAUGHTER]
The sponsor of that redistricting bill
is the congressman from Georgia's
131st, Johnnie Caldwell.
Before we meet him, can we all pledge
not to say anything that perpetuates
negative stereotypes about rural Southerners?
Let's talk about some of the things this bill does
and some of the things this bill does not does.
God damnit, Johnnie.
What does it just tells ya not to does?
Now, before he took up racial cartography,
Johnnie Caldwell was a judge.
What kind of judge was he?
We asked some people who had been in his courtroom.
My name is Karen Wilkes.
I'm a public defender in Georgia.
Karen was assigned to defend a young black man who had spent
six years in jail because Johnnie's
britches were bunching up on him the day he showed up in court.
Johnnie Caldwell committed one of the worst
violations you could possibly commit as a judge.
He denied him his right to a lawyer,
the most fundamental of rights.
When he finally got the lawyer that the Sixth
Amendment guarantees him, he was found not guilty in 45 minutes.
Yet he spent six years in prison fighting for that one
day and 45 minutes to be exonerated, because Johnnie
Caldwell stuck him there.
As anyone who watches "The Walking Dead" knows,
Georgia can be a tough place for black guys.
Oddly enough, that is not what got Judge Johnnie in trouble.
This is.
There were other remarks that I heard on a voicemail
that Judge Caldwell said to my attorney, Susan Brown.
And there were voicemails that were left.
And they were very inappropriate,
and made very sexual advances to her.
He leaned in to give me a hug, and crammed
his tongue in my mouth.
If I wanted an order signed in my favor,
I needed to come to his office and take down my pants,
and at least let him look at it if I wasn't
going to let him touch it.
Some of the sexual comments in this transcript
are so graphic we can't repeat them on television.
We can.
[CHEERING]
That attorney testified that, quote,
he told me to wear my pants a little bit tighter in court
so he could read my lips while arguing.
[GROANING]
Uh, Judge, didn't your school teach sex ed?
We don't speak from our vaginas.
We speak from our boobs.
And sometimes, our boobs pick up the phone
and call the judicial watchdog group.
Former Georgia judge Johnnie Caldwell
was frowned upon by the JQC after being
accused of sexual misconduct.
Judge Caldwell abruptly stepped down,
writing in his resignation letter to the governor
that he wanted to spend more time with his grandchildren,
and promising to the Judicial Qualifications
Commission investigator that he would
never run for Judge again.
First of all, I want to spend more time with my grandchildren
is politician for I'm guilty as shit.
No grown-ass man is trying to quit his job to play Lego.
Johnnie was publicly disgraced, and had to hide away in shame.
Instead, he ran for higher office, from the courthouse
to the statehouse.
Oh, right, I forgot where we lived for a second.
Now, look, I can see rewarding a gropey perv
with higher office once.
I mean, that's just normal.
But how the hell did the labia whisperer win
three consecutive elections?
Was he running against Charles Manson and Jerry Sandusky?
Representative Caldwell is running
unopposed for re-election.
God damnit, Georgia.
You can't fin one lady in Thomaston
with a pussy hat and a law degree who wants to take
the attorney-licker down?
Come on.
What about you, Republicans?
I know Thomaston is full of honorable conservatives
who don't think women's breasts are a convenient armrest.
Oh, hey, that's my mammogram face, too.
Now, in fairness, the voters of Johnnie's district
may keep sending him to Atlanta just
so they don't have to worry about him
roaming their streets at night.
But it would be nice if they had a choice.
Johnnie Elbow Tits is so sure that no one's ever
going to pry his ass out of his congressional seat,
he feels comfortable using a recorded phone
line to offer favors to other serial sexual harassers.
A 300-page Internal Affairs investigation concluding
Captain David Gibson sexually harassed
and assaulted several women inside
the Sheriff's office for years.
Johnnie Caldwell in Thomaston, Georgia.
I'm trying to figure out a way to help to see
if we can stop this thing.
And you're not going to owe me a dime.
I'm trying to help the department
and help these folks.
Oh, what a mensch.
As they say in the South, Beauregards before Horegards.
But Johnnie's not alone, except on the ballot.
In George's last election, over 80% of candidates
ran unopposed.
Out of the 165 incumbents running for re-election,
know how many lost?
Three.
And none of them was the guy who asked to see a pussy in court.
So Georgia, what the fuck?
Look, I might be an out-of-touch matcha latte-drinking,
beard-sporting New Yorker, but I think Georgians would agree
with me that Johnnie Caldwell Jr. is a total creep
who shouldn't be making laws.
And perhaps one of them would like to challenge him
in a primary, because I refuse to believe that Georgia's 131st
contains more people who've been sexually
harassed by Caldwell than people willing to run against him.
We'll be right back.
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