- Hey, I'm so sorry to bother you.
Could you just watch my stuff?
I'm gonna run to the bathroom.
- Oh sure.
- Thank you.
(dramatic music)
- Hey!
Get the hell away from that stuff!
- What?
- I said get away!
- Ahh!
How clever of the owner of those belongings
to appoint someone to watch her stuff.
- That's right.
No one's going near that copy of "Eat, Pray, Love" as long
as I have anything to do about it!
- Fine, I guess I'll just have to steal the secrets
of self-empowerment elsewhere.
- Don't worry, I'm watching that lady's stuff.
- Oh are you now?
Think you have what it takes to protect
that lady's chapstick from my dry, dry lips?
- Go for my lips easily.
- I'm thinking I have what it takes, chap.
What do you think you're doing?
- I'm just busing this coffee cup.
- That cup belongs to the nameless woman in the bathroom.
(claps)
I have snipers planted all around this cafe to end anyone
who goes near that stuff.
If you do... (gunshot)
(screaming)
Now scram!
- Okay.
- But also can I get more half and half please?
Thank you.
No one is going near those belongings.
You got that chumps?
- That woman was incredibly smart to have someone
watch her stuff, but those cough drops will be mine.
- That highlighter in there?
Sure would be mighty helpful highlighting
my friend's screenplay.
- Don't forget that loose pack M&M's she put in there
a month ago and forgot about and now they're just loose
and crumbly at the bottom.
That stuff is tasty.
- No one is stealing that stuff!
Nobody!
(laughing)
(coughing)
- Soon, my slightly annoying cough will be cured.
- What happened here?
- Don't worry, your stuff is safe.
- Where are my cough drops?
- Oh.
Oh I'm sorry, I didn't know.
They must have taken it.
- I said watch my stuff.