Hey guys, welcome back thanks for joining me for another video. So this week I want to dive into
Procrastination I think this is a great topic because if you're honest with yourself
You're not a perfect. Human you procrastinate it on something in your life, and I love finding out
Why's so why do people suffer with procrastination?
Really to the point where it's detrimental to them right where they never take action on the things that they should
That are healthy for them. So let's get into why people
Procrastinate and really what are the things that we have to do to kind of overcome this for ourselves? So we
Can do things that are good for ourselves are healthy for ourselves
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I'm a life and relationship coach if you are a subscriber, welcome back if you have never seen any of my videos
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So let's get right into this week's topic
To start things off with procrastination one of the most important things that you have to do in your life
I believe is set goals for yourself. The reason why we have to set goals is because it gives us something to
Achieve something to work towards so if we don't have any goals in life
Then who cares if we even procrastinate on anything, right?
Because we don't care about anything, but if you really care about something and you have a goal that you want to obtain
Or something that you want to achieve
This is important towards working towards healing some of the things that are going on inside of you that are perhaps causing you to not
Achieve that goal. So with procrastination it's important to understand how our mind works so we all have an ego and
Our ego at times wants to keep us stopped
The reason why it wants to keep us stuck is because that part of yourself doesn't like change. It doesn't like being uncomfortable
It doesn't like stretching ourselves
Even if we know something is actually good for us and we have to stretch ourselves to maybe get out of our own comfort zone
So we can achieve this goal so we can grow as a human being that part of you doesn't want
Anything to do with that that part of you just want you to sit comfortable in your little pool of daily
Activities and routines that you do that don't force it to feel
Uncomfortable or to work hard or anything like that? The other aspect of procrastination that I think is really important is how we label
things in our life that we have to do so
That ego always will gravitate towards the thought of oh if I do this and this is bad
Then I don't want to do it if it's gonna stretch me and make me uncomfortable then. I don't want to do it
It's almost like having that ego is almost like having a child
That's relentless to want to do something that you as the parent know is good for the child and the child
Perhaps is kind of dragging their heels in the mud on doing this thing
That is very good for them and healthy for them and that will help them in life
So as a parent you look at that child that's dragging their heels and saying all the negative stuff as why
doing what they have to do stings or isn't fun or I don't want to do it or all these negative stories that they've
Put around this thing that they have to do and you the parent come in and you try to I guess maybe convince
The child or get the child to see the positive sides as to doing this thing, right?
So hey Joey, you know if you do this like this will allow you to meet new friends
This will allow you to take care better care of yourself eating. Well is good for you like all of these things
So we as the parent put a positive spin on
The negative stories that the child is saying as to why they shouldn't do this thing that we know is good for them
So it's all about the stories that you tell yourself and here we go with parenting ourselves, right?
so if I want to go to the gym and lose weight
Or if I just want to get in shape or if I just want to feel better about myself and I've said okay
I'm gonna make small goals for myself and that's really important. It's
It's better in life to create small goals for yourself that you know are achievable rather than setting this huge goal of like, okay
I've never gone to the gym before and now I'm going to go five days a week
So if I've never done something and I'm going to begin creating new habits for myself
I want to make sure that they're small obtainable goals
And once you have obtained that small goal
Then you want to stretch yourself to push yourself a little bit further to obtain a different
It's no different than going to the gym and lifting weights. You're not gonna go and start lifting 50 pounds
You're gonna go and start lifting small amounts and as you get comfortable and it becomes really easy to lift 20 pounds
then you might go up to 30 just a small example, but
all
Procrastination has to do with is a few things number one the stories that you tell yourself
So the story is well if I get up and go to the gym
It doesn't really matter because I'm probably not gonna lose the weight
Anyways, well if I start this business, I'm probably not gonna make any money on it
Anyways, well if I so it's if I you know, eat the salad well
Then I won't be satisfied and I won't get to eat the chocolate cake like the chocolate cake tastes better
It's what I want to do and it's almost like a child
you're just indulging in these negative stories rather than being the parent to yourself and
Choosing what is best for you and putting that healthy choice putting a positive spin, which is not lying to yourself
It's putting the reality putting the actual reality the truth about doing this thing
In front of the negative story that you're telling yourself
so again
The ego doesn't know that by making you a little uncomfortable
By pushing yourself right that it will actually allow you to have the things that you want in life, right?
And this is here we go with self motivation. Here we go with, you know self-worth. Here we go with self parenting
Here we go with having positive and healthy self-talk a lot of what I talk about
It doesn't matter any aspect of the topics that I talk about on this channel
It all has to do with self-talk it all has to do with self parenting and has to do with the inner
Conversations that you have with yourself and being very mindful of what it is that you are saying to yourself
So people some people don't practice mindfulness. Some people aren't really aware
They don't question the thoughts that they think right they don't say well, okay, I'm procrastinating right now
I know I should be doing this and I know I just told myself a story as to why
she can get up and go to the gym or why shouldn't work on this thing that I know I need to work on or
Why I shouldn't go change the laundry over, right?
But I know I should do it and start having these inner
conversations and start picking and choosing the thoughts that you want to think and
Recognizing when the negative story comes where that negative story is coming from for me
That was like really huge when I started pinpoint. Oh, here's procrastination. Here's the ego that wants to keep me stocked
I knew that when the ego started talking and was telling me that negative story. I knew that that wasn't my story
I knew that that was ego talking. I knew that that was probably just a wounded scared part of myself. That was really nervous
I knew that when the ego was saying those stories to me that that was just really that part of myself that was like wounded
And scared and insecure and that I had to help that part of myself. It was that in her child
That was like look why even bother like why bother getting up and and working on this business like I'm not gonna make any money
Or why why push myself and go to that gym by myself into a class by myself
Like why push myself out of my comfort zone? What is the point?
It's very easy to just indulge in those negative stories. It's a matter of and I say it all the time
it's a matter of
Practicing new habits to create a new you right to create healthy self-talk the more you do it the easier it gets
I constantly constantly I'm saying that in the very beginning when I started challenging my thoughts or even
recognizing procrastination and
Sometimes I can recognize it easily and sometimes I don't and I indulge in it and then at the end of the day
I'm like well how I didn't do what I needed to do because I procrastinated so I think the biggest thing with procrastination is self-worth
Believing and knowing that what you want is going to happen knowing that you are the creator of your life knowing that you are no
different than anyone else and you are worthy of everything that you want in your life and then it literally
can happen as long as you work hard towards a goal and
Not needing to know when it's gonna happen how it's gonna happen where it's gonna happen
Just knowing that it's gonna happen and just take an action every day towards those small goals and you eventually will reach that goal
so for me
I think that I started living life like that and it's and honestly it created a lot of peace in my life
it created a lot of happiness because I didn't struggle so much with
Trying to control the when and the why in the how or anything like that?
I just worked hard every day in many areas of my life in
eventually, you see the result eventually eventually what you want comes to fruition as long as you're not concerned about the whys and the how's
And the wins and the negative stories if you can let all that stuff go. That's the wall that's in front of you
That's basically blocking everything that you want to come to you
You know when we have the stories of what if I don't succeed
what if what I want doesn't come to fruition and look we're all human we're gonna have those stories from time to time we have
We all have an ego. I mean I
Still have those stories that come up for me
But it's a matter of do you in the moment of that story starting?
Like I say the tape when the tape starts playing do you play the tape over and over again?
Do you indulge in the tape?
Do you live in the tape as if the tapes really happening and it just defeats you to the point of not even getting up?
And taking any action or do you understand where that tape is coming from?
and that that tape has nothing to do with you that tape is part of old programming and do you take do you take
Initiative in those moments of the tape slang to stop the tape and say you know what? I'm not going there right now
I'm not believing the tape that tapes not even me
I'm not even thinking any of those thoughts that's just part of like my wound itself my ego self that part of me that's like
Really really scared and in the beginning what I always say is actually even the best for you is to parent that tape
Sit down with that tape and have a conversation with it. Why do you think we won't succeed?
what are you so scared of helping yourself through the fears that you are having remember all of
Procrastination has to do with like I said setting the goal making sure we know what the goals are making sure. There they are
obtainable goals and
Knowing what you want self-worth right letting go of all the what-ifs right all the ego stuff
What if it doesn't happen?
What if I can't succeed learning how to parent that part of ourselves and then just taking action at the end of the day?
Nothing ever will come to fruition for you unless you get up and take action
so if you want something bad enough if you
Have a craving a desire for something because you that you deserve it to me
The self-worth the deserving part that's really at the forefront
That's really at the top because from me I always looked at it like the minute
I really knew I deserve something we can all say. Yes, I deserve this
yes, I deserve a great relationship, but you have to have such an
uncontrollable knowing and urge just a feeling inside of like I know I deserve this and I'm going to get it like you have to
Be hungry for what it is that you want and I think if you're not hungry enough for something that you want
That you know is good for you and healthy for you. Then it comes back to the stories that you tell yourself
So you're obviously telling yourself a story as to probably why it may not happen why it could not happen
What if it does happen and it doesn't work out what if I fail?
What if I don't succeed what if I do succeed and I can't handle it like all of those stories
So being mindful of the stories attending to those stories parenting those stories. This is about self-love
This is about you taking care of yourself. This is about you learning how to be the parent for yourself
So and I always say you don't need to have children in order to learn how to self parent
Just think of all the people in your life that when they call you and they're going through something difficult
or struggling with something in their life how much you show up for everyone else and what you give to them and how that should
Be all the stuff that you're giving to yourself
So I hope that you have enjoyed this video
If you did, please don't forget to give it a thumbs up and I will see you next week