- Red Balls it gives me wings!
(audience laughing) (can popping open)
Mm, hum-in-a, hum-in-a, hum-in-a!
(intense music) (television crashing)
- What'll it be guys?
- I'll have a Scotch on the rocks.
- I'll have a Samuel Adams.
- I'll have a Samuel Jackson.
- You know something?
I'll have a Samuel Jackson too.
- Me three.
(laughter)
- Three Samuel Jacksons coming right up.
(upbeat tropical music)
- Good motherfuckin' choice motherfuckers.
Samuel Jackson made painstakingly by me, Samuel L. Jackson.
It'll get you drunk, you'll be fucking
fat girls in no time.
You might even fight a nigga or two.
Mm mm bitch.
(audience laughing)
How's it taste motherfucker, huh?
- Can you stop yelling at me please?
- No I can't stop yellin' 'cause that's how I talk.
You ain't never seen my movies?
"Deuce" that was a good one.
"Deep Blue Sea" they ate me, a fuckin' shark ate me.
Drink bitch!
"Jurassic Park!"
Samuel Jackson, it's my beer!
Yes, they deserve to die and I hope they burn in hell.
(audience laughing)
Hello.
My name is Cairo Biggins.
Sometimes in this pursuit of crack
leaves me tired and depleted,
but now Cocaine comes in a delicious shake.
Red Balls, it gives me wings!
(audience laughing) (can popping open)
Mm, hum-in-a, hum-in-a, hum-in-a!
- My baby (shrieks)!
I locked my baby in the car. (baby crying)
(signal beaming)
(baby crying) (audience laughing)
(intense action music)
- Oh my God!
(glass breaking)
(woman wailing)
(suspenseful music)
(audience laughing)
F.Y.I. people still do steal radios hoe.
How you think I got this suit?
(audience laughing)
That Red Balls got me (screaming)!
(audience laughing)
(signal beaming)
(audience laughing)
(intense action music)
- Mayday, mayday, we have a crack head
lifting up the bus, it must be Red Balls.
(audience laughing)
(intense action music)
- I love this drink.
Thank you Red Balls.
Excuse me jailer, pardon me,
might I have a Red Balls please?
(can popping open)
Shazam (screaming)!
(intense action music) (audience laughing)
(bricks crashing)
Red Balls, cocaine in a can baby.
(audience laughing)
I can get some money for this.
(audience laughing)
- [Narrator] 25 years ago an epic motion picture
was unleashed on America, considered one of
the most important films in history.
We are now proud to release this
masterpiece on DVD for the very first time.
This one of a time 25th anniversary
commemorative edition features extras
including cast interviews, Director commentary,
and never before seen outtakes.
- Kissy behold the only thing
greater than yourself.
Ohh, oh!
(audience laughing)
Oh, hey I'm sorry.
I told y'all not to give me a real baby.
(audience laughing)
Pissing all over me and shit.
- [Narrator] Catch all of the gags,
spills, and hilarious practical jokes.
- [Together] (humming) I'm looking forward--
- To carry me home.
(audience laughing)
- Your name is Toby.
- Kunta Kinte.
(whip slashing)
- I said your name is Toby!
- Kunta Kinte.
(whip slashing)
Damn! Steve what I say about hitting so hard man?
- I'm sorry, are you all right?
- You sorry?
I'ma show you sorry man, I'ma show you sorry boy.
(quirky rock music)
(laughter)
I told y'all he scared of me.
(laughter)
(quirky rock music)
(mumbles) Let me get up there.
(audience laughing)
- [Narrator] "The Roots" 25th anniversary
commemorative edition on DVD--
- [Announcer] Including all Wal-Marts.
(audience applauding)
(soft calming music)
- It's real shitty down here.
- Oh my it's Redman.
- Hey, where do you get these stains
from with your stinking ass?
- It's just so hard to keep my toilet white.
- (scoffs) Well baby that's why I
got the new toilet freshener.
My shit is the bomb bitch, I'm tellin' you.
- Redman, well how does it work?
- Well, the motherfucker works like
spray it in the toilet and the enzymes
and shit collaborate together,
makes some kind of mixture and get all that shit.
You got celery, and llama beans, and corn,
and chicken bones and shit in here.
(audience laughing)
- It was yummy going down.
- You need something, why not call on your man?
Holla!
- [Narrator] Redman Potty Fresh,
the only toilet bowl cleaner with
enzymes and shit that collaborate together
to make some kind of mixture that
gets your toilet bowl sparkling white.
- You got those awful stains out.
- Flush the toilet with yo' pancake ass bitch.
(audience laughing)
- Sorry (chuckles).
(toilet flushing)
- Hey, Redman Toilet Freshener, I'll get the brown out.
(bell rings)
(static stuttering)
- Whew.
Oh snap! What's up dog?
- If you let one drop hit this motherfuckin' WaveRunner,
I'ma kick yo' motherfuckin' ass.
- Debra?
Oh girl, I should shit on you!
(audience laughing)
- Hey, when you're done close the
motherfuckin' lid 'cause we got some
business we gotta take care of.
You know what I mean?
- I should pee on y'all like R. Kelly.
(audience laughing)
(static stuttering)
When the baby was born I promised
Karen I'd quit smoking but I didn't know how.
- Well that's when a friend of mine recommended O'Dweeds.
It's the first brand of marijuana with no THC.
So it's like O'Douls but for weed.
(audience laughing)
- Now I can get that full reefer aroma
without any of the guilt!
(audience laughing) (lighter flicking on)
(water bubbling)
Shotgun little buddy!
(audience laughing)
- Aww (chuckles), I think he likes it.
(laughter)
- This reminds me of when I was a girl and
I used to smoke grass with all the negro jazz musicians.
- Come on Martha.
Now, puff puff give.
(audience laughing)
Come on you little bitch!
- [Narrator] O'Dweeds, all the reefer, none of the guilt.
(calm reggae music)
- I know what you're thinkin' but
it's O'Dweeds man (laughter).
(audience laughing)
- Can I hit that?
(audience laughing)
- Ah, take it.
(calm reggae music)
- Takes like the chronic and yet it's not.
(laughter)
- Wrong bag man.
(car tires screeching)
- [Narrator] Forget about your reefer needs,
go ahead and try O'Dweeds.
From the makers of the Crack Patch.
(audience laughing)