[
♪ Oh
♪ Are you a little crazy?
[ Sniffs ] Mmm.
♪ And alone?
[ Pop! ]
Do you need to be opened up slowly
like a muscle in hot water?
[ Sighs ]
Am I making you uncomfortable?
Are you a fan of independent cinema?
[ Chirping ]
Ahh.
♪♪
I love to live, but I also live to love.
Ahh.
[ Gasps ]
[ Horn playing ]
[ Gasps ]
[ Horn playing ]
[ Chirping ]
Do you think you could love me?
Call now.
♪♪
[ Whistling ]
-Aah!
We've been expecting you.
-Me?
I have the answers you seek.
Come closer, ask me a question,
and surrender a small fee to receive your fortune.
[ Coin clinks ]
[ Knuckles crack ]
Um, who is my soul mate?
Ah, yes.
I will now seek counsel with the spirit world.
Please tell me how many rotations
around the sun have you completed?
-Oh, uh, my age? I'm -- -
Please tell me the name of your first pet.
Her name was T--
Very interesting.
Place your palm below.
Now just a few more details.
Are you afraid of the dark?
What do you see here?
How many fingers am I holding up?
Do you prefer dogs, cats, or lizards?
Pick a card.
Which one do you think is more me?
I have summoned
[ Distorted ] the answers you seek.
You will find your fortune
[ Echoing ] below.
♪♪
[ Wind rushing ]
♪♪
[ Wind whistling ]
♪♪
[ Shing! ]
♪♪
♪ I saw a humorous photograph
♪ I couldn't smile, I couldn't laugh ♪
♪ I talked to a pretty girl
♪ But my heart, it did not stir ♪
♪ Then I read a book of poetry
♪ On the way to the zoo
♪ Where I saw six birds in a tree ♪
♪ But they, they would not sing ♪
♪ Because I'm dead inside
♪ I'm dead inside
[ Distorted ] ♪ I'm dead inside
♪♪
[ Ringing ]
Hello? Hello?
Yes, um, would it be permissible
for me to maneuver your donuts?
No. No.
No, we've got a contract out for that right now.
-Thanks. -Pardon me?
We already got somebody that does that.
Does what?
Does our donuts.
I'd simply like to come into the market and --
and maneuver the donuts.
Nah, I'm sorry.
Oh, yeah, come in and purchase them.
That's fine.
Um, I'd like to handle them personally.
Uh, well, sorry, you can't.
We already have people hired.
Come in and fill an application, then.
No, I'd simply like to place them, um,
strategically throughout the store, is all,
instead of just in the case.
Well, yeah.
Well, hey, you know we got caller ID right now,
and we're tracing this call.
How about if I threw donuts at you?
Bleeeeeeeeeagh!
Narrator: Then morning your breath smells...
sour. Gross.
♪♪
At noon, you'll consider going to the store,
but why bother?
Everything's gone expiration date.
Even you've gone expiration date.
Pathetic.
Go on. Go do normal things.
[ Warbling ]
♪♪
Ah, what dumb limes.
[ Warbling ]
Aah!
Narrator: This is a stupid idea,
but in the evening you'll call her anyway,
and she'll say...
"Hello."
And you'll say...
[ Sniffs ]
Narrator: ..."Fancy a drink tonight?"
♪♪
[ Sniffs ]
Narrator: "Why bother?" she'll say.
♪♪
Then morning, your breath smells...
sour.
♪ Valentine's Day is not for the lonely ♪
♪ We get to have every other day ♪
♪ Valentine's Day is not for the lonely ♪
♪ We get to have every other day ♪
♪♪
I think that sometimes we take things for granted
so we won't be so overwhelmed and collapse from amazement,
'cause there's some crazy shit going on.
Like gravity.
It's like a massive force
that pulls everything towards it all the time.
Even when I lift my foot to take another step, I'm, like,
resisting this invisible force, and it's like, "Come to me!"
And when I drop a bowl of cereal,
I'm like, "Oh, bummer. Now I have to clean."
The more accurate response would be,
"Holy shit, that was crazy!
What is going on?"
Okay. Trees.
N-No seriously.
And they look like the kind of [bleep] they find on Mars.
For some reason it's coming straight out of the ground,
and it grows like zombies.
L-Look at it! W-Why?
W-What is it?
If I had to give it a sound, it would be something like,
Pleeeeh! Whish! Waah!
Alright, strawberries.
Who came up with this [bleep]?
It looks like Christmas in heaven or something, and --
and you can put it in your mouth,
and it's like what did I do to deserve this?
And dogs?
A few years ago, it was a wolf.
We just gave it love and look what happened.
And water? What?!
Birds, electricity, and wind,
ink, clouds,
fire, hands, feet, music,
USB stick, coconut water,
rocks, cactus, coffee, crystals,
a boat, salt, language,
rainbow, sperm, sand, space.
It's c-- It's crazy.
Crazy shit.
♪ Deedle
-♪ Doddle -♪ Doo
♪ Dubba-dubba-dubba
♪ Deedle
-♪ Doddle -♪ Doo
♪ Dubba-dubba-dubba
♪ Deedle
-♪ Doddle -♪ Doo
♪ Dubba-dubba-dubba
♪ Deedle
-♪ Doddle -♪ Doo
♪ Dubba-dubba-dubba
♪ Oh, the moonlight
♪ Sweet moonlight
♪ Got you in my sight
♪ Is tonight my night?
♪ Send me true love
♪ From your stars above
♪ Won't you shine down my love? ♪
♪ Oh, you seem nice
♪ So sweet, nice
♪ In the moonshine
♪ Won't you be mine?
♪ Be my true love
♪ And I'll be your love
♪ I'll be your love
♪ Oh, the moonlight
-♪ Deedle -♪ Doddle
-♪ Doo -♪ Dubba-dubba-dubba
♪ Moonlight
-♪ Deedle -♪ Doddle
-♪ Doo -♪ Dubba-dubba-dubba
-♪ Deedle -♪ Doddle
♪ Say tonight's the night
♪ Moonlight -♪ Deedle
-♪ Doddle -♪ Doo
♪ Dubba-dubba-dubba
[ Wind rushing ]
♪♪