A curse on anyone who utters a word of what they have seen.
Welcome back,
'There are Dark Corners.'
Thank you, Mr.. Cushing
Full house.
This is Dracula A.D. 1972 and let’s be quite clear about this;
any film with Peter Cushing or Christopher Lee, let alone Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee,
in their classic roles, will always have something to recommend it.
‘Count Dracula!'
On the other hand they’re not infallible.
‘I wish to God I was’
The first problem with Dracula AD 1972 is right there in it’s ridiculous title
‘Outrageous, outrageous’
It’s easy to see what they were going for ..
‘Something new, yet as old as time’
but when the period becomes a film’s raison d’etre
‘Dig the music kids’
You have an issue.
And from it’s opening party...
‘Still at it’
to it’s ludicrous soundtrack...
this film might just as well have someone open each scene by saying ‘It’s 1972 you know’
‘Hey but it sounds wild’
Hammer’s classic films are timeless,
this one has the life expectancy of a jellyfish nailed to the wheel of a steamroller.
‘I wanna forget about it, just forget about it’
It wouldn’t matter if the film delivered elsewhere but while the movie over delivers on one half of its title,
it massively under delivers on the other.
‘Come on love it’s only a giggle’
It’s Lee and Cushing together in a Dracula film so where the hell are they?!
We barely see them!
‘You’re joking?’
Instead we get these irritating hippies!
Who spend their time doing creepy versions of recent Disney songs
‘Let it go, let it go’
You think I’m watching ‘Dracula’ for them?!
‘Are you taking me for a twit?’
I’m tolerating them in the hope that any minute, Christopher Lee will rip their throats out!
?! ‘The operative word is yeuch’
Obviously Hammer was trying to appeal to a younger audience by having lead characters whom they recognised,
who dropped acid and were promiscuous.
‘Ghastly horrible obscene'
But they don’t deliver on that either.
'I've never dropped acid, I'm not shooting up, and I'm not sleeping with anyone just yet.'
So they let down their old audience and their new one!
'Work of a maniac, I'd say.'
Sure Christopher Lee gets a great death scene with a cartwheel stuck in his chest.
but it’s somewhat offset by the new young vampire getting killed by a shower.
I thought they were trying to make young vampires cool.
‘A date with the devil’
This is Johnny Alucard and if I had to pick one thing that pissed me off most about this film, he would be it.
Not his character...
‘I call on Andras’
although that does irritate the crap out of me, his name.
Was that really necessary?
‘If you write his name backwards it spells Dracula’
Just in case you missed it earlier. And that’s the thing, this isn’t the worst film ever,
it’s not trying hard enough to be that, it’s all just vaguely half-arsed.
‘What do you mean vaguely?’
The title promises so much...
‘I promised you nothing’
And from Hammer, I expect, no actually, I demand more.
‘You demand?!’
Now admittedly, this would matter less if the plot wasn’t unoriginal, predictable, cack.
But it is.
‘I’m not convinced’
someone has clearly said ‘forget atmosphere, forget tension, it’s Dracula 1972;
such a dynamite idea, we won’t even need a plot’!
‘Relax’
Bite me.
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