80s heartthrob, a sex tape, a lawsuit, a 30-year marriage, taming the wild side and driving
82 miles every day to see your love?
How is all this connected?
And how do Gwyneth Paltrow and Keanu Reeves fit into the story?
Rob Lowe and Sheryl Berkoff’s romance will give you all the answers.
In today’s video, we’re diving deep into the actor and the makeup artist/jewelry designer
decades-long marriage.
Rob Lowe and Sheryl Berkoff’s love story had a bit of a rocky start.
According to the actor, the pair first met all the way back in 1983, when they were set
up on a half-blind date.
However, after a couple of dates, Rob and Sheryl realized they weren’t ready for any
kind of commitment.
Both were very young at that point — Rob was around 19, and Sheryl was about 22, so
the two went their separate ways.
After breaking things off with Keanu Reeves in the late 80s, Berkoff and Lowe found each
other again.
Seven years after they met, Rob was filming Bad Influence, and Sheryl was the makeup artist
on the film.
The second time was the charm for the couple, sparks flew, and the duo began dating.
They fell madly in love and have been together ever since.
“I had the feeling that if I was ever going to be able to make it work with anybody, it
was Sheryl,” Lowe said, recalling feeling “seen” for the first time in his life.
The pair got married in 1991, but their road to the altar was not easy.
Lowe suffered from alcoholism and had a sex tape scandal under his belt.
However, the actor is actually crediting his 1988 sex tape with positively changing the
trajectory of his life.
More than two decades ago, a home sex tape which included the actor was leaked to the
press.
On the video, Lowe starred in a steamy encounter with a 23-year-old girl and her then-16-year-old
friend.
Rob was around 24.
After the tape’s release, the actor maintained that he didn’t know that Jan was underage.
He ultimately settled a lawsuit with her family and was not charged with a crime.
Despite the media firestorm he faced at the time, Lowe is thankful that the controversy
helped him refocus his priorities.
“I was like, ‘What am I doing with my life?’
I’m 29 years in and like people talk, but it’s the best thing that ever happened to
me.
I’ve been married 29 years and I have two great sons,” said Lowe a few years back.
But before that, he was a teen hooked on drugs and focused on fame.
“It’s not a great recipe for success to give an 18-year-old male fame, money, drugs
and expect there not to be something that goes wrong,” he admitted.
As his career exploded after 1985’s St. Elmo’s Fire, he was riding high... in every
way.
He emulated his St. Elmo’s character, the “loveable rogue” Billy Hicks, for years,
he says.
The overnight celebrity and hysterical fandom were especially disorienting.
“I became so identified with it — the wild, fun, rock and roll, quasi-debauched
with the heart of gold guy: that’s my early twenties in a nutshell.”
He enjoyed a succession of starry romances, including Melissa Gilbert and Princess Stephanie
of Monaco.
In addition, he indulged in fast-lane living that would make Keith Richards, Jack Nicholson
and Warren Beatty — Lowe’s role models at the time — proud.
“I tell my kids, be careful who your heroes are,” he says.
“I literally designed, consciously and unconsciously, my life around their example.”
Lowe’s bottom came in 1990 when he was 26.
Home after the usual late night of partying, Lowe listened as his mother left a message
on his answering machine saying his grandfather had a heart attack.
She pleaded for Lowe to pick up.
He did not.
Rob eventually embraced what would be a lifelong commitment to his recovery — and to Sheryl.
The actor credits his wife, his “love bug”, with helping him change his ways.
Sheryl Berkoff, who’s been by the actor’s side for more than 30 years, is a successful
fashion and jewelry designer.
A graduate of the Fashion Institute of Technology, Berkoff has quite a resume of makeup on film
and TV projects, including Frankie and Johnny, specifically working on Al Pacino.
She is the owner and founder of Sheryl Lowe Jewelry, which has a men’s line called Mr.
Lowe — inspired by her famous hubby and their sons.
Lowe and Berkoff have two children together — Edward Matthew, a lawyer, and John Owen,
an actor and writer who works alongside his dad on 9-1-1 Lone Star.
“I always wanted that life, I really wanted kids.
I wanted a normal life outside of Hollywood,” he said.
“I am so blessed to have found the right person, that I found a soulmate and someone
who I think is so hot and smart and funny.
Great mother, great businesswoman, I am just super, super blessed.”
While the family likes to keep their private life private, they are all active on Instagram.
Lowe often shares sweet pics of his sons, who are the spitting image of their father,
and who love dissing him on Instagram.
For their part, Matthew and John Owen, feel fortunate to have grown up around such love
— and aren't above taking advice from their dad.
"’I married my best friend, and it's worked out perfectly for me.
So take that advice.’
... He gives little pearls of wisdom like that that I keep with me.
Hopefully, I will end up in a 30-year marriage like him," Matthew said.
Throughout his run on The West Wing from 1999 to 2003, Lowe commuted the 82 miles between
their home in Santa Barbara and L.A. daily, so he could be with the family and kiss the
boys at bedtime.
The actor remains forever grateful that Sheryl took a chance on him, calling his long-lasting
marriage one of life's greatest "miracles."
In addition to giving his wife credit for taming his wild side and helping him get and
stay sober, Lowe says Berkoff was indeed the right woman for him.
The actor says that they chose one another wisely.
“People always ask, ‘Do you have any advice about marriage?’
and I’m reminded of when they asked Alfred Hitchcock about making a hit movie.
He said, ‘It’s all about the casting,’ and that’s the same with marriage.”
He also added that communication can still be a struggle for him and Sheryl.
In the past, Rob has been open about how the whole family attends therapy to strengthen
their bond.
“The one thing, though, that has been a part of our family is the notion of therapy
as a sort of proactive, non-shaming practice, like a trainer,” he said.
In an interview with Rachel Ray, Rob also made it clear that his wife was his best friend.
He also advised that if one wants to marry their best friend, they should go ahead with
it.
Rob is not the only one who thinks Sheryl is his best friend, though.
Apparently, Gwyneth Paltrow has some pretty strong ties to Sheryl Berkoff.
"I met Sheryl , and I was, like, immediately obsessed with her.
First of all, she was dating Keanu Reeves, who was my celebrity crush.
And she was so cool.”
She noted that the pair met when she was in her late teens while Sheryl was working as
a makeup artist on Gwyneth's mum's movie.
"She knew that I was sneaking cigarettes, and she would come smoke with me behind the
trailer.
And she taught me to do other things, all the classic Sheryl stuff.”
During her appearance on the podcast, Paltrow also spoke about how much she appreciated
that Berkoff treated her like an adult.
The Oscar-winning actress added that she "just worshipped" Berkoff.
"I thought she was literally the coolest chick of all time.
And she was so awesome to me.
Like, the fact that she loved me that much before I was anyone or anything, you know?
Same with you."
It’s no secret that Rob Lowe has had incredible success as an actor.
He achieved heartthrob status as a member of the Brat Pack, and his career continued
with standout performances on TV throughout the decades.
“I’ve never been happier, personally or professionally, and there’s not a day that
goes by where I’m not thankful about it all,” Lowe said.
Over time, the actor has worked hard to craft a life of personal and professional balance.
Clearly, Rob is in a good place now, and Lowe’s are as in love as they were 30 years ago.
Here’s to many more years!
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