Jory: (in monotone for intro only) Hello, I'm Jory Caron, the host of "Is it a Good Idea to Microwave This?" Hold on one second...
Mmmm! The pause that refreshes: Pepsi! Some may say it's the only cola, unless your loyalty lies with the other cola. Then you might want to see this one get microwaved!
*theme song plays*
Jory: Let's go roast some nuts!
Jory: I wonder how long I should put it in there? Three minutes? Okay!
Jory: Ventilation is key!
Jory: Oh, jeez!
Jory: Safety is our number-one concern.
Jory: Yeah, I think it's just gonna catch fire.
Jory: 'Cause nobody likes roasted nuts!
Jory: Definitely a good idea!
Jory: Stopping, stopping!
Jory: Is it a good idea to microwave this?
Well, let's find out! Here at "Is it a Good Idea to Microwave This?", safety is our number-one concern. That's why we hide behind this door covered in tin foil.
We don't know if it really does much, but if it does, it'll protect our nuts, because nobody likes roasted nuts!
So, out here, we have two fans, you know, and our Sharp microwave. I love her! I love this microwave- Diane, it's the love of my life! How many times can I say that? Maybe once more? I love her!
I wanna spend the rest of my life with her! She's been good to me! In goes the Pepsi.
Jon: Jory, you gave that a pretty good shake!
Jory: Yeah, I know! Yeah, I'm hoping the microwave will finish it off.
Jon: Let's do a full five minutes for this boy!
Jory: Five minutes? That's what I thought... Okay, now, let's retreat, and this time, we really should retreat!
Jon: (in exaggerated Boston accent) Let's get outta here!
Jory: Ladies and gentlement, that is a Pepsi can.
Jon: This one is actually frightening!
Jory: It's really frightening!
Jon: The crew and cast of "Is it a Good Idea to Microwave This?"
Jory: I'm insured. Are you guys insured?
Jon: My roasted nuts are not! A couple sparks...
Ezra: (laughs) The suspense is killing me!
Jon: This one's gonna, like, burst open and not hurt us, but it could be disastrous...
Ezra: I wonder if Coke would behave differently?
Jory: We're probably gonna get a lotta comments about that, actually.
Ezra: (imitating annoying YouTubers) "Pepsi sucks! Coke rules!"
Jon: (imitating annoying YouTubers) "If you had used Coke 1, it would've had a different result! Diet Coke has different substances in it!"
Jory: (imitating annoying YouTubers) "Mix it with Mentos!" How 'bout you shut up, you know? That's all I gotta say!
Jon: Yeah, I am really sick of the Mentos comments, let me just say that! We're not gonna do Mentos and Coke!
Yeah, read my lips- we're NEVER doing Mentos and Coke!
Ezra: Or Pepsi!
Jory: I really hope this bursts, because, if it doesn't, I'm afraid to remove it from the microwave! If it went through that, through this window, and I died, I would just be really impressed! I would just be, like, "Wow!"
Jon: Your last thoughts would be "I'm impressed."
Jory: "I'm impressed! I didn't really think it could do that!"
Jon: Do you see smoke? I think we're just cookin' everything that's still in there.
Jory: Yeah, I think everything in there is just turning blacker and blacker as we keep going.
Jon: Probably, yeah. What about...? The Coke seems unaffected!
Jory and Ezra: Pepsi.
Jon: Same [beep]in' thing!
Ezra: Oh, there's liquid all over that now, dude! Or it's just getting blacker! I can't even tell!
Jory: I think it's just getting blacker.
Ezra: It's just blackening that plate forever!
Jon: Alright, let's cease the experiment. This is just not goin' anywhere.
Ezra: Whoa! Jeez! (coughs) Let me plug these lights in...
Jon: (coughs) Jesus!
Jory: Mother of God! I'm gonna open this really slowly...
Jon: Alright, this is... Should we be present for this? We're just gonna die quicker!
Jory: Okay, you guys ready?
Jon: It may not have been a very good show, but it sure as hell put out a funky stink!
Jory: Okay, ready for this?
Jon: Man, what is that smell?!
Jory: It's everything burning.
Jon: I think it's the smell of everything we've done!
Jory: Okay, ready?
Jon: Oh, my God! Look at the smoke comin' off of that plate! We have completely charred this thing! Aw, man!
Jory: Okay, back up...
Ezra: Structural integrity seems good! Is it full?
Jon: Roll it back- I need to see the side of that. It looked like it was...
Jory: No, it's just because it's been rolling around in this gunk.
Ezra: Oh, God! Don't take your masks off!
Jon: Oh, my Lord! That's one way to clean a microwave- just fry everything!
Ezra: Self-cleaning! (to Jory) You've gotta tap it. Make sure you get the bubbles out.
Jory: Do we have any, like, string I could attach to open it better?
Ezra: Just open it. Don't be a pussy! It's not gonna explode. It's just gonna shoot soda everywhere.
Jory: Yeah, hot, hot soda!
Ezra: Open it away from the camera!
Jory: You guys ready?
Jon: Yeah!
Ezra: Look out! Steaming-hot Pepsi!
Jon: Wow! Alright, that's going on the victim's board for sure... Not too much, not too much. We have to clean that up later! OH! Hey, hey, hey- let's go easy!
Jory: It's okay. We'll just clean it up with some bubble water! Okay, so is it a good idea to microwave Pepsi? No, it's not!
Jory: It smells a little bit more like Pepsi in here now, but it also smells like other burnt crap! Don't do this in your household microwave!
Jory: That's it for this episode of "Is it a Good Idea to Microwave This?" I'm Jory Caron.
*end credits play*