at the same time bill humor is so
polarized fox news trying to launch a
late night comedy show
trying to compete with colbert and
kimmel how's it going
well you know the gutfeld show is what i
expected which is that
it's not really about comedy or satire
it's about
revenge the idea is to tell jokes
that get them riled up and they're not
being entertained they're being incited
and the idea is for them to say yeah
that'll show them
oh he got me still why wouldn't brian
stelter defend me considering i gave him
his start in cable news
brian i like to play a little game where
i just stay in my apartment
and i don't pick up the phone and just
see if anybody anybody will come and
check on me
have you ever thought about doing that
and no one and no one pays the rent i
mean the landlord came after seven years
to a victim
i want a landlord who won't evict me for
seven years exactly
it makes no sense you know with harry
he's like a little adorable hamster
[Applause]
[Music]
too bad the oscars were last week
because the cia could have gone home
with more gold than william devane
have you seen their latest recruitment
video it's a gut-wrenching portrayal of
one woman's triumph
over bigotry and injustice in a world
filled with pain
and confusion i'm a woman of color
i am a mom i am a cisgender millennial
who's been diagnosed with generalized
anxiety disorder i am intersectional
but my existence is not a box checking
exercise
wait didn't she just check every box
by the way who actually says i'm
intersectional
i mean besides my couch
here's here's more i used to struggle
with imposter syndrome
but at 36 i refuse to internalize
misguided patriarchal ideas of what a
woman can or
should be i am unapologetically me
i want you to be unapologetically you
whoever you are
ah just what we wanted in a secret agent
one who blows their cover
five seconds after meeting you
they replace cia with tmi talk about
oversharing
how can this person go undercover aren't
spy supposed to have a secret identity
and not identify openly as
18 different things forget name ranked
serial number
yes my name is susan thomas i am an art
dealer traveling abroad
but really i'm a bisexual non-binary
gender studies graduate with student
debt and childhood trauma who's in the
cia
whoops i should have left that part out
and i have to kill you
the whole point of being the cia is not
being true to our identity whether
you're latin x or scottish
especially if you're scottish the
bagpipes are a dead giveaway
so i say get over yourself or selves but
sadly wokeness is
now how we do business and even the cia
is in on it
man was i dumb i thought that kind of pc
builds had an
expiration date once you graduated like
playing hacky sack or listening to cat
stevens
the understanding was that this stuff
was worthless once they left college
but i was wrong the websters are now
officially everywhere drowning us with
their box checking vernacular
could you imagine being interrogated by
a new age agent
talk about torture ahmed we saw you
purchase the ingredients for the pipe
bombs
you were obviously acting out against
the racist classes patriarchal
colonizers trying to prevent you from
being your best
most authentic self as a result of your
lived experiences as a survivor of your
chronic bed wedding or as we call it
creative peeing
you will confess to anything to stop
them from drowning on about themselves
yes yes i had a bomb in my shoe please
stop forcing me to list my favorite role
models of color
so i admit this is like shooting
sustainably raised salmon in a barrel
this video is not exactly top secret and
this woman is serving her country so
good for her
but every blinking yahoo on this planet
can see how silly america's premier
intelligent agency actually is even
twitter laughed
but not the cia these videos came out of
multiple meetings and strategy sessions
the fact that they put this out there
is kind of a huge blind spot and spy
agencies shouldn't have blind spots it's
like your dad getting an earring for his
50th birthday
maybe this video might even get people
to join the caa cia but me
this level of malarkey couldn't get me
to join an orgy
but maybe that's the point one more
non-binary intersectional type means one
less angry white male like me on staff
right angry white male
[Music]
how would i describe myself well regular
guy i guess
i like sports i like i guess i like my
job
love my family what's this for the news
i hate the news
you got to wonder what the world thinks
of this our enemies are giggling like
don lemon on a bicycle
it's just the image that i find humorous
fact is we have foreign enemies who
dream of nothing more than killing each
one of us every day
and i doubt that oprah level university
approved talking points about gender and
race would scare them
and by the way have you ever wondered
what a politically correct secret agent
might look like
we already did
this christmas bond is back like you've
never seen him before
you're hungry i had an extra one you're
not gonna hurt me
course not violence is so uncivilized
it's the same james bond you know and
love rewritten to please even the most
progressive socially conscious moviegoer
in 2018.
what'll be sir let me guess martini
shaken
not latte soy
latte extra decaf extra decant
are the beans sustainably sourced i only
drink organic
farm raised home-grown cruelty-free
coffee
i have no idea
with intrigue and suspense your move w7
is it no seriously is it i don't know
how to play this game i saw at a ted
talk recently that competitive
activities
only encourage toxic masculinity and
marginalize disenfranchised communities
into unjust
hierarchical structures reinforced by a
bigoted and corrupt system
you're bluffing what's a bluff and it
isn't a bond film without
seduction well james i've had a really
lovely evening
cats come inside you know i don't
appreciate the heteronormative
assumptions in your proposition
it's regressive anti-neo-feminist
rhetoric like that that perpetuates a
patriarchal society
of oppression and gendered subjugation
not the least of which
i care to contribute to you could have
just said no
so get ready for the most politically
correct secret agent of all time no guns
no gambling no girls it's james bond in
the spy who consensually agreed in
writing she loved me
you must be q it's lgbtq
your mission should you choose to accept
it is to reject virtue signaling of all
kinds
good luck this segment will
self-destruct in five seconds
let's welcome tonight's guest she chairs
the senate subcommittee on
awesome fantasy senator marcia blackburn
she went from pom poms to truth bombs
outnumbered co-host emily compagno
she's three days into her first marriage
foxy's contributor cat tim
and his tattoo artist charges him by the
yard
my master sidekick and host of enough
set up fox station tyrus
all right senator how did you what did
you think when you first heard that
video i mean it's
it's it's the language that drives me
crazy i like the fact that she's serving
the country but it's the cia
it's the little it's touchy feely well
the cia should be about
recruiting the best and brightest that
there are
about protecting this country about
stopping
bad actors bad people bad things
from happening and here we are
putting the focus on someone that has
impostor syndrome
and it's completely inappropriate you
know it's interesting about that when
you say imposter syndrome nobody knows
what that is but
cat yeah we all know it imposters yeah
it's like kind of how i'm this huge
superstar and a national treasure but i
don't really
realize that about myself
everybody has imposter syndrome right
because that's that
what that means is you think that you're
not you think people
are going to find out that you're
actually not good at what you do right
even yeah i do i am worried
about that even though i'm excellent and
unparalleled at what i do
um look i just think that this and the
reaction all of it kind of proves how
broken
and how the democratic party and the
left in general it's not just that
they're obsessed with wokeness that's
kind of all that matters to them
because it's not shocking to see that
conservatives don't like this i mean it
is pretty ridiculous
but on the left um you know jacob and
meg's the only place i saw point this
out hey
you know the cia is not woke with their
decades of you know hyper militarization
and all these things
these are things that liberals are not
supposed to like but oh look at this
nice ad
she made a nice little word salad of all
these nice buzz words that everyone's
supposed to say and then boom that's
enough just like how for
vice president they nominated a corrupt
cop because she had the identity
politics that fit that's all that
matters and it's crazy
it's an interesting trend because
corporations are realizing that if you
use the woke vernacular they will
overlook
everything yeah like not paying your
taxes yes or
making uh you know ice cream that'll
like give you uh heart disease in 10
years yeah
justin trudeau blackface multiple times
like anything if you use the right
buzzword may have make the right
buzzword salad of wokeness
you're fine so emily good to see you
that's all i can wait for it
um now this is part of this is part of a
i think a series called humans of the
cia which by the way the title is pretty
funny
because it sounds like we know they're
humans in the cia but it's
it's like they were trying too hard to
appeal
it's again it's like you're 50 your dad
getting an earring
it's just like so the cia is trying too
hard absolutely and they're the last
agency that needs to try it all
that's the other thing like we all know
what goes on behind those closed doors
right we've all seen the movies
we know it all and that's why that video
that you guys made is so funny because i
just kept thinking to myself
mitch rapp would never make a video like
that jasonborn
or double07 would never make a video
like that and then you did and it just
pulls
back the curtain of what a farce this
entire thing is that they're trying to
do and i think
you know from a management standpoint
it's such a failure because when you
invite in
topics that divide in politics into the
workplace right of course they're going
to bring it with you with them
and so it's going to become a monster
you can't kill and for an
agency like the cia or law enforcement
agencies we need them to be a certain
plug-in play
we need them to be code before self we
need to understand that if an agent
can't make it or doesn't show up another
one will perfectly replace them in the
same standard
not to a different standard because i
just want to raise my hand and talk
about my differences
yeah and recruiting based on those
differences over the similarities in the
code is a disaster and it's dangerous
and i also don't understand why we are
advertising to our enemies that like
the cia is staffed with anxious
individuals yeah
it helps no one although i would make a
great cia agent because i'm anxious
all the time and i'm constantly thinking
people are out to get me
you're with tyrus here's the thing that
don't look at me like that you look like
you're waiting for something horrible to
happen
you are okay who why does the cia need a
recruitment video
when everybody loves to be like like
when you when i met mike baker it's like
he's in the cia
it's like the coolest job ever do you
really need recruitment videos to get
people to join the cia
it's a great title i'm still stuck on
imposter syndrome i don't
i don't get it you're saying
you struggle from lying about yourself a
lot is that impossible like you're
you're really deep down a pirate but
you're just doing this cia
thing until the ship comes in i mean no
it's
[Laughter]
the bigger the bigger problem in this
that i noticed and i only watched it
like
three or four times so i wasn't sure
what i was watching i was
waiting for someone you to walk out and
be like gotcha
but i didn't hear anything about america
in that entire thing or serving your
country or
don't worry three a.m i'm on the job
well we know you can't because of the
imposter syndrome and the anxiety you
don't like
dark quiet places so you can't do it
like this was like the
the me we're not we're not about country
we're about me and
this is the one business where you
cannot be singled out and recognized and
given
participation trophies for being in the
cia you're supposed to be
uh america first duty to country and
honestly yourself is second you know
it's interesting i think that's probably
the concern besides just the language to
me is so strange
uh because it's not original this
language is being passed along
through through academia and everybody
picks up on it but it is the i it's the
triumph of the me
over the we wow i just came up with that
kind of threw it i kind of put it up
there for you
well in your case set shot but you know
that's unnecessary hey sean hannity here
hey
click here to subscribe to fox news
youtube page
and catch our hottest interviews and
most compelling analysis
you will not get it anywhere else