This video is about "Stop Putting People on a Pedestal!" I'm going to reveal reasons why
you must stop putting people on a pedestal
in and around your life... to find out more please stay tuned to this video....
Welcome to The SCG Show! Please hit the like button for the YouTube algorithm and turn your life
around with BetterHelp! The link to BetterHelp is in the description just down below... What does it
mean to put people on a pedestal? It's to think of someone as perfect, with no flaws. We can put almost
anybody we know on a pedestal in our personal, and even our professional lives... we can put parents on
a pedestal by saying "my parents know best than me, everything they say is gospel!" when sometimes
your parents don't know what's best for you and actually might hold you back in life! We could put
friends or extended family on pedestals saying "look how attractive, fun, cool, successful they are!
they deserve my admiration!" Yet whilst all that may be true (and just opinion) perhaps under the
surface these people are riddled with problems insecurities and anxiety... And of course we can put
our romantic partners, our crushes, our partners who we're married to on pedestals by saying "they're so
attractive...so wonderful... charming...I want to praise them for their looks and status!" When again maybe
they might be narcissistic, toxic or just blessed genetically... but aren't down to earth and normal...
Modern society (thanks to social media too) has begun praising people for little to no
effort and because they look good in photos, behind layers of filters, clever lighting, makeup, editing
etc the most unattractive person can look like a supermodel on social media, and with that comes
an army of followers and people praising them for literally putting a photo on the internet. They'll
say "you look amazing! or I'm obsessed with you! I can't deal with you! I can't go on without you!" Look
at the language that these people use nowadays to describe one another, even if it's tongue-in-cheek
this raises the ego of the other person and at the same time makes the original commentator feel
massively inferior! "No guy as successful as him is ever going to love me...No beautiful woman like her
is ever going to want to be with me...." this needs to stop because pedestaling people has gotten
extremely out of hand and I've noticed how bad it's got over the last couple of years for sure....
Therefore here is how in my opinion to stop putting people on a pedestal...
If you're enjoying this video please hit the like button for the YouTube algorithm and support
my channel by becoming an official member! The link for SCG memberships is just down below...
Treat them like a celebrity and they'll treat you like a fan...
When we put a person on a pedestal (for whatever reason and no matter who they are) we're literally
treating them like a celebrity or like royalty... when we praise them and see no flaws at all or
worse genuinely believe they are too good for us our minds race with the following
thoughts = "I'm lucky to know them or be in their presence...I'm so lucky to even be talking to them...
I'm lucky they are even with me right now..." this all breeds from a deep lying issue of attachment
and on top of that some serious insecurity... So long story short = a deep feeling of unworthiness
There was once an insecure father that groomed his kids to behave and act exactly how he wanted them
however in doing so he fed them false lies about society and people = "never speak out a turn" he'd say
"never cause an argument... never think you're better than anyone... always seek to be liked by all people....
do not make enemies be friends with everybody you can..." and of course this was deeply flawed advice
as both his kids grew up riddled with anxiety and insecurity! They turned into serial people pleasers
and whilst many people knew them etc they were never respected and on top of that their needs
were never met....The son of this father just concluded late in his 40s after putting on
a pedestal everyone he knew the following = "it doesn't work! People like me put people
on pedestals and above myself and my needs...I became a doormat and I got more rejection from
jobs, opportunities and women in the long run...always putting people on a pedestal..."
Nobody likes a pushover, when you pedestal anyone for any reason realize it's a complete waste of
time and it I'm telling you this now it never works the way you want it to! Now as I mentioned
we sometimes pedestal people because we have feelings of abandonment and attachment issues
which is why I'd like to tell you about my sponsor BetterHelp! I personally used BetterHelp and found
it so effective for turning my life around for the better! It's an online portal that provides direct
to consumer access for behavioral health services... The online counseling and therapy services are
provided through web-based interaction as well as phone and text communication... BetterHelp gives you
four live sessions a month and unlimited messaging in between sessions as well as access to group
therapy webinars which are updated each and every single week...You can sign up for the BetterHelp
online counseling service in the description below, by using that link you'll be supporting my channel
and i'll give you 10% off your first month too! So stop putting people on a pedestal and please turn
your life around for the better with BetterHelp! The link is in the description to BetterHelp just
down below! Since it obviously never works when it comes to pedalling a person you should also
recognize it's unattractive - mainly to genuine healthy people! I'll discuss toxic people next...
Why is it unattractive? Let's say I met a beautiful woman and she was genuine and respectful not toxic
and I started praising her for her looks all the time? Maybe I've literally just met her in person
or on a dating app? Perhaps I started simping over her and saying the following "I'm not worthy
of you... you're like an angel to me... I am not good enough for you... I want to drink your bath water..."
These are all statements that simps say while she might slightly be overwhelmed with the compliments
and praise initially deep down she'd start to lose respect for me... she does not want somebody
to treat her like a celebrity.... she does not want a man to make her feel like she is better than him..
The good healthy genuine woman wants an assertive confident man who believes in himself!
The man that believes he is the prize and she is the compliment to his life! That in
my opinion is attraction! Pedestaling doesn't work ever to attracting women or men for that matter
this can also go beyond looks too... A while ago I met a lovely woman who ticked all my boxes
and what i was looking for for a partner = she was attractive, sweet, kind, had a good sense of humor
I fell for her personality, she was charming etc but that is where I screwed things up! I thought
"she's so lovely that I must treat her extra special not lose her! Because someone like her
comes along very rarely!" She picked up on this, noticed how awkward and weird I was being until
eventually she said no because I had come across too needy and too desperate and rightly so, because
I did! Her personality was very rare and I actually really forced things when I shouldn't have done so...
So even I still make this mistake = putting people on a pedestal is unattractive!
You might be saying to yourself "but SCG there's a person I'm putting on a pedestal currently
and they respond well to it or they seem to respond or give me attention when I do that in
the first place! This seems to work!" Perhaps if the above or something along those lines is occurring
it's most likely you're associating with a toxic person, and a toxic person is anyone
whose behavior adds negativity and upset to your life. Many times people who are toxic are
dealing with their own stresses and trauma to do this, they act in ways that they don't
present themselves in the best light and usually upset others along the way... including yourself
I once had a serious relationship with a narcissist and I foolishly put her on a pedestal
all the time = she was very attractive so I thought "she was too good looking for me... she had confidence
about her!" so I assumed she was more assured than me....she had a very entitled attitude so I just
thought I had to give her whatever she wanted to please her! This was her popular catchphrase to me
and to many others in her life "I always get what I want, always!" Remember that quote? Treat
them like a celebrity and they'll treat you like a fan? Well that is how I felt, I was her biggest
fan - I was lucky to be with her, lucky to be seen with her, her needs mattered (never mine) her voice
was heard (I was never listened to) I was like an accessory, she was the celebrity! It was so utterly
painful to go through that especially for a long time...Toxic people want you to pedestal them...they
want to be treated like a celebrity... like royalty and they will gaslight and convince you to believe
it actually genuinely works! "I love it when you treat me like a princess" they say or "I feel so
good when you treat me like the boss and you're like a slave to me..." says the man (all kinks aside)
Toxic people will ruin your life and your mental health especially when you regularly pedestal them
Please don't forget to Subscribe and hit the bell notification so you never miss any
of my videos... Now this may be extremely biased and one-sided but I strongly advise you to get
off social media or limit it the best you can for your own mental sanity! Social media is the
easiest and fastest the most effective way to put anyone on a pedestal! This could be your friends
your family whoever! By simply pressing the like button you are validating an ego... you make them
feel like a mini celebrity and in the process you're just destroying your own self-esteem and
self-respect! By doing so you watch their social media like a hawk with the following thoughts
"Oh my god look how amazing they look in every picture! Wow look how much money they must have
they have such an amazing car it looks so cool... they work such an interesting exciting job!
they live such an amazing life! God I am nothing in comparison... I'm a loser, I'm weird, I hate myself!"
As a single man when I talk to women who ask me for my Instagram etc I tell them
"sorry I'm off the grid!" Those who act a bit weird to that response are clearly disappointed
because all they're trying to do is create and recruit
another follower to their army of fans who are hooked on their every post, story etc...
If you need social media for work, for your brand, by all means keep it, grow it....but if
you truly want to stop putting someone anyone on a pedestal get off it as soon as possible...