So many oopsies, but so little time.
{*Felix claps*}
Good evening, my name is Gloria Borger.
In Borga-Borga-Borga-Boo.
{*music*}
Let's just jump into it guys.
My name is Poppy Harlow,
And welcome to PewNews.
The most respected, trusted news sourse of all time.
Especially here on YouTube.
Thank you very much.
Now, our first story comes from Goose Wayne.
Last week, PewDiePie did a video.
On Goose Wayne.
Who appeared on Dr. Phil.
(Goose Wayne) -People that are breaking the law and I try to bring them to justice.
Now, it turns out, Goose Wayne has responded.
In the most epic way possi-
You're not supposed to say that!
(Goose Wayne) So Steve just sent me a reaction video-
(Felix) Thumbs up from me. I'll be watching. I'm a supporter now, I'll protect you when you come to Florida.
Well, considering all the Florida memes, it looks like I'm needed.
Wait, he's from Florida?
It all make sense now!
{*Felix laughs*}
(Felix) Police say man with no hands and no legs is armed and on the run.
In Florida!
It all makes sense now!
We need Goose Wayne in Florida!
(Felix) Florida man dials nine-one-one and demands a ride home to change his underwear.
We need Goose Wayne in Florida. {*Felix claps*}
{*Goose Wayne sighs*}
(Goose Wayne) Um, yeah, so, I have never subscribed to anyone before...
And, uh, so yeah
Butt 😏
It's about time! I liked- I like it, I like the video!
I thought the editing- the editing could've been better.
(Felix) The editing! Some constructive criticism on the video.
I appreciate that Goose [Wayne].
Uh, Brad 2 or Sive however, is in deep pain.
(Felix) I hope you realize the pain and suffering you have brought upon Sive.
I want to cry.
(Goose Wayne) The first person I subscribed to.
(Felix) The first person! {*Felix laughs*}
(Goose Wayne) I'm already here.
(Felix) Yes! {*Felix laughing*}
(Goose Wayne) Just gonna.
(Goose Wayne) Boom.
(Felix) And he hit the notification bell!
Thank you Goose Wayne.
Very cool.
On behalf on PewDiePie of course.
I am just Poppy Gloria.
Goose Wayne man, what a legend. Thank you very much. Namaste. (<Hindu Greeting)
(Goose Wayne) Like I said thought, the editi- The editing could've been better.
The editing, could've, been better. {*Felix claps*}
You hear that Sive?
The editing could've been better.
Everyone has been Tweeting this to Brad cause everyone thinks Brad tweeted i- I mean edited it.
And Brad 1, left a response.
(Felix) I cannot imagine caring about anything less and also, Sive edited the video so y'all can stop asking me this now.
But we are one and the same Brad.
That's right.
Equals rights, equal opportunities.
Thank you very much.
(Goose Wayne) I'm hungover man I do- {*Goose Wayne sighs*}, so....
My bad, I know this ain't like, a good video whatever but...
(Felix) He literally has porn open on his Chrome are you kidding me?
See, that's the thing- I saw this and I-.
(Felix) Eighteen-year-old blonde elf with braces-
Eighteen-year-old blonde elf with braces gets.. tucked in by Santa.
By Santa?!
I'm not supposed to give my op- Okay, alright. {*Felix claps*}
Eh, I'm still like- Seeing stuff like that I'm like "Ah, he's obviously trolling."
Maybe he's half-trolling.
I don't know.
I do know for a fact that I'm very proud of you guys for being so nice and supportive and not just going "LOL what a fucking asshole, fuck this, fuck that, fuck this guy." or something like that.
You know, there were some very constructive comments in there.
I was also generally concerned 'cause, like, I made the video and I wasn't sure if he was real or not, just 'cause it's such a weird story,
About a man, that, refuses to listen to his fiancée,
And he just wants to be Batman right before their wedding and-
He had, like, the censored version of his wife in the banner, so it's kinda like oh god.
But, he Tweeted out that he has gone on his first date,
In two months.
(Felix) With his fiancée, with no mask and eye paint.
You nine year olds helped me love myself more than you know.
It's no longer Felix, it's Dr. Felix. {*Felix claps*}
What a nice, wholesome message.
(Felix) He said that, h-he read a message that- He was inspired by a message saying, "Goose, it's not about the mask, it's about that man behind the mask."
And that really helped him.
So, I think that's really cool.
I'm really glad.
I also saw a video that he made with his fiancée, so I'm glad they're still together. {*Felix laughs*}
And, uh, it was honestly very sweet and it made me think, wow, this is actually real.
(Goose Wayne's Fiancée) I actually don't even really know who PewDiePie is.
(Goose Wayne) You don't even gotta post anything, we're just going to subscribe to PewDiePie for you, okay?
{*Goose Wayne's Fiancée laughs*} Okay, I'll be going with the nine-year-olds. {*Goose Wayne laughs*}
(Goose Wayne) Number twelve, "Did you know that Goose might have mental issues when you first got with him?"
(Goose Wayne's Fiancée) Oh my god, yeah.
{*Goose Wayne, Goose Wayne's Fiancée, and Felix laughs*}
So yeah, I don't know.
I think that
it seemed like a positive development and i'm happy to see it.
And i'm
glad that...
I don't know,
that's it