>>HEY MAN! YOU EXCITED FOR
THE NEW SEASON? >>OH YEAH!
SO EXCITED TO BE BACK ON SET! >>YES MY BROTHERS!
SO, HOW- HOW MANY SEASONS DO GUYS
THINK WE'RE GOING TO BE DOING? LIKE MAYBE EIGHT OR TEN-
>>OR 50 SEASONS. >>[LAUGHTER]
TRUST ME, THAT WOULD BE AWFUL. >>NO WAY!
HOW DID YOU GET THAT! >>I'M A TIME TRAVELLER.
>>TIME TRAVELLER OR TIME LORD. >>STOP PANDERING MATTHEW.
>>OW! THOSE ARE REAL!
>>I DON'T CARE HOW HE GOT IT. I JUST WANT TO WATCH IT.
>>WHAT? NO, JAMES!
>>YEAH, PUT IT IN! >>JAMES, NO!
>>COME ON! COME ON!
PLAY IT! PUT IT IN!
>>YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT- >>ALL RIGHT.
WHAT IS THIS? TOO MANY BUTTONS.
HEY GUYS, HI. WELCOME TO THE NEW SEASON
STARRING ME AND ONLY ME. >>THIS MUST BE SEASON 15.
THE ENTIRE CAST AND CREW GOES ON STRIKE EXCEPT FOR JAMES.
>>THIS IS A LIST OF ALL THE WORDS THAT RHYME WITH BISQUE,
INCLUDING SURNAMES. DISC, RISK, LILIANQUIST-
>>THIS GOES ON FOR THREE SEASONS.
>>HOW ARE THE RATINGS? >>[LAUGHS]
AMAZING. >>NICE.
-AND NOW LET'S MOVE ON TO THE SLANT RHYMES.
>>YOU WIN AN EMMY FOR THIS PART. >>OH, TYPICAL.
>>OKAY, SO ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU'VE SEEN ALL OF OUR FUTURES?
>>YEAH, YOU DIE IN SEASON SEVEN AFTER AN EPILEPTIC SEIZURE FROM
WATCHING THE OPENING CREDITS. >>I KNEW IT.
>>WHAT HAPPENS TO ME? >>THIS.
MR. STEIN, AS AN OUTSIDER I'D OFTEN WONDERED IF I'D EVER
FIND AN IDEAL HUSBAND, BUT THANKS TO YOU MY CARES
ARE GONE WITH THE WIND AND I AM NO LONGER MISERABLES,
BUT INSTEAD I CAN FACE THIS BRAVE NEW WORLD ALL DOLLED UP
LIKE PRINCESS BRIDE AND THANK YOU FOR LETTING MY WEDDING
COLORS BE THE COLOR PURPLE. >>[APPLAUSE]
>>THAT WASN'T EVEN A SKETCH. THAT WAS YOUR ACTUAL WEDDING.
>>R. L. STEIN IS YOUR BACKUP? >>I'M JUST AS UPSET AS YOU ARE.
>>YEAH RIGHT. >>GUYS, WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?
>>SO WHAT HAPPENS TO THE REST OF US?
>>WELL, NATALIE QUITS AFTER HAVING OCTUPLETS.
>>WHAT? >>WHAT?
NOTHING. MALLORY GOES TO PRISON AFTER
STRANGLING THIS SEVENTH MILLION FAN WHO ASKED
HER IF SHE'S DATING MATT. >>I DID THAT YESTERDAY,
BUT I DIDN'T GET CAUGHT. >>AND ADAM?
>>YEAH. >>THE SPECIAL EFFECTS TEAMS GETS
A LITTLE EXPERIMENTAL WITH YOU, SO- IT'S PROBABLY JUST
BETTER IF WE WATCH IT. >>JEREMY!
WE FINALLY HAVE THE TECHNOLOGY FOR PORTAL GUNS!
[GUNSHOTS] [SCREAMS]
>>HASH BROWNS? >>I'M NOT EVEN MAD.
>>DOES ANYONE ELSE CRAVING SOME HASH BROWNS?
>>YOU'RE GOING TO BE CRAVING A LOT OF THINGS.
>>WHAT? >>WHAT?
NO- >>LISTEN, GUYS,
JUST BECAUSE MAL, WHIT, JEREMY, ADAM, STEPHEN,
AND NATALIE ALL HAVE HORRIBLE FUTURE EXPERIENCES-
>>I DIE. >>-DOESN'T MEAN THAT
WE SHOULDN'T GO ALL THE WAY TO SEASON 50.
WE JUST NEED TO BE CAREFUL AND CHOOSE TIMELESS CHARACTERS.
>>LIKE? >>LIKE ECKLESTONE,
CAPTAIN LITERALLY, KYLE, SCOTT STERLING-
OH, SHOULDER ANGEL? >>PLEASE HUMBLE HIM JASON!
>>YEP. >>B9.
BINGO! I WIN!
>HEY! HEY!
>>WHAT? OH, HEY STACEY.
>>YOU WANT TO SEE A PIRATED VERSION OF PARKS AND RECREATION?
>>STACEY, YOU AGED SO WELL. >>YEAH I DO!
GET IT! GET IT!
MM. >>OH, I HAVEN'T SEEN
THAT IN 40 YEARS. >>OH AND I FOUND
A DVD PLAYER TOO! >>OH!
>>COME ON! >>I DON'T KNOW IF THAT'S
A GOOD IDEA, BUT UH- >>COME ON.
>>[COUGHING] POOF!
>>WHO ARE YOU? >>I AM YOUR ANGEL SHOULDER.
HERE JAMES! >>I'M JEREMY!
>>NO, NO! YOU'RE STACEY!
>>YEAH. >>I'M JUST GOING TO-
>>OH, OKAY. OH.
OH. [MUMBLING]
>>AM I THERE YET? >>YEAH, CLOSE.
IS HE CLOSE? NO.
OKAY. >>AH MY JOINTS!
>>YOU GOT TO WANT IT! >>LIKE CLIMBING A CORPSE.
WRITE CHECKS MY BODY CAN'T CASH. >>MY BODY-
>>[SCREAMS] >>I NEED MY PILLS!
PILLS! THAT WAS GOOD.
WHY DO WE MAKE THIS A THING? WHY DO YOU-
>>[PANTING] >>[PANTING]
>>JASON- >>YEAH?
>>DON'T LISTEN TO YOUR SILVER-FOXED FRIEND CYNDI.
>>LOOK, I'M NATALIE! >>DON'T LISTEN TO HER!
>>YOU GOT TEN SECONDS BEFORE MY BACK EXPLODES!
>>WHAT? >>I LIED.
YOU HAVE THREE! >>[SCREAMS]
>>OH! >>[LAUGHS]
>>AFTER SEEING THIS, I THINK WE CAN ALL AGREE
THAT WE SHOULD ONLY DO TEN MORE SEASONS?
>>IF THAT. >>BRUCE SKETCH UP!
>>GUYS, CAN WE TALK ABOUT CHANGING THE OPENING CREDITS?
>>NO! >>HEY GUYS!
WE HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE FIRST SKETCH OF SEASON SIX!
>>[CHEERING] >>IF YOU WANT TO SEE MORE,
THEN YOU BETTER SUBSCRIBE, OR ELSE YOU MIGHT MISS
ONE AND THAT WOULD MAKE STACEY REALLY SAD.
>>REALLY SAD. >>JUST STACEY.
>>I'D BE COOL WITH IT. >>NATALIE, DON'T SAY THAT!
>>SORRY! I JUST HAD TO.
>>SUBSCRIBE NOW! TELL YOUR FRIENDS!