- Liza, as you've always looked good for your age.
I mean, you were getting carded until you were 30.
- I know and my husband still leaves me for a younger woman.
How's that for irony?
- Would you stop feeling sorry for yourself
and listen to me?
What? No one wants to hire a 40 year old has been?
Tell 'em you're 26.
- Are you insane? Nobody's gonna believe that.
- People believe what you tell them.
- I'm gonna need some highlights.
- Oh girl. We're going way bigger than that.
(cheery music)
- You know? You and me hanging out.
It's just, I'm just worried.
She's going to think I'm.
- Gay?
- Old
Er.
- Don't worry.
I promise not to blow your cover.
I'll just be your roommate. Your older roommate,
- who I found on Craigslist.
- Craigslist? Why are you hanging out with me?
- Because you're cool.
You're my cool older roommate I found on Craigslist.
- I am cool. I lived in Williamsburg before
it was all rich kids on unicycles.
I was your coolest friend.
Remember you were the one,
the house-wife from New Jersey who went to book club
and drank Tequila Mockingbirds.
- That is a delicious cocktail
- Guess what?
I'm part of a crew now. I have bitches Maggie, and we roll.
- How exciting for you? I got into a huge fight with Phil-
(stuttering)
- Kelsey and I.
We made a middle-aged murder pact.
Oh, we're going to kill each other before we turned 40,
she just texted me poison. My insure.
- Who are you right now?
I'm never going to find another gallery at this age.
- I completely understand what you're going through.
- No, you don't.
You completely obsessed with living this 26 year old life.
- Maggie, Me passing as younger was your idea.
- Yeah, to find a job,
Not a crew or some Tiger Beat cover of a boyfriend.
- He's actually very mature.
- I needed that show Liza.
- I know.
- Do you?
I don't know what you know,
and what you've completely forgotten.
What the hell are you doing?
- Trying to win you back.
Maggie, without you, I'd be back in Jersey drinking
Bridget Jones daiquiris with my book club.
I owe you my life, my annoying 26 year old life.
I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you last night.
- Hard to make new friends.
- It's harder to lose old ones.
- You're not losing me.
I can't believe you Pretty Woman-sed me.
- I can't believe I'm Richard Gere and you're Julia Roberts.
I always thought it'd be the other way around.
- I feel like I can never get enough of you.
- I know
- We should just like talk all night.
- Yes. Oh my god, yes.
- Oh.
- There I did it, I finally got to kiss
the person I wanted to.
- That was nice.
- I know.
- I haven't never been this sexually in sync
with someone before.
Don't you agree that we're sexually in sync?
and that is why that I decided last night,
I am ready to be gender monogamous.
- Monogo-what now? What, with me?
- Yes, from this point on,
you'll be the only woman that I sleep with.
- You make me feel so special,
you remind me of myself when I was your age,
but you need to learn to protect your heart.
- Hi. Hey, can we hang out later?
I'm kind of in the middle of a project.
- No, this is important.
Maggie. I,
I ran into an old friend that I haven't seen in like forever
and we hooked up.
- Oh,
okay.
What's her name?
- His name is Max.
- Oh.
- He's nice. And he's, he's sweet
and he's cute as a little button.
(stuttering)
But god, he's so traditional, you know,
I mentioned a throuple and he said
that he didn't want to share me,
which, I mean, that's 100% adorable,
but I don't know. This whole thing is just so not me.
- Lauren. I mean this with love,
stop trying to be so interesting.
- Excuse me.
- Just date the guy.
- What really?
- Yeah.
- You're going to be okay. Right?
- I think so.
So,
where were we.
- Loving your hat today.
- Malkie! Hi!
I love yours too.
- It's actually from my boutique on Bedford.
Hey, I'm actually hosting a little event
at the boutique tomorrow night
to celebrate our new spring line.
Would you want to come?
- I'd love to.
I have a confession to make,
I must be off my game or something because
I kind of missed a few things.
I thought you were gay
and not Orthodox.
- Well, why can't I be both?
I'm what you might call.
An ortho day.
- Well, well, well look who it is.
- Hey. Maggie, This is one of my best friends Sarah.
- Also the ex.
- Sarah is the one I was telling you about
who owns the Hallel spiritual spot on Ken Street
- It's just a place for our group to gather at night.
Light Some candles, splash around.
It's very exclusive.
- Sounds nice.
- I'm not sure we're really supposed to be here.
- You know, I think there's Malkie and Sarah
I'm going in.
(sensual music)
(yelling and screaming)
- That was the juiciest brisket I have ever eaten.
- We should host every Sapphic Shabbat here.
- Let's make a toast to our Sabbath queen.
(cheering)
- Maggie!
- You should come to our self renewal retreat
- Well, what are you doing for the high holidays?
- We have the most amazing cantor
she's family.
- You know, I just don't think I can do this.
- Do what?
- You know Malkie, I realized tonight
that I don't know if I'm ready for like
a real relationship and all that it comes with
The new food, the new friends.
I mean, they'd booked up my weekends for, like,
the next three years.
- I know they can be a lot,
- But that's the thing! It's not them.
It's just that I don't fly in a lesbian flock.
I'm more of a lone owl.
- So what now?
- Well, we always have our tomato patch
- Maggie,
- Liza,
- Without you I would be living in Michelle's pool house
and folding boxer briefs at Nordstrom.
You've given me a home
and allowed me to make a better life
for myself than the one I had.
I will never be able to pay you back.
- You don't have to,
You're family.
- I know, but please,
Just let me say this.
Thank you.
- I love you.
I need to know that I keep a secret stash
in the Halloween pumpkin in my room.
- A secret stash of what?
- Bail money.
- Oh boy.
- Maggie!
What a surprise
- Not as surprised as I am.
- Oh, Mags, I didn't want you to find out this way.
I'm sorry. This must look so bad.
- That's my painting.
- And he gave it to me.
I put my mark on it and now it's mine.
That's the point of the whole show.
No.
Oh my God.
- There
Now it's mine again.
- Are you Maggie Amato?
- Yeah.
- I can't believe we've never met.
If I give you my card,
Would you promise to call me or text me
- Absolutely
You got a little something right here
Oh no, no, no, no.
Sorry.
I think she is a mustache.
- Well, everybody's got a little peach fuzz.
- And this is not a peach.
This is a coconut.
- Can I ask you to do something kind of intimate?
Will you shave me?
- I have literally not thought of anything else
since the moment we met
- Wait, wait, what are you doing?
- I'm shaving you.
- I meant my pussy.
- This is my roommate, Josh.
And that's Maggie.
- Malkie.
- What is this?
- You got something to say to me?
Why don't you say it to my face?
- You're a middle-aged woman.
who's scared to let anyone in.
You love the fun of the chase,
but you never want to get real.
Lauren is Malkie's new girlfriend.
- Oh, Maggie.
- And she said I had issues.
Do you think I have issues?
- We're all scared to put our hearts out there,
but the good things only happen when we risk letting
the bad stuff happen too.
- I can do the work.
(cheerful music)
What do you think?
- I love it.
I tried really hard for a year, but it's expensive.
So I had to give up,
- Wait, you want to have a baby?
- Yeah.
- When were you planning on telling me this?
- I guess I was just really worried about
how you are going to react.
- Oh well,
I'm blindsided.
- Well I'm disappointed.
- So there's no way you getting past this thing with Malkie?
- Well,
She really wants a baby,
and I'm really high on a weeknight and happy that way.
- Hi there. Beth remember?
- Yeah. Maggie. How you doing?
You seem great, but I'm beyond help.
- I also teach privates.
- Oh?
- Does that?
- That was pretty good.
Maybe we could speed things up a little bit.
- Well maybe if you're-
- I saw the prescription in the bathroom.
- Oh God, can you pretend that you didn't.
- No, It's fine.
It's just that, that shit's loaded with chemicals
and you should really try a natural anti-fungal.
- Like what?
Garlic?
- Yes.
- Oh my God. You're crazy.
- It's as if someone is toasting an everything bagel,
- Is there something in the oven?
- Not exactly.
- Oh, it's like a garlic knot.
- It's me. I'm the garlic.
Beth stuck a whole clove up my pussy.
- It's plant medicine.
(laughter)
- Maggie you are very-
- Gay.
- People are fluid.
There's an attraction to someone
who cares what you are and what they are except,
- Attracted.
- You bi now?
- Please. I'm still a Kinsey nine.
- It only goes up to six
- Liza don't straight-splain sexuality to me.
Haven't you ever had a talent crush?
- Not a big enough one to defect.
- I find you charming and handsome and talented,
but I'm gay. I promise you like turbo gay.
- Why don't we enjoy our drink?
Have a wonderful dinner and you can come back to my loft.
You'll change your mind.
You all do.
- You all?
- What can I say,
I'm a flipper?
- Excuse me.
- I flipped you, didn't I?
- Wow. But guess what?
- I'm a flipper too.
- You have your eye on anything tonight?
- Sure do.
Coming?
- Where do I sign?
- Hey, there she is.
Maggie. This is my wife. Kamila.
- How are you, sweet pea?
- I remember you.
- We're going to be seeing a lot more of her
because she's teaching here now.
- That's terrific news.
- What are you doing tomorrow night?
Because my wife would love to cook for you.
You remember Kamila
- To Maggie's first class.
- Mazel tov
- I found an old flyer for that show online.
What was it called? Gypsies, Trannies and Thieves.
- Okay. People context is important here
Maggie was breaking new ground at the time.
- Thank you Jean.
I mean, obviously those terms are not politically correct,
but art's a reflection of when it's made.
All right, so let's move on.
(derisive laughing)
- Professor, what do you call that one?
- That's called my wife.
- Excuse me.
- Cass, I can explain.
We're doing a sculpture for you, of her, her bust.
- Fine.
Fine.
- Have you seen these?
look, I'm your ally here,
but if the students turn on you.
- Can you stop these?
- Whoa, what are you talking about?
- Look at these tweets.
I read nicer things about me on the wall,
in the men's room in high school.
I mean, at least they were more accurate.
- Wait, transphobic?
You're not transphobic.
- This was all you, you set me up.
- You're fired. You brought this on yourself.
- Hey, what are you doing with that sign?
- Maggie Amato's been canceled
and not just to show the person.
Have you read what they been saying about her on Twitter?
- I won't stay. If you don't want me to.
I just came to say, how very sorry
I am for the way I behaved.
I don't know what came over me.
- Well, it wasn't your wife.
That's for damn sure.
- For the record. Ex-wife.
We're separating.
- Oh, good morning Cass.
- Listen, Maggie.
Now that your career is blowing up,
Thanks in no small part to yours, truly.
I'd like my sculpture back.
- I'm not sending the sculpture.
- Fine, just bring it to dinner then.
- Wait, did I miss an invitation.
- For what.
- Dinner?
- Oh.
Yeah, sure.
I'll have dinner with you.
I wanted to be an artist, but I didn't have the guts.
So I got into teaching instead.
- It's never too late
I mean, you just have to be fearless.
I really like you to know that.
- I really like you too.
- Hey, Don't forget.
Be fearless.
Is everything okay?
- Yeah.
- What was that for?
- Just taking your advice.
Being fearless.
- When love finally bites you in the ass,
there ain't nothing you can do about it.
- Oh, wait a minute.
Did I just hear you say you're in love?
- You know what they say about love and hate?
It's two sides of the same coin and yeah,
I guess that means there's gotta be something there
- To Maggie, in love!
- And miserable for the rest of my life.