Oh sh*t!
Huuh!
Oh my God!
He just got stabbed in the f*cking face!
Hi, I'm Lucy.
Dain
Elias
Kya
Andy
And I've never seen
never seen
'Mission: Impossible.'
It's American 'James Bond.'
He is an indestructible man.
And that's just not possible.
But this guy's a super spy,
so he can do it.
A mission that's impossible?
...
Love.
They always get the hot chicks.
Tom Cruise is probably the hero.
I bet he has to run a lot.
[running]
['James Bond' theme song]
No, that's 'James Bond.' Wait.
['Mission: Impossible' theme song]
[theme song confirmed]
He is talking to someone while he is...
trying to have sex with a woman.
Oh, they got a lot of spies planted.
Classic.
[elevator starts]
Hey?!
Jack, what are you doing?
Not doing anything.
Jack doesn't know what he's doing.
Jack, what are you doing?
He's not doing anything.
Cut the power, Jack.
Come on, Jack.
Jack is done.
Jack...Jack might die.
Come on, Jack.
Jack! Jack!
Is he gonna die?!
Oh sh*t!
Huuh!
Oh my God!
Oooo!
Jack died.
He just got stabbed in the f*cking face.
Yo, this feels like I'm watching 'Titanic.'
Jack, come back.
He was doomed by his name.
Jack?
Jack, like, missed an
important day in spy school.
He died getting yelled at.
That's so sad.
It was also one of those things
where he was looking up at
the thing that was going to kill him.
Then he got in the face
with metal.
He has my headset on
Oh, and he has a CD/DVD player.
This is very important.
There's probably some data.
What's that? Windows '95?
[laughs]
That's pathetic. I'm sorry.
If you're a spy,
you should not have a rat fear.
Get over it!
This far.
And he's making a little snow angel.
[snow angel-ing]
See, no one's yelling at him
the way they were yelling at Jack.
What are you struggling for?
This is your job!
I've never seen sweat fall through
glasses like that.
What?
???
Like, you don't see how he could
even do that,
'cause one second he's like this.
And yet he caught his own tear.
Which would mean he would have
to do something like
this.
He's now pulling him up.
Do not tell me the rope
is going to fray.
I feel like the thing is going to pop.
Get moving.
Oh God!
Ok, now he's good.
He's good, he's good, he's good.
Merci.
Ahh! They dropped the knife!
Come on.
Why did he even have a knife in his hand?
Look at God.
I'm still not convinced that's possible.
But I guess that's the name of the movie.
Tom Cruise has to be clinging
to the side of something
in every one of his movies, right?
[extreme clinging]
That's, like, part of his contract?
What's he gonna do?
He's gonna get hit.
[honk, honk]
Get off the side of that high speed train
in a tunnel.
[honk, honk]
This is the longest train tunnel in the world.
There's a train
and, like, the helicopter is, like,
perfectly gliding with the train.
Oh, sh*t. He's trying to kill him with this sh*t.
So how does he have that precision?
'Cause there's no—no f*cking way.
Ok, so Tom Cruise put gum on it...
he was able to jump off of it...
exploding, moving helicopter...
to jump on to a moving train.
... What?
Ooo.
I felt that.
Tom Cruise isn't gonna die.
Not only does he defy logic,
The, the, the, the,
the situations that he is in.
Like, they just get away with things.
But this was way too—
like, come on, he should've died.
High marks for pacing
and just action-packed adrenaline.
Lower marks for CGI.
Wait, there's 5 more?!
This message
will self-destruct in 5 seconds.
5...
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BOOM!