(bright music)
- I remember years ago, I was working with a fitness trainer
and before she ever gave me a workout plan, she said,
"Let's work on your posture."
I was like, "What? I wanna work on my thighs."
She said, "No, I want you to pull your shoulders back more
and carry yourself with more confidence."
She even said, "I want you to sit in your car
with perfect posture
and adjust the rear view mirror for that posture."
She said, "If you suddenly can't see
out the back of the car,
don't adjust the mirror, adjust you."
I'm Terri Savelle Foy, by the way,
your Cheerleader of Dreams,
and today I wanna talk about
seven signs you could be showing a lack of confidence
or your insecurity.
And I'm not gonna leave you hanging,
I'm gonna give you the greatest tip
I have ever learned to build my confidence.
Now, when I say you're showing insecurity,
yes, that means body language like I just shared.
But there's other signs that you may not realize
are giving the signal of insecurity.
It's not just the lack of eye contact
or the dead fish handshake. (chuckles softly)
No, in fact, I came across an article from Barrie Davenport
about some of these signs and I found it so interesting
that I'm just gonna point out some of them
and see if you recognize any of them in you
'cause I know I have.
Okay, number one is you have anxiety.
This is something I have dealt with for years
but I found out anxiety stems from fear.
Fear does not come from God.
See, when you feel anxious about something,
it's usually because
you're unsure of what the outcome will be.
Well, that's why I love the fact that God said, "Fear not."
365 times in the Bible.
That's one for every day you wake up, God saying,
"Fear not, there's nothing to fear."
Think about that.
Another sign, number two is
you're unable to accept compliments.
Maybe you identify with this one, I know I do.
Now when a confident person receives a compliment,
they simply say, "Thank you, I appreciate that."
An insecure person rejects the compliment saying,
"What? Are you kidding me?
I look terrible. I've had this outfit for years."
That's totally me.
Practice saying thank you, and that's it.
Number three, you neglect yourself.
I think about that scene in "Just Go With It"
where Jennifer Aniston's sitting in the chair
and he says, "There's only one word for this head, neglect."
(chuckles loudly) I love that line.
But people lacking in confidence
don't take the time to just really fix up.
And I'm not saying you have to wear as much mascara as I do,
'cause who does that?
But maybe just without even realizing why
you started doing this, you start to think things like,
what's the point, you know?
Or I don't know, you forget about it,
you just give up on it.
But let me just remind you
that looking good makes you feel good.
So do something to make you feel better
about your physical appearance.
Number four is you're unwilling to take on challenges.
You may feel like trying something new and challenging
isn't even worth the effort
because you've already convinced yourself
that you're gonna fail.
So why even put yourself out there, right?
Well, it could be a new job, a career change,
starting your own YouTube channel,
a new relationship, a new city.
So you just settle in a comfortable place.
You don't wanna risk failing
because that would cause you
to feel even more of a lack of confidence.
I say, start with something small.
You know, we did 30 day challenges last month,
build your confidence just a little at a time.
Okay, number five is you expect very little out of life.
You've convinced yourself that you're different
from whatever successful people are born with,
and you stop dreaming or setting any goals for yourself.
But see God is the one who said,
"Where there is no vision, the people perish."
Getting a vision for your life
and setting goals actually builds your confidence.
In fact, in my free download this week,
I want you to print it off or put it on your phone,
it's the seven self image boosting scriptures
that I've put together for you.
And I want you to just set an alarm on your phone
as a reminder to read them out loud
every day for seven days, trust me on this.
You might be like, why?
Because you believe your own self more than anyone.
And you need to hear yourself speaking God's word to you.
So I want you to click the link in the description
and get these seven scriptures right now.
You got it? Okay.
Number six is you blame others.
The reason people with low confidence tend to blame others
for where they are in life is
because it removes the responsibility
from them to change their lives.
In fact, I heard somebody define the word blame
as to be lame, (chuckles loudly) that was kinda funny.
But this mindset actually causes you
to take on a victim mentality,
it makes you feel like you have no control over your life.
Well, not anymore.
Things are changing starting today.
In fact, I'm gonna give you the greatest tip
I've ever learned to improve my self image, okay?
Number seven is you're pessimistic.
You know, when we lack confidence or have low self-esteem,
we tend to be critical and negative over everything.
We put other people down
who are doing something with their lives,
we critique every person on social media.
Bottom line is we feel so negative about ourselves
that we have a hard time being positive about anything.
So did you identify with any of these seven signs
that just show a lack of confidence?
I have had to overcome several of them
and I still do from time to time.
But did you know that
you can literally rewire your brain at any age?
You can change.
You can change your thoughts about yourself starting today.
In fact, I'm gonna give you the greatest tip
I ever learned to build my confidence.
So I learned this years and years ago
that you don't change your thoughts
by thinking other thoughts.
You change your thoughts by speaking.
Now, let me give you an example, it'll make sense.
If I asked you to subtract 43,510 from 59,239,
and let's just say you're doing this crazy math problem
in your head, and then suddenly,
I interrupt you and say,
"Hey, can you give me directions to your house?"
You have to stop the math in your head
to hear what your mouth has to say
to give directions, right?
Does that make sense?
Well, this is how you interrupt negative thoughts
in your head that tell you you're not enough,
you're not qualified, you're different,
success doesn't belong to you.
You shut those thoughts up
by speaking the truth from God's word.
So that's why your free download this week
is my seven self-image boosting scriptures
that I want you to speak out loud.
Why?
Again, because your words are the most influential words
in your life and you need to hear yourself speak 'em out.
I heard someone say the other day
that if you ask a bank teller,
how do they spot a counterfeit bill?
You know what they'll tell you?
They aren't trained to spot a fake
by studying what a fake bill looks and feels like.
No, they are trained to study
what a real bill looks and feels like,
they're trained in the truth, not in deception.
So think about that.
They identify a counterfeit,
not by studying and studying and studying the counterfeit.
No, they thoroughly study the real thing, the truth.
Well, God's word is the real thing.
Jesus is the way, the truth, the life, right?
And he said in Jeremiah 17:7, "Blessed is the one
who trust in the Lord whose confidence is in him."
So you are gonna love these seven scriptures
from God's word to help you pull your shoulders back,
hold your head up and walk with confidence to your dreams.
Thank you for watching.
I'm cheering you on to live your dreams.
(bright music)
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And remember, I'm cheering you on to live your dreams.