Hey everyone, and welcome to TopThink.
Today, we are going to learn about 7 conversation starters that always work.
Now, let’s begin 1.
Personal Interest Talking to strangers can be awkward and intimidating.
Every time you open your mouth, you’re taking a risk.
You’re making yourself vulnerable with no idea how the other person is going to react.
Luckily, there are several reliable conversation starters you can use to increase your odds
of making a new connection.
One of the easiest ways to start a conversation is to take a genuine interest in the people
you meet.
In other words, ask them a personal question.
People like to discuss their own lives.
They want to share their experiences.
They want to stand in the spotlight.
By expressing genuine interest in their lives, you are putting this person center stage,
giving them the freedom to express their thoughts and ideas.
But there is one important thing to keep in mind.
When you ask a personal question, the conversation doesn’t stop there.
There’s still more work to do if you’re hoping to make a new friend or meet a potential
partner.
Most importantly, you also need to actively listen to their answers.
Really try to understand their ideas and feelings.
Once they’re finished talking, ask a thoughtful, open-ended question to keep the conversation
moving.
This back and forth will show the other person that you are interested in their lives and
looking for a genuine connection.
2.
Sharing Problems In most social settings, problems bring people
closer together.
Let’s say you’re talking to a new person in a crowded room.
The room is so loud and busy that you can hardly hear the sound of your own voice.
You may think this overwhelming environment is sabotaging your chances of meeting someone
new.
But an uncomfortable setting can actually improve your chances of building a connection.
Everyone else in the room is facing the same problem.
So, use that communal struggle to your advantage.
Open a conversation by talking about a frustrating venue, an unsatisfying meal, or a boring event.
Chances are, other people feel the same way.
They may be relieved to know that someone shares their emotions.
When people are unsatisfied or bored, they naturally crave an outlet for their emotions.
They want someone to complain to — someone who really understands their frustrations.
While it’s not the happiest way to start a conversation, mutual suffering can spark
a connection in no time.
3.
Common Ground When meeting a new person, think of something
basic the two of you have in common.
It could be an accessory, an accent, an article of clothing — anything that links the two
of you together.
Each commonality creates an opportunity to spark a connection.
Not only does it give you something to talk about, but it improves your chances of leaving
a strong first impression.
Why?
Because we like people who are similar to us.
If someone shares our features or our sense of style, we unconsciously view that person
in a more positive light.
So, lead with your commonalities.
Draw attention to the little things you share and use those little things to build a deeper
connection.
If you have one thing in common, you might have two things in common.
Or three, or four.
But all you need is one to get a conversation going.
Find common ground, and the rest of the conversation will come naturally.
4.
Appropriate Humor Humor is one of the easiest ways to get someone’s
attention.
Almost everyone is drawn to a good joke or a funny observation, so use your sense of
humor to meet new people.
For example, try posing a funny question that triggers a lighthearted back and further.
This kind of banter is one of the best ways to bond with new people.
As you throw comments back and forth, you can show off your wit and sense of humor while
breaking down personal walls.
Laughter is one of the quickest ways to someone’s heart, so don’t be afraid to let your humor
do the talking.
If you choose this approach, remember to tailor your comments to your environment.
Before you open your mouth, consider whether your question is appropriate in this context.
For example, if you’re trying to impress somebody at work, you shouldn’t lead with
a dirty joke.
On the other hand, if you’re out on the town, a dry, professional joke isn’t going
to turn any heads.
Ultimately, whatever question you choose sets the tone of the conversation.
If you want to be funny and flirty, ask a funny and flirty question.
If you want to be serious and professional, your question should reflect your state of
mind.
If humor doesn’t come naturally to you, this conversation starter may not be right
for you.
Because confidence is the key to any funny introduction.
If people think you’re nervous, people aren’t going to respond the way you want them to.
But if you’re confident and secure, a funny joke will always grab people’s attention.
5.
Strategic Favors With the right conversation starter, it’s
easy to get on someone’s good side.
Start by asking for help with something small and simple.
Pick something anybody could do, like telling the time or giving directions.
Asking for help is a fantastic ice breaker because it creates a feeling of necessity.
It not only gives you a good reason to start a conversation, but it also creates an instant
connection between you and the people you meet.
Whenever we do small favors for each other, we instantly feel more connected.
Helping someone in need requires use to cross a small but significant personal boundary.
As soon as they tell you the time or give you directions, you’re no longer strangers.
You’re no longer anonymous facing disappearing into the crowd.
Instead, you are two people who are willing to help one another, and that mutual connection
acts as a foundation for a stronger bond.
Once you’ve laid a foundation, it’s much easier to grow your new friendship.
You can express gratitude, ask questions, or find some small way to repay their favor.
Each of these gestures shows what kind of person you are and deepens your unconscious
connection.
But the opposite is true too.
Instead of asking for help, you can also create fast connections by offering to help someone
in need.
If someone looks lost, for example, volunteer your services.
Ask if they need help finding what they’re looking for.
Just like that, you’re started a conversation.
So, the next time you want to meet someone new, open the conversation with a favor.
Ask for a small, manageable favor, or offer your help to someone in need.
Either way, you can use this trick to connect with almost everyone you meet.
6.
The Hypothetical Game If you want to start a conversation with a
stranger, try to engage their brain from the first minute you meet.
There are many different strategies you can use to grab someone’s attention, but one
of the easiest is to play the hypothetical game.
The rules of the hypothetical game are simple.
Imagine a hypothetical situation.
Maybe you’re trapped on a desert island.
Maybe you wake up one morning and realize you’re a billionaire.
Once you’re created a hypothetical situation, turn that situation into an easy ice breaker:
“If you had a billion dollars, what would you do?”
Hypothetical questions are foolproof ice breakers for almost any occasion.
Whether you’re networking at a conference or meeting friends at a party, a good hypothetical
will interest almost anyone you meet.
Most of the time, you can actually learn about someone’s personality by asking hypothetical
questions.
Let’s say your hypothetical question was: “if you were trapped on a desert island,
what would you bring?”
If someone brings rope or flint, they may have a serious and practical personality.
But if they bring their cat or a cup of coffee, they may be a more whimsical and lighthearted
person.
That’s the beauty of hypothetical situations.
There are no wrong answers.
You can be serious, funny, or downright ridiculous.
So, go with the flow and adapt to the other person’s answers.
If they say something funny, you should say something funny too.
But if they’re serious and analytical, try your best to get on their level.
In either case, hypotheticals create easy opportunities for follow-up questions, which
allow you to deepen your connection.
Whatever they answer, ask them why?
Why would you bring your cat to a desert island, or spend a billion dollars on a skyscraper
made of chocolate?
Every question, serious or funny, brings the two of you closer together.
They reveal our quirks, express our personalities, and create easy opportunities for new connections.
Play the hypothetical game, and you can start a conversation with just about anyone.
7.
Respectful Compliments Everyone wants to hear something nice about
themselves.
We all want to be impressive, respected, and desirable to the people around us.
We want to hear others appreciate our best qualities.
So, if you want to make an immediate impression on the people you meet, open the conversation
with a genuine compliment.
But keep this in mind: there are good compliments and bad compliments, especially if you’re
meeting someone for the first time.
Complimenting a stranger can be a little tricky at first, but when you get the hang of it,
this trick will become an easy ice breaker for any occasion.
So, how can you tell the difference between a good compliment and a bad compliment?
Good compliments bring attention to someone’s best qualities without overstepping any personal
boundaries.
For example, you shouldn’t open a conversation by telling someone how attractive they are.
Think about how that sounds coming from a complete stranger.
This person has no idea what your intentions are or what kind of person you may be.
By opening the conversation in an overtly romantic way, you’re bound to make a negative
first impression.
Instead, aim for a compliment that is respectful, specific, and positive.
Remember: your compliment should make this person feel good about themselves.
That should be your ultimate goal anytime you start a conversation.
Make the other person feel good about themselves, and they will immediately become more receptive
to you.
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