MY NEXT GUEST TONIGHT IS A VERY
FUNNY GUY WHO RECENTLY WON AN
EMMY AWARD FOR HIS STANDUP
SPECIAL, "TALKING FOR CLAPPING."
HE PERFORMED LAST NIGHT AT THE
NEW YORK COMEDY FESTIVAL.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, PLEASE
WELCOME PATTON OSWALT!
♪ ♪ ♪
( APPLAUSE )
>> OH, HI.
>> Stephen: THANKS FOR BEING
HERE.
>> THANKS FOR HAVING ME.
>> Stephen: HOW ARE YOU DOING?
>> AAAHH... I'M OKAY.
YOU KNOW, IT'S-- IT'S IT'S
WEIRD.
DOING-- LIKE, ME SITTING HERE
NOW TALKING TO YOU, THIS PART
VERY EASY.
AND THEN, ALSO, STAYING HOME
CURLED UP IN THE FETAL POSITION
AND NOT LEAVING FOR DAYS, SUPER
EASY.
( LAUGHTER ).
>> Stephen: THERE MIGHT BE A
FEW PEOPLE OUT THERE, JUST TO
EXPLAIN, WHO-- THAT, SADLY, SIX
MONTHS AGO YOU LOST YOUR WIFE
MICHELLE.
>> YES, YES.
>> Stephen: FOR THE PEOPLE WHO
DON'T KNOW THAT, NOW YOU ARE--
YOU'VE BEEN VERY PUBLIC ABOUT
IT, ABOUT YOUR GRIEF, IN WAYS
THAT I THINK HAS BEEN VERY
APPRECIATED BY PEOPLE WHO HAVE
EXPERIENCED GRIEF BECAUSE THERE
ARE A LOT OF TIMES PEOPLE DON'T
TALK ABOUT IT, AND THEY DON'T
WANT TO HEAR IT SOMETIMES
BECAUSE THEY FEEL ALMOST LIKE
IT'S CONTAGIOUS.
IT'S SO TERRIBLE FOR PEOPLE TO
CONTEMPLATE, BUT YOU SHARING
WITH OTHER PEOPLE I THINK HAS
BEEN A BEAUTIFUL GIFT FOR
SOMEONE TO GIVE TO KNOW THAT
OTHER PEOPLE ARE NOT ALONE.
SO THANK YOU FOR THAT.
>> I MEAN, IT'S A--
( APPLAUSE )
THANK YOU.
I THINK-- I THINK IT'S A WAY FOR
ME TO-- WHEN YOU SAID, "IT FEELS
CONTAGIOUS.
IT FEELS LIKE YOU'VE SUMMONED
THIS VIRUS AND YOU'VE BECOME
THIS AVATAR OF LOSS, TO KIND OF
DESUMMON IT, THE MORE YOU TALK
OPENLY ABOUT WHAT IT IS AND PUT
MORE LIGHT ON TO IT, PEOPLE CAN
SEE ALL THE ANGLES AND SAY, "OH,
OKAY, THAT IS HORRIBLE, BUT
THERE'S LIFE ON EITHER SIDE OF
IT, AND IT'S SOMEHOW
MANAGEABLE."
I'VE HEARD FROM PEOPLE THAT HAVE
GONE THROUGH UNBELIEVABLE-- LIKE
LOSS THAT I CAN'T EVEN WRAP MY
HEAD AROUND IN THE DEPTHS OF MY
LOSS.
BUT YOU CAN-- AND THERE ARE
THESE REALLY LONG MESSAGES THAT
I'LL GET.
AND YOU REALIZE THE LENGTH OF
THE MESSAGE IS THEM BEGINNING TO
TALK ABOUT IT AND WRITE ABOUT
IT, AND THEN IT JUST COMES
POURING OUT.
AND IT'S-- THERE'S JUST-- IF YOU
DON'T TALK ABOUT IT, THEN GRIEF
REALLY GETS TO SET UP AND
FORTIFY ITS POSITIONS INSIDE OF
YOU AND BEGIN TO IMMOBILIZE YOU.
BUT THE MORE YOU TALK, THE MORE
YOU EXPOSE IT TO THE AIR AND TO
THE LIGHT THEN, YOU KNOW, GRIEF
DOESN'T GET A CHANCE TO ORGANIZE
ITSELF, AND THEN YOU CAN MAYBE
MOVE ON A LITTLE BETTER AND A
LITTLE EASIER.
THAT'S BEEN MY EXPERIENCE IN
THESE SIX MONTHS.
>> Stephen: WELL, HOW IS-- YOU
KNOW, HAVE BEEN AWAY FROM
PERFORMING AND NOW YOU'RE COMING
BACK TO PERFORMING.
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: HOW HAS THAT BEEN?
I MUST IMAGINE WHEN YOU FIRST
CONSIDERED COMING TO DO COMEDY,
THAT'S MUST HAVE BEEN A WEIRD
FEELING TO DO.
>> IT WAS REALLY-- IT WAS REALLY
WEIRD, THE PROCESS OF GETTING TO
DO THE SHOW.
AGAIN, ONCE I GET ON STAGE AND
START TALKING, IT WEIRDLY
BECOMES OKAY BECAUSE THE STAGE
WAS ALWAYS A SAFE PLACE FOR ME.
IT WAS A SAFE PLACE THAT I WAS
USED TO.
BUT IT'S THE GETTING IN THE CAR
AND DRIVING AND THINKING ABOUT
PEOPLE ARE COMING INTO A ROOM,
AND I'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS LOSS,
AND I'M GOING TO TALK-- HOW DARE
I TALK ABOUT THIS THING.
BUT THEN IN A REALLY WEIRD WAY,
IT TAKES YOU OUT OF YOUR OWN
HEAD AND YOUR OWN EGO TO GO,
WELL, WAIT A MINUTE.
EVERYONE IN THAT ROOM, EACH
INDIVIDUAL PERSON, YOU'RE ALL
MEETING AT THIS MOMENT OF-- YOU
DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY'VE BEEN
THROUGH THAT DAY OR IN THEIR
LIVES OR WHAT THEY HAVE GOING
ON.
SO IF YOU ALL MEET TOGETHER AT
THAT ONE-- WHERE YOU'RE ALL
DENYING WHATEVER IS BAD FOR JUST
AN HOUR, UP IN THE LIGHT OF
TELLING JOKES AND BEING
RIDICULOUS, THERE'S SOMETHING--
IT'S WEIRD HOW BOTH ME AND THE
AUDIENCES THAT I'VE BEEN
PERFORMING FOR, WE ALL JUST KIND
OF RISE TO THE OCCASION.
IT'S A-- IT'S A WAY TO MAKE THE
DARKNESS FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE WITH
ITSELF FOR A LITTLE BIT.
YOU KNOW?
( APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: I DO KNOW.
I DO KNOW.
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: YEAH.
GRIEF CANNOT BE FIXED.
IT CAN ONLY BE EXPERIENCED.
>> NO.
>> Stephen: UNLESS YOU ALLOW
YOURSELF TO EXPERIENCE IT, IT
WILL STAY.
>> AND IT CAN'T BE REMEDIED.
IT MUST BE ENDURED.
AND IT'S THE ENDURANCE, WEIRDLY
ENOUGH, THAT BECOMES THE REMEDY.
DOES THAT MAKE A LITTLE --
>> I DO.
>> LIKE A --
>> NO, IT'S THE ACKNOWLEDGMENT
OF IT.
IT'S LIKE A DEMON THAT MUST BE
NAMED AND THEN IT CAN GO.
>> YEAH, IF YOU CAN NAME IT, YOU
CAN MANAGE IT.
YOU CAN MOCK IT, YOU CAN MANAGE
IT.
I'M QUOTING TODD GLASS RIGHT
THERE.
BUT IF YOU CAN MOCK IT YOU CAN
MANAGE IT.
IT ROBS IT OF ITS POWER.
>> Stephen: THE DEVIL CANNOT
IGNORE MOCKERY.
>> OH, YEAH.
NOT TOO CRAZY ABOUT-- IF YOU'RE
BEING ENTERTAINED OR LAUGHING AT
WHAT IS SUPPOSED TO BE
TERRIFYING YOU, IT JUST TAKES
ALL OF ITS STRENGTH AWAY.
>> Stephen: YOU CAN'T LAUGH
AND BE AFRAID AT THE SAME TIME
IS WHAT I LIKE TO SAY.
>> YES, EXACTLY.
>> Stephen: YOU'RE NOT DOING
THIS ALONE.
>> UNLESS YOU'RE ON BATH SALT S.
>> Stephen: THAT IS TRUE.
>> THEN YOU CAN DO BOTH.
>> Stephen: THEN YOUR LAUGHTER
IS ACTUALLY TERRIFYING.
>> YES.
WHOA!
SHOULD I TAKE BATH SALTS?
SORRY.
>> Stephen: OR TAKE A BATH.
ONE OF THOSE TWO.
>> THAT WILL BE GOOD.
>> Stephen: YOU AND YOUR WIFE
MICHELLE HAVE A DAUGHTER, ALICE,
WHO YOU ARE RAISING.
>> YES.
>> Stephen: ANDA WHAT IS THAT
EXPERIENCE LIKE FOR YOU?
IS SHE HELPING YOU?
>> OH, SHE'S-- MY DAUGHTER IS
HELPING ME IMMEASURABLY WITH
THIS, WITH THE WAY THAT WE--
WHEN YOU SEE SOMEONE WHO IN YOUR
MIND, "OH, SHE'S ONLY SEVEN.
I'M THE-- I'M THE 47-YEAR-OLD
HERE.
I'M THE WISE ONE."
BUT YOU REALIZE WHEN YOU'RE--
WHEN THEY'RE YOUNGER THEY HAVE
SO MUCH MORE RESILIENCE THAN YOU
DO BECAUSE-- BECAUSE THEY'VE
EXPERIENCED LESS OF THE WORLD,
AND BECAUSE THEY'RE KIND OF
CREATING THE WORLD AS THEY GO
ALONG, THAT GRIEF-- LET'S LIKE
GRIEF HAS BEEN INTRODUCED TO
THEM IN A WORLD THAT THEY
HAVEN'T YET COMPLETED.
SO IT'S WAY EASIER FOR THEM TO
GO, "I'M JUST GOING TO PLACE
GRIEF OVER HERE BECAUSE I HAVE
ALL THIS OTHER COOL STUFF THAT
I'M STILL CONSTRUCTING AND
REFORMING."
TO GET TO SEE THAT IS A
REMINDER, AGAIN, TO ME, TO GET
OUT OF YOUR OWN HEAD.
KIND OF REVERSE YOUR VALENCES
AND PUT GRIEF WHERE YOU WANT IT
TO BE, NOT WHERE IT WANTS YOU TO
BE.
AND MY SEVEN-YEAR-OLD IS SHOWING
ME HOW TO DO THAT IT'S PRETTY
INCREDIBLE.
>> Stephen: YEAH THAT'S A
GREAT GIFT.
THAT'S A GREAT GIFT.
>> IT IS.
>> Stephen: HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN
TO HER WHO DONALD TRUMP IS?
( LAUGHTER )
>> I SHOW HER THE CANTINA SCENE
IN "STAR WARS."
( LAUGHTER )
AND THEN I GO, "IMAGINE A
CREATURE THEY HAD TO KICK OUT,
AND THAT'S-- FOR BEING TOO
BELLIGERENT AND TOO, YOU KNOW--
HE WAS BEING--
( APPLAUSE )
HE WAS SAYING-- HE WAS SAYING--
HE WAS SAYING RACIST STUFF ABOUT
GUN DARKS, AND THEY'RE SAYING
'WE'RE JUST TRYING TO HAVE A
DRINK HERE.
PLEASE."
WEIRDLY, AND THIS IS GOING TO
SOUND A LITTLE CHEESY, YOU KNOW
WHAT'S BEEN HELPING RAISE MY
DAUGHTER IS HAVING HILLARY TO
POINT AT ON TV, AND GO, LOOK,
THERE'S THIS PERSON AND--
BECAUSE I KNOW THAT YOU'RE
GETTING-- I CAN TELL HER, I KNOW
YOU'RE GETTING HIT WITH STUFF,
YOU KNOW, FEELINGS AND STUFF IN
YOUR HEAD BE, BUT SHE'S-- NOT
ONLY HAS SHE BEEN GETTING HIT
WITH THIS STUFF SINCE HE WAS A
TEENAGER, A TEENAGER, SHE'S HAD
PEOPLE COMING AFTER HER.
BUT IT'S ALL TELEVISED AND
RECORDED AND NOW, SHE HAS TO--
SHE HAS TO PROVE HERSELF TO THIS
PERSON THAT IS-- IT ISN'T EVEN
THAT HE'S AWFUL.
IT'S THAT HE IS-- HE IS THE
ARGUMENT AGAINST HIMSELF.
BUT SHE HAS TO SOMEHOW BEAT HIM.
( APPLAUSE )
YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?
WHAT'S WEIRD IS, PEOPLE THAT
SUPPORT TRUMP, SOME OF THE
THINGS THEY LIKE ABOUT TRUMP
KIND OF MAKE SENSE.
BUT THEN HE NEGATES IT.
LIKE THE THING THAT THEY-- LIKE
THEY'LL GO, "YOU KNOW WHAT'S
GREAT ABOUT TRUMP?
HE'S ANTI-P.C., AND HE JUST
SAYS-- AND NOTHING GETS TO HIM."
AND YOU'VE GOT TO GO, "STOP,
LOOK.
I UNDERSTAND THAT THAT COULD BE
A GOOD THING.
HE IS THE MOST P.C. HUMAN BEING
ON THE PLANET EXCEPT IT'S NOT
POLITICAL CORRECTNESS.
P.C. FOR HIM STANDS FOR PERSONAL
COMFORT.
IT'S ALL HIS FEELINGS.
IF YOU PISS OFF SOMEBODY ON THE
INTERNET OR TWITTER, THEY'LL
START A HASHTAG AGAINST YOU OR
WRITE AN ANGRY ESSAY.
HE WILL GO, "I WILL SEE YOU IN
COURT FOR SAYING THAT THING
ABOUT MY HAIR!
I WANT MONEY!"
HIS BRAIN, IT'S-- HIS BRAIN IS--
IT'S JUST A DESERT WHERE THINGS
ARE--
( LAUGHTER )
BARELY ALIVE.
AND THEN THERE'S THIS GIANT DARK
TOWER, AND IN NEON ARE THE
WORDS, "MY FEELINGS," AND IF
THOSE WORDS LIGHT UP, EVERYTHING
IN THE DESERT DIES, AND WE HAVE
TO START OVER AGAIN.
THAT IS HOW HIS BRAIN WORKS.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
LITERALLY HOW HIS BRAIN WORK S.
>> Stephen: FOUR DAYS, FOUR
DAYS.
>> GOD, PLEASE.
>> Stephen: PATTON THANK YOU
SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE.
THANK YOU FOR SHARING YOUR STORY
WITH US.
PEOPLE NEED TO HEAR IT.
PATTON OSWALT WILL BE PERFORMING
IN MINNESOTA ON NOVEMBER 11, AND
IN NORTH CAROLINA ON DECEMBER 3.
PATTON OSWALT, EVERYBODY!
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK