(Strong Music)
- [Dan Lok] Write this down: Stage time equals wealth time.
Stage time equals wealth time.
Every single time I get an opportunity to be on stage,
I cherish it because stage time equals what?
- [audience] Wealth time.
- [Dan] Why do you want to master public speaking?
Because of one word: leverage.
Whatever you're doing now, if you're selling one-on-one,
that's how much leverage you have.
That's the ratio.
You're restricted by, cause think, as I always say,
money earners are by-products of value creation.
You want to deliver a lot of value,
how can you be more efficient?
How can you deliver more value
to more people at the same time?
One-to-one, that's fine, but one-to-ten?
One-to-twenty?
One-to-fifty?
One-to-a hundred?
One-to-one thousand?
That's leverage.
So, by mastering this skill,
the skill of public speaking, yes,
your earning ability goes up.
Does that make sense?
Think of people, that,
how many of you actually have a little bit of,
you're afraid of public speaking?
Be honest, it's okay.
You're afraid of it.
My question is, how many opportunities have you missed out?
Because you didn't take the time to build the skill.
And imagine, if you actually have the skill,
how much more money you would have made.
How many more opportunities you
would have taken advantage of.
And for those of you who are pretty good,
you're like, you know, I'm not afraid,
but let's say your skill is okay,
but what if your skills are actually exceptional?
How much more money?
How much more success you would have?
Does that make sense?
- [audience] Yeah.
- [Dan] So, stage time equals wealth time.
So, let me give you some tips
on how to overcome stage fright.
How many of you get nervous before you go up to the stage?
Can I see a show of hands?
Before you go, how do you feel?
Just yell the answer.
How do you feel?
- [audience members speaking]
- [Dan] Okay, stomach like, uggggh.
Okay, wanna throw up, okay, yes?
- [audience members speaking]
- [Dan] Huh, anxious?
Okay, yes.
- [audience members speaking]
- [Dan] Little voice saying, "Nobody wants to hear you."
Okay, that's awesome, yeah.
By the way, I have the same fear
every time I do a meet up.
Every time I show up early at 5:00,
you know, my team is here,
seriously, my little voice,
"I wonder if you were going to show up."
And then about, you know, 30 minutes later,
people start coming in, I'm like,
phew, that's a little bit better, right?
And after 45 minutes, oh, you know,
people are sitting down, at 50-60% packed.
Oh, people actually showed up, good.
I still have the same fear, I do.
It's not like, "oh, yeah, people are going to show up."
No, no, no, it's not like that,
I have the same fear, that little voice.
Same thing.
What else? Yes.
- [audience members speaking]
- [Dan] Worry you're going to forget something.
The point of the thing, the thing you want to communicate,
the point of what you want to say, yes!
What else?
Last one, give me one.
- [audience members speaking]
- [Dan] Worry you talk too much.
And you do talk too much, by the way.
[audience laughing]
Listening, right?
The listening, I was sharing that with you.
What else?
How else do you feel?
Dev, give me one!
- [audience members speaking]
- [Dan] Huh?
- [audience members speaking]
- [Dan] Oh, don't like people looking at you.
Okay, don't like people looking at you.
Now, let me, first of all, here's what doesn't work.
The typical advice, people tell you that,
you know, you want to picture your audience
and they're naked or in their underwear.
[audience laughing]
How many of you have heard of that?
All right, okay, now.
Depends on who you're speaking to,
it could either be too exciting or too terrifying.
Both are not good, okay?
No, don't picture your audience in their underwear
or naked, it's not good, okay?
And it's not like, oh, you know, you want to drink
your green tea before, or you want to meditate.
No, no, no, I'm not talking about that.
So, let me give you three, how many?
- [audience] Three!
- [Dan] Quick mental fixes.
What I personally do.
Now, nowadays when I go up to the stage,
I don't get nervous any more.
Not one bit.
Not like even a little bit, none.
And I'll share with you why.
So, three quick mental fixes to deal with stage fright.
Number one: focus on the audience, not yourself.
If you feel anxious, if you feel anxiety,
if you don't like people looking at you,
if you're afraid you're going to say the wrong things,
you're afraid you don't sound smart enough,
you're afraid that nobody's going to show up,
you're afraid that nobody's going to listen to you,
or you're going to offend somebody,
all this stuff is what?
- [audience members speaking]
- [Dan] Yeah, it's about you.
It's all internal.
Do I look good?
Do I sound smart?
What are they going to think of me?
Are they going to like me?
It's all me, me, me, me, does that make sense?
Yeah, so stop being so selfish!
Don't be so selfish.
Focus on the audience.
Think, if your focus is external,
if, this is why I don't get nervous any more,
here's why I don't have a music stand.
Because I don't care if I say everything
that was meant to say, it was said perfectly,
that's not important for me.
Looking good is not important for me.
'Cause I focus on the audience.
That's it.
My focus is external.
Are you getting value?
Are you walking away with value?
That is it.
I don't give a fuck if you like me or not.
I truly do not care.
'Cause it's not my job!
My job is to teach and to help you grow.
If you like me, that's nice,
you might resonate with the message a little bit more,
but that's not what I'm here for.
That's not what I'm here for.
So when "them" is out of the way,
then why would I be nervous?
When my focus is not internal?
All this stuff, all the fear, all the anxiety,
it's you-you, me-me-me-me-me-me.
Kick that out of the way and just focus on
"What can I give?"
"What kind of value can I deliver?"
That's it.
Focus on that, the fear disappears.
It's all gone.
You want to feel nervous, you won't.
Because it doesn't matter.
And that's why I break all the rules.
You know, in public speaking, Toastmasters.
You know, hands, don't put them in your pockets,
you're not supposed to use profanity,
you're not supposed to do this,
all these rules, I don't give a damn about those rules.
My rules are: Am I delivering value?
Am I being effective?
Am I being an effective communicator?
And is my message getting through?
If it is, I keep doing it.
If it doesn't work, the audience, then I will know.
Then I will stop doing it.
Everything else, I do not care.
This is all noise.
Does that make sense?
- [audience] Yes.
- [Dan] Yeah, so, don't focus on yourself,
focus on the audience.
Focus on the audience.
What's the objective?
Why are you even there?
Why, what gives you the right to be on the stage?
What are you there to do?
If that is clear, everything else is easy.
Yes?
- [audience] Yes.
- [Dan] So, this little ritual that I go through myself.
Now, every time, how many of you have been with me
more than three, six months?
Yeah.
Okay, you notice, every time before we start,
where am I?
- [audience members speaking]
- [Dan] I'm in that room, usually.
That's, I call it my green room.
I'm not here socializing,
not that I don't want to socialize.
Afterwards, you can ask questions,
I will socialize all you want.
But before that, I need some me time.
What do I need?
- [audience] Me time.
- [Dan] I need some me time to focus.
So, let me share with you my ritual, yeah?
What I go through.
So, in that room, and this is like, pretty private stuff.
But I'll share that with you.
So, in that room, what I go through, I go through
a couple of things.
First of all, in order to not focus on myself,
to focus on the audience,
I will do a very quick visualization exercise.
And here's what I visualize: I close my eyes,
I will do it like that,
and I will visualize a big bright white light,
beaming from the sky, to me, through here,
through my forehead, my hair,
through my whole body,
so I become a big, bright, white light.
From there, then I visualize from this bright light
and it will get brighter and brighter and brighter,
and it will shhhhhhh fill the whole room.
That's what I visualize, it will fill the whole room.
And in my mind, my intention is,
I'm going to make sure everyone
who comes to my presentation, to my workshop, my speech,
every single person is going to walk away
with some kind of value.
Even though they might not agree with my message,
even though they might not like me so much,
but I guarantee, my job, my intention is,
they're going to walk away with some kind of value.
That's it.
See how that shifted all the focus off of me?
And just focus on the audience.
Once I've done that, now you can see,
I don't know if you can see it.
After just a few seconds of that,
do you see a difference in my eyes?
I don't know if you can see it.
I can sense it, okay?
Lights up.
After that, I'm in a different state, right?
Now, I need to get my, what, energy up.
Get my what?
- [audience] Energy!
- [Dan] 'Cause I you guys to be excited.
If I'm a five, you guys will be a two!
So, how do I get up to a ten?
So usually I will be jumping, jumping up and down,
my martial background, I might do
a little kickboxing, right?
I'll do a little bit of that.
Now, with jumping up and down, I will deep breathe,
deep breath, and then I will just wait.
I will just wait.
Usually I will open my arms,
because I want to be just relaxed, open.
Don't want to be like that, want to be open,
and I will just wait.
And then, as whoever is introducing me,
let's say Steven is introducing me, right?
Now, he is talking, he is talking, I'm there,
you won't see it, but I'm there, jumping.
I'm going, I'm going, and then,
what I do is, I will make the switch.
What did I do?
- [Audience] Switch.
- [Dan] Make the switch.
Be able to change my state.
Now, tip number two.
I want to change my- so, by doing
the visualization exercise,
not focusing on myself, focusing on the audience,
I've changed my what?
- [Audience] State.
- [Dan] State.
Fear is gone.
Not, I don't care about looking good.
I don't care about sounding smart.
Don't care about any of those, shit, it doesn't matter.
Focus on the audience.
Make the switch.
How do I make the switch, is I have my own power move.
You have to derive your own power move,
whatever it means for you.
Here's my power move.
So, waiting, waiting, Steve is doing introduction,
introduction, I'm there, now, take a deep breath.
When I make the switch, I'll just go,
(body clap) I'm ready.
So, if you can imagine, so let's just do this.
So, imagine I'm behind the door, right?
You guys can't see.
I'm behind the door, he's doing that, okay.
(body clap) Yes!
Okay, yes, okay, then I go.
(clap)
Then, boom, I'm in state.
Some of my friends, one of my speaker friends,
he does a hawk move.
He's like, "hooooooo!"
(laughter)
He does that, it works for him,
he's like, "hooooo" and he does it three times,
then he will go.
Okay?
Tony Robins, does like, "Shhhh, yeah, shhhh!"
That's Tony Robin's, whatever works for you,
but you want to have your own power move.
'Cause you can make the switch any time.
You don't want to wait 'til,
you know what, today I just like, ah, man,
I don't feel like it.
It's just not my day, man,
it's one of those blue days.
Man, so, meh, I'm just gonna, go up there,
and just kinda do my thing and say hi everybody, yeah.
(laughter)
You don't want to leave it to chance.
So every time that becomes my power move,
do my thing, visualize, deep breath, jumping up and down,
(body smack) get in the zone.
Now you can see when I do the move,
you can see the shift in energy.
Yeah, so that's what I do, right?
And then I can do my thing.
Does that make sense?
- [Audience] Yeah.
- [Dan] So, your power move, whatever works for you.
You don't have to copy- try mine, maybe it's good.
But do your own, do your own.
Like, "Hooooo," you can do that, "hooooo!"
(audience laughter)
Whatever works for you.
Whatever works for you, okay?
Which is kind of weird, 'cause when I was backstage
with my friend, he was like "hoooo, hoooo!"
And it's like, "Ladies and Gentlemen,"
(laughter)
That is just the weirdest thing you'll see.
It's so funny, you know?
That's what he does.
It works for him.
So that's quick fix number two.
Quick fix number three: Most people, they have stage fright,
usually because they're afraid that they're
going to deliver a boring speech.
They're afraid that they're not going to do a good job.
That usually is an indicator
that you haven't practiced enough.
If you actually have practiced, because,
repeat after me: Confidence
- [Audience] Confidence
- [Dan] Comes from
- [Audience] Comes from
- [Dan] Competence.
- [Audience] Competence.
- [Dan] Competence.
Confidence comes from competence.
If you're good with what you do,
if you have skills,
you know what?
You're not nervous, you just do your thing.
If you haven't practiced, rehearsed your speech,
and you just go up there and wing it,
are you going to get nervous?
Yeah.
But if you practice it a dozen times,
and I recommend record yourself on video.
I know, it's very difficult to watch yourself on video.
How many of you find it difficult
to watch yourself on video?
Yeah, you're like, "Oh my God."
"I can't believe that's what I look like."
Or, "I can't believe that's what I sound like."
But, it's the best critique you'll get.
You watch yourself, just use your iPhone
and do your thing in front of the mirror,
just practicing, and you watch yourself.
If you watch your own video, and it sounds boring,
guess what, when you deliver your speech, you are...
- [Dan And Audience] Boring!
- [Dan] If you watch your video and you are,
you look nervous, when you deliver your speech,
you look nervous.
So, you can fix that.
You want to get to a point where, when you watch your video,
that, hmmmmm, that person's pretty good.
That person - I love watching my own stuff.
(laughter)
To critique.
I will watch it, and I will say, hmmm,
why, I should change that gesture, that didn't work.
That worked.
Ask Jenny, Jenny?
Do I always watch my own videos?
Say yes, right?
- [Jenny] Too much.
- [Dan] Too much.
(laughter)
Sometimes, it's funny, she walks by my office,
and I'm watching, and just having a good time
and laughing.
And she's like, "What the hell are you watching?
Why are you laughing at your own video?"
(laughter)
And I said, "'Cause that junk is funny!
"That junk is funny!
"I laugh at my own jokes."
Seriously, so, practice, and that's why I record it.
Of course, not just for YouTube purposes.
But for my own improvement.
So, practice, I guarantee you,
any before you go on stage or whatever presentation
you're going to do, if you practice two, three, five times,
you have more confidence and lower your anxiety.
If you still feel anxiety, practice a few more times.
Like, until it's like you're sick and tired of it.
You know what, I can do this in my sleep.
You're so confident, you go up there, and you do it.
Don't wing it, yes?
- [Audience] Yes.
- [Dan] Don't wing it, you know it.
Because stage time equals?
- [Dan And Audience] Wealth time.
- [Dan] Cherish every opportunity you get onstage.
Because, you never know is what I learned.
You never know who is in the audience.
And you never know who they know.
If you deliver value, and they like your message,
you don't know what kind of doors it will open for you.
That's what I've learned.
And that's why I constantly keep delivering speeches.
Because you just don't know, you just don't know.
So here are some Toastmasters I recommend.
If you have not participated, Toastmasters
would be a good organization to get involved with.
It's like $10, $20 a month or something like that.
You can join a lot of different local clubs in Vancouver.
You join www.toastmasters.org
And then also, for those of you that want to invest
a little bit of money, you go to dalecarnegietraining.com
which Warren Buffet has been through Dale Carnegie training,
I've been through it, love it, awesome.
So, for those of you that are a little bit more serious
about that, I would recommend dalecarnegie.com.
Their training is awesome.
I think they also have dalecarnegie.ca as well,
so they are training in Canada, as well.
So those are the two programs that I recommend.
Take two minutes, how long?
- [Audience] Two minutes.
- [Dan] Discuss the three quick fixes,
how you are going to do it, how are you going to buy it.
Go!
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(forceful music)