Translator: Robert Tucker Reviewer: Mile Živković
Meet Tracey, and Harriette,
two little girls who just want to be themselves, playing dress-up,
fixing their dolls' hair, but they can't.
They can't because the doctor designated them male at birth.
Even though they live their lives as girls,
that one designation leads to people treating them
as the boys that they are not, as the boys they never will be.
Harriette, who lives in Canada, must face harassment by Border Patrol
every time she travels to see her grandmother in the United States.
Tracey's school forces her to wear a boy's uniform,
administrators only refer to Tracey by her birth name Trey.
The spaces that these girls enter are not safe.
They're prevented from being seen as their true selves,
all because people have expectations based on a doctor's designation,
a designation out of Harriette and Tracey's control.
Now, similar to Harriette and Tracey,
I struggle with feeling comfortable in spaces
because other individuals make me feel as if I can't show my true self.
The title of this TED talk is: "She, he, and then there's me"
because I stand before you as a genderfluid individual.
When I look in a mirror I see and feel a man,
I see and feel a woman;
sometimes I embody both, sometimes I embody neither.
However, any time I enter a space, I make sure
that how I present myself matches what was assigned to me at birth.
As I prepared for this TED talk I wore a suit typically worn by males,
and by suit, of course, I mean dress shirt.
(Laughter)
I wore typical male dress shoes,
I didn't correct anybody when they said, "Hey, man, how's it going?"
18 years of conditioning has led to me not even think
about exploring the feminine side of my identity.
Yet, all my life I've been able to enter spaces,
I've gone to school, I was alto saxophonist in the concert band,
I played left midfielder in soccer.
These spaces were not constructed for me to show my genderfluid self.
This my friends is acceptance, let's elevate to inclusion.
We no longer want acceptance where we tell people:
"Hey, you're new to this space, this space will not adapt at all,
and thus you're going to lack the necessary resources to thrive."
We are going to turn our attention toward the system's
to reconstruct spaces to be safer.
Safer spaces are when we tell individuals: "Hey, you're new to this space, welcome."
Let's make sure we adapt this environment
so that you can thrive, that you can succeed.
Safer spaces are inclusion,
and the power of inclusion will enable more people than ever to be themselves.
For me, Harriette, and Tracey, and my transgender family,
inclusion means self-expression.
People should be able to enter public places
as their true self without repercussions.
In order to understand self-expression,
we need to know some key terms involving gender.
First, sex refers to our biological status
determined by measurable organs, hormones, and chromosomes.
Gender identity is the way
in which we in our head think and feel about our gender.
Gender expression is how we communicate our gender identity
through actions, dress, interactions, and behavior.
So, Harriette and Tracey use their gender expression
such as their long hair, such as their feminine names,
to show that they identify as girls.
And with acceptance, Harriette and Tracey are able to go to school,
they're able to go through Border Patrol,
however they must face discrimination once they enter.
Inclusion as self-expression means
that Tracey can go to school in the uniform that pleases her.
She can go by the name that fits how she feels on the inside.
Harriette can travel to see her grandma with a smile on her face
because she doesn't have to get bogged down in feeling sad
after people harassed her by calling her a he/she.
The power of inclusion will provide them the opportunity
to be seen and treated as the boys that they are.
And in the current American dream,
we are taught that our gender must match our sex assigned at birth.
With knowledge that these two identities may differ,
we must reinvent the public sphere,
so more people can express themselves in ways that fit their gender,
not fit a doctor's designation.
Moreover, inclusion means freedom to change oneself.
Now, earlier I mentioned that I struggle
with having my expression show my gender fluidity.
Fear of backlash weights heavily on me
if I even think about swapping my Forever 21 stud earrings with a hoop.
(Laughter)
Inclusion through freedom to change oneself means
that me, my transgender community, and any person
can evolve into any form of expression that matches how we feel on the inside.
It will also allow gender to be a journey beyond the binary.
When I go to a lecture one day, I should have the opportunity
to wear a dress and go by masculine pronouns
without classmates staring and whispering to one another,
because though they think that these little acts are harmless,
these little acts show me and tell me that what I'm doing is wrong,
and believe me, it isn't.
Our gender expression is always changing.
And for some people that change is beyond the gender binary,
and we need places to promote this growth, to promote this evolution of self.
And in order to have freedom to change oneself,
in order to have self-expression,
we need inclusion as learning and adapting.
As more people enter a space, diversity emerges,
different socializations interact.
This new development requires that the previous base must alter,
so that people can feel welcome, every person feels welcome.
In August of 2013, Governor of California, Jerry Brown, signed a law
that allows transgender students to pick
which bathrooms and sports teams they want to use.
This new law shows that California recognizes
the growing transgender population in their schools.
And this recognition led to governmental change
that allows trans students to feel included in their schools.
And for Ashton Lee, a 16-year-old transgender boy,
[that means] he can finally participate in boys' PE,
he can finally participate in men's football,
two activities that are reflective of his gender.
California's new law shows
that we are currently in the process of elevating acceptance to inclusion.
That means you, the audience, and myself can join the movement.
And there's an urgency to joining this movement.
We need inclusion, because acceptance is currently having detrimental effects
on the lives of transgender and gender non-conforming individuals.
Did you know that 78% of transgender and gender non-conforming students
experience harassment while in grades K through 12?
35% have to experience physical assault.
A sixth cannot even graduate, they must leave school
because they have to deal
with the psychological effects of bullying and harassment.
Well, did you know
that one-quarter lost a job
due to their gender identity and expression?
Well, did you know that 53% have dealt
with some form of verbal harassment in places of public accommodations,
such as our buses, our restaurants, even governmental agencies,
places designed to help citizens?
These statistics show
that we can no longer sit back and allow for lack of inclusion.
Trans people endure consequences for being the brave individuals
attempting to achieve an unconventional American dream,
and that is why we need inclusion,
so that the trans community is celebrated for their resilience and beauty.
And we also need inclusion so people such as myself
can explore and express our gender.
And here are individual things that we can do to make safer spaces.
The most important way is strive to be a better ally.
The way to do that is through self-education,
stop the gender policing and recognize intersectionality.
With self-education, we must ensure
that every person has an understanding of others' identities.
However, we cannot expect each individual
to be the sole educator of their own identity.
Stop the gender policing.
We must cease telling people that they have to act a certain way,
that they have to behave a certain way, based on their gender.
And it's not only those explicit acts of "don't do this,"
it's in those little moments of laughters, and giggles, and whispers.
Oftentimes, those have more impact than the explicit.
Recognize intersectionality,
we must focus on the ways in which our identities interact,
resources must be provided for each of these identity combinations.
And for trans people of color that means
that they'll not only have resources for their gender but also their race.
These suggestions are the tip of the iceberg.
We must search for more radical ways to implement inclusion as self-expression,
as freedom to change oneself, as learning and adapting.
So I leave you with this:
The American dream is never finished, we must always work toward reinvention.
I'm not calling for the big, national images of reinvention;
I'm calling for the local, everyday inclusion
so more people can be themselves.
I put on this lipstick because I will no longer be held down by this space,
this space shall please me.
I put on this lipstick because I declare the TEDx space
to be a space of inclusion rather than acceptance.
I put on this lipstick because I believe the power of inclusion will lead
toward the reinvention of the American dream.
So join me, we need your support.
Thank you so much.
(Applause)