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When do you feel closest to me?
Normally when you're on the couch and passed out and just in the mood for cuddles, you know that.
Needing a warm chest to lie on.
There's a sort of calmness that I think breaks down barriers, and...yeah.
-Thank you.
I'm next.
Described your three favorite memories of us
Three favorite movies...the first one
Would be when we first met actually; so I remember the day or the night
quite vividly at cafe Mexico -At Cafe Mexico
And I remember it because of the connection
You know between the two of us, and how we just got into conversation
so easily so effortlessly I
hold that memory quite close and quite dear.
Second memory that I love and cherish. Oh yes, when we were at the farm
We're at the farm, one of your friend's farms, and we went on to the hill and
we sat on top and we had the most beautiful view and then sort of like a
promise that we made to each other on top of that hill to remember the good times and to remember these moments
when things get rough because you know it's just this honeymoon phase of us just being
Lovey-dovey and completely into each other and then that was the promise we made on that hill.
What was your biggest concern about introducing me to your family and why
Well
I'm half Africaans.And not a lot of my family is as progressive as I would like
I was kind of mortified that somebody would actually be racist to you and just
it was-it still is like what a
Quite a question you know
Thank you, for being quite nice, but
It doesn't have to be rational
I think that's-that would be my biggest concern.
But, um, so far it's been good
You know white nuclear families are little different, right?
-yeah.
What bothers you the most about judgments you get for dating a white guy that I don't realize
Sure these questions are getting
Intense.
Yeah interesting, and that's a very good question
Sure
What bothers me the most I think?
That you don't know.. yeah, I think it's it's um
I'm proudly as you know a black and I'm proudly a black woman, and I'm proudly black.
And I absolutely
Love my community
I do find it challenging when
When people around me
Sort of
Judge me for being with a white person, and they don't understand
"How can you be pro-black, and
still be dating a white person"?
so
That doesn't-that makes me extremely uncomfortable,
and
It's sort of like I mean, we have the conversations, but I think it's a conversation that I
can't
Have with you in a full way because you're not black and you're not a woman so I can only tell you
That it hurts, that
It's it's unfair and
I
Wish it would I wish people would open up their hearts and minds
About two people who are together who are coming from different environments and that love each other
And it's stopped putting a negative thing
Or a negative idea on top of that because it just dampens a very positive
Feeling and space. I mean the way I see it. It's like saying to somebody
You can't be a feminist if you date a man. You know it's the same kind of budgering. In my opinion it doesn't make sense, but it's your question.
Yeah, yeah, I totally hear that.
Where do you feel the most and
The least acceptance of us as a mixed couple
I think the most acceptance is probably in the hood
in our neighborhoods quite mixed race and
you know it's not uncommon to see you know mixed race people and you know it's
that weird moment we were in a bar and like all the cool kids were mixed race?
you know it's like like mixed mixed race couples, but all the cool people but
The little towns is when it gets a bit more awkward
That stare that lasts too long that kid kind of looks away in disgust yeah
I'd say the countryside is, yeah, where the most judgement happens.
Little towns in South Africa, is a scary place still
-That's true
And dangerous place.
Especially when you can't find accommodation, right? -Yeah.
Okay
What is the one thing I don't understand about you? Well I think being a woman and being black
You know it's just like I cannot fully understand
you know
What it's like or what it means in the full sense?
What it is you know to be
white, male,
intersectional.
I think that's the one thing I mean there's been my journey
as a black female
It's sometimes, you know, a challenging journey for a number of reasons and
I think some of the things it's I can only get, and as much as I can share with you I
Can only get it and that's why I think girlfriends are so important because I can then meet with my girlfriends
And I can you know they can sort of understand really where I'm coming from all the experiences I face
At work, or you know walking down the street or whatever being a black female is
something else
It's wonderful. It's great, but we also have to be real about
the challenges
You know black Queens face
Yes; my queen.
Name top five things you love about me.
I love you for you.
I love that you're proud of who you are and
Sort of a person that's okay with that, okay with being you
You is amazing, and you're fashionable and beautiful; fun. My partner in crime and many things.
I love that you like to live.
I think we're both big fans of good living so whether it's good food, or going to the theater
You know we like doing things. We like living life. I
Love that you're not on the road, which is, I think, great.
I love that I like you as a person, I love that I love you as a person, not
You know not just as a partner because I lonely but because I actually like you.
Cool, thank you.
I don't know if that was viable.
Ok, my turn.
Hey Topaz here
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