(scatting)
(laughing)
(whimsical piano playing)
- Oh look at that, is he entertaining?
- Alright ladies and gentlemen,
may I have your attention please?
I may have had just one too many tequilas,
and the drinks that I over poured, I had to drink them,
(laughing)
- Anybody in here irish?
- Oh Danny boy,
the pipes,
the pipes are calling.
- This is his passion.
- Now facilitating
his own ego,
is more important to him
Than taking care of his business.
- Yeah.
- Thank you!
- Sure.
- Okay, um.
Dry-lady,
- What?
- New one.
- What's wrong?
(gasps)
- There is a hair in the wing.
- I [Bleep] wanna [Bleep] Shoot myself in the [Bleep] Face.
- So there's a silver hair
in Rodney's food, - Oh God!
- I wonder where that came from.
♪ Coming back one summers, ♪
♪ in the meadow, ♪
- So here's a guy who likes to drink
because he's the life of the party,
it pumps his ego.
He likes to buy everybody drinks Mike,
because it pumps his,
- Ego.
- Look at how well dressed he is,
because it pumps his
- [Female Host] Ego.
- [Male Host] Look at how he's just focused on being
the man on stage, because of his...
- Ego. - Ego.
- I'm not sure
if he salvageable.
Why don't you guys go in,
and let's see if his ego's more important
than his business.
Okay?
- Okay.
- Alright let's see what happens, guys.
Thank you.
I gotta end this.
I'm gonna send my experts in to pull the plug, literally,
right now.
♪ Oh when the valley's ♪
♪ lush and white with snow, ♪
♪ yes I'll be here. ♪
(intense thumping music)
- What happened?
- [Mike] Come on down, Tony.
- [Female Host] Shoe's over Tony, get down here.
- Oh.
(inaudible screamo music)
- Oh, man.
- Okay, Jen is covering her ear.
Punk rock should be loud, but it can't be piercing.
So when they're bringing the volume up
because the system stinks,
it becomes intolerable for you.
It creates an unsafe environment for the customers and staff
and could lead to irreversible ear damage.
I mean it's unprofessional.
- If it's gonna be like this every night,
I'm not gonna come back.
As a musician, I would not want to play here.
Because the bar is not designed to have live music,
it is amplified like that,
and it just doesn't look like
anyone's gonna survive this way.
Because in the punk rock world, the scene here
is too limited to be successful.
- So you're gonna help me with
my online reviews and research.
So a guest posts,
"I gave this bar a one star rating on Facebook.
The owner, David sent me harassing messages.".
So here's what he wrote back.
"Thanks for the one star and going out of your way
like a [Bleep] Lane.
You and your hipster friends shouldn't be here
to begin with.
It's a [Bleep] punk rock dive bar, you [Bleep] Crybaby.
- What?!
- That's [Bleep] Punk rock there dude.
- Ugh.
- The acoustics are really bad,
so it just became blaringly loud.
And the vibe itself
was very sausage-festive.
- This is my showtime walk.
(jazzy music)
- Wonder bar!
I'm here!
(sparatic scatting with light piano)
(laughing)
♪ High above the clouds, it's just a dream, ♪
(singer laughing)
- We're gonna start that one again.
(throaty noises)
(laughing)
- She can't [Bleep] Sing.
♪ And don't take away, my false security. ♪
- The sad thing is,
if she didn't move to River North, Chicago,
She could own some little bar somewhere,
pay 2000 dollars a month rent,
and she could live her dream playing music.
- And be doing it.
- But the fact of the matter is,
she put herself in a premier space at 18000 dollars a month,
and now she's [Bleep].
(Jazzy piano)
♪ Hear my rule, baby soon. ♪
- Customers are walking out,
so she's been on stage for about four minutes,
and they're already leaving.
(Jazzy saxophone)
- [Lonnie] I wanna thank y'all for being here tonight,
at the Underground Wonderbar!
- You guys are all supposed to go.
- whoo!
- Alright, alright, alright.
- Why are you here?
(all laughing)
- There's another bar downstairs,
and then Jordan's gonna do some spoken word.
The bartender back here.
This is a two story venue, rent is about 60 dollars a foot.
So based upon the economics of the bar business,
she's gotta do 2 million dollars a year out of that bar.
- Geeze.
That's why the downstairs
is just as important as the upstairs.
Let's hope Jordan is better at speaking
than his mother is at singing.
- Indigenous.
I said, indigenous people of Chicago,
there is no need to swallow the pride,
that has given us the stride to strive
down these streets and fleets for so long.
Why two men in the fields,
that used to play in our goal,
and this is just not another sad
- Aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye.
- Their stage is right above him.
So the spoken word is now the screaming word.
- Sounds like my mom has struck back up there.
- What the [Bleep] Is this?
- You thought you were getting away.
Damn, this one hurts.
- Lonnie doing her thing with the music was, odd.
- Odd. It was uncomfortable.
(laughing)
- Oh here comes the band.
- This is the band that he booked!
- He's got a horn on his head and his ass is showing,
in a a room that is completely empty.
Now what man, wants to be in that room?
Who done with Ian.
- It's like an accident, you don't wanna look,
but sometimes you have to.
♪ I love your, God bless America, ♪
♪ and this song is, uh, called under the black flag. ♪
♪ (inaudible screaming) ♪
- She's the only person there.
- They're leaving!
- Do you blame them?
Guys this is a freaking mess,
Rod focuses all of his energies on the music,
find out what's going on in the kitchen,
find out what's bad behind the bar,
and let's get this ass out of here!
(intense thumping music)
(inaudible screamo music)
- Is there anybody in the bar at all?
- Hardly at all.
- You're in the cold, 250,000 dollars,
and this is what you're banking your future on?
Are you [Bleep] Nuts?
How [Bleep] Moronic is that?
Shut them the [Bleep] Down
and get them off that stage.
I won't be in the same room with this bull [Bleep].