SCP-Big Egg - object class keter
Item #: SCP-Big egg
Object Class: Euclid Keter
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-Big egg is to kept in a specially manufactured Big
egg carton located in Egg Observation Site 77.
Any and all changes are to immediately reported to the Site Director, who has the egg authority
to call down Mobile Task Force Rho-19-Egg ("The Frying Pan") to dispatch or terminate
SCP-Big egg using several jumbo, industrial size vats of Big balsamic vinegar.
Description: SCP-Big egg is a Big egg an unidentifiable object masked by an antimemetic egg field,
which prevents any and all sapient breakfast consumers from perceiving it or the situations
surrounding it in any other way than Big egg.
A mild, yet Big semantic egg property prevents SCP-Big egg from being referred to as any
other official, proper, or Big designation.
Visually, SCP-Big egg appears to be a Big egg, complete with appropriate egg parts such
as shell, membrane, white and yolk, all of which have been appropriately upscaled to
the correct Big to be fitting for Big egg.
It was, at one point, a much smaller Big egg, but has since increased in Big since then.
Limited research conducted using mnestic egg drugs has suggested that Big egg's true form
might be an obese, naked man, who has been observed running throughout the facility yelling
"It worked!
They'll never know I'm not Big egg!"
These claims are in dispute, as a battery of scientific tests have shown SCP-Big egg
to only be a bird egg of unusual Big.
Reports of egging, Bigging, and general mayhem throughout the Foundation related to SCP-Big
egg are to be roundly ignored, as its egg properties of Big and egg roundly preclude
these possibilities.
Addendum-1:
Experiment #: 035 Testing: Length
Method: A standard tape measure and an egg ladder were used to precisely measure the
exact size of Big egg.
Result: SCP-Big egg was found to be roughly Big centimeters.
Note: I'm not even sure what we were expecting.
Experiment #: 036 Testing: Semantic Resistance.
Method: D-3455 was instructed to walk up and clearly vocalize the words "egg big"
Result: [DATA EGGSPUNGED] Note: Oh.
Addendum-2:
"Unfortunately, SCP-Big egg has recently experienced a growth spurt, meaning it is almost twice
as Big and nearly four times as egg.
The egg semantic property is beginning to spread to egg objects nearest Big egg as well,
and there are several psychological and perceptive anomalies.
The entire egg site is affected by this Big problem.
What do you recommend?"
–Dr. Sunny Sydup
"This is Big.
It's time to enact Protocol Big egg.
I'm going to authorize MTF-BE to Big the egg once and for all!
–Site Director Chris P. Bacon
"Oh, Site Director!
Not you too!"
–Dr. Sunny Sydup
"Big egg."
–Site Director Chris P. Bacon
"Big egg."
–Dr. Sunny Sydup
Addendum-3:
A Big sheet of egg paper was recovered alongside Big egg.
Wow!
You've just found yourself your very own Breakfast Menu, a limited time collection served from
6:00 AM to 1:00 PM, from The Waffle Shop.
Eat them all and your money back!
01.
Mr. Belgian Waffle 02.
Mr. Belgian Waffle with chocolate chips 03.
Mr. Stack of 4 Pancakes 04.
Mr. French Toast 05.
Mr. One Egg ✔ 06.
Mr. Two Eggs 07.
Mr. Villager Omelet 08.
Mr. Bacon and Cheese Omelet 09.
Mr. Poached Egg 10.
Ms. One Hot Fresh Cinnamon Roll Straight from Our Bakery
11.
Mr. Bacon (four thick strips) or Mr. Sausage (five links)
12.
Mr. Fruit Cup 13.
Mr. Home Fries 14.
Mr. Grapefruit 15.
Mr. Cottage Cheese 16.
Mr. Quaker® Hot Oatmeal with brown sugar 17.
Mr. Juice (orange, apple, cranberry) 18.
Mr. Coffee 19.
Mr. Tea 20.
Mr. Milk (chocolate, skim, whole, or fish)