Okay. Brace, Brace, brace. We're going in.
Look at his... He's concentrating like mad.
He looks like a proper orangutan when he concentrates.
Firing up the rotors!
Oh God!
Whoa!
Why didn't we have this in Albania?
Goodbye, lavatory!
Bricks flying everywhere.
This is bloody brilliant.
Stop there, stop there! Jeremy, the roof's going to land on it.
This was no problem because my destroyer of worlds
had a special device for protecting the driver.
-Is that a remote control for that? -Yes, it is!
-You can actually drive it from there? -Yes.
-From there? -Yes.
-Do you know how to? -No, but how hard can it be?
-Look at that. -Oh, my God!
-Now, stand back a bit. -Really? Do you think?
At the other end of the estate,
the professionals were working methodically,
first removing all the rooves.
And I thought I'd do the same thing with my army tank.
Mounted on the back of my 434 is a big harpoon. I'll fire that over
with a cable attached, connect the cable up,
drive this way, pull the roof off, get on with it.
Live and, well, go.
Brilliant.
Let's begin.
The grappling hook will catch on the roof. That's it. It's caught it now.
Yeah. Here it comes, pulling the roof off.
Let's have a look.
It's not off.
On the plus side, though, the house now had another upstairs lavatory.
Why have you pulled a portaloo over a building?
It was supposed to pull the roof off.
This isn't demolition. This is just stupid.
Whilst Hammond persevered with his idiotic roof-removal system,
James was busy drawing a diagram.
The four walls are pre-cast pieces of concrete
and then in the middle we have this, which is the chimney breast.
And then there are steal RSJs running across, like that.
Everything else is wooden floorboards. So, if we knock out that bit there,
which is holding the house up,
the roof and everything else will fall into a neat pile in the middle.
My plan involved pulling the chimney breast out,
using both my winch and the sheer power of my combat tractor.
But it was hard to concentrate with the orangutan around.
It's got a mind of its own.
Having got in everyone's way, he then started throwing massive lumps of road
over the houses and into the next street.
-What have you done? -I hit a water main!
Well, you're an idiot.
As noon approached, our rivals were scything through their houses.
But now my ingenious cable solution would put us back in the running.
Here we go.
Oh! Oh, it's so close.
Yes. Yes!
But despite this success, let's not forget we still had Jeremy on our side.
I've lost control completely now.
In the spirit of teamwork, I decided to clear up his rubbish,
while Hammond set about finishing off my house.
Now you need to give this the beans. Let's not mess about here. In we go.
Oh! The roof came open. I didn't expect that.
Hammond, what's happened here, mate, is you are now the foundations of the house.
I think I might be a bit stuck.
Hang on, Hammond. I'm coming.
Where are you going?
Oh dear.
That felt nasty. What happened then?
James crashed into the corner of the house
and now you've got a whole house on your head.
Engine running.
May then winched Hammond's tank out...
but Hammond himself was still trapped inside.
Happily, though, as I'd finally house-trained my machine...
Walkies. Yes! Good digger.
...I was able to mount a rescue.
[bleep]
Bad digger!
Oh! I've scratched me tank.
By now, the professionals had pulled out an enormous lead.
So, to try and catch up, I decided to dig even deeper into the military toy box.
-Guys. -What on Earth is that?
I put some explosives in the house.
You might want to stand back 'cause I'm now going to do the long walk.
Is that the suit or his piles that's making him walk like that?
Fire in the hole!
You've only blown the bloody door off!
After that failure, we decided just to use our machines as battering rams.
Come on. Let's just get this job done.
Not going to use the rotavator. It's just too perilous.
Bloody hell fire!
Go on. In you go.
Finally, we were really getting somewhere.
Attack!
-Oh, no, no! -Oh, my God!
The professionals had finished. They had knocked everything down,
whereas we... sort of hadn't.
Why don't we present them with a prize, okay?
-Yeah. -Standing just there.
-Yes. -That's a good idea.
And then give them a really loud round of applause.
-A thunderous well done! -And throw the thing over.