- [Narrator] Hey, Psych2Goers, how do you see yourself?
Are you confident in who you are,
or do you struggle a lot with it?
Seeing value and worth in yourself despite what others think
and what you go through,
is important to your overall wellbeing.
It can affect how you think, feel and act towards yourself
and also impact how you let others treat you.
While many may think that low self-esteem
looks like someone who is sitting alone by themselves
not wanting to do anything all the time,
it can actually manifest in a number of different ways,
some which may surprise you.
So to look more into this topic,
here are seven habits of people with low self-esteem.
Number one, procrastination.
Are you always delaying or avoiding things you have to do?
Whether it's a project for work
or replying to emails and messages,
this habit to procrastinate on things
may stem from having a low self-esteem.
According to several studies
that looked into self-esteem and procrastination,
it's found that those with low self-esteem
tend to procrastinate and delay their tasks more,
since it can justify poor performance and negative outcomes.
To protect your self esteem from the possibility of failure,
you may purposefully sabotage yourself early on.
By doing so, if you do get a bad grade or make a mistake,
you can blame it on the circumstances
in the limited time you had, instead of your ability.
Number two: Passivity.
Do you actively take steps to reach your dreams
or do you just let things happen to you?
Another habit you may develop from having low self-esteem
is passivity.
This can mean being disinterested and disengaged
from everyday activities or letting opportunities pass by
without a moment's thought.
When you have low self-esteem, you may believe
that you're not capable of achieving your goals or dreams.
As a result, you may lack the motivation and drive
to try or to take the steps to get closer
to achieving what you want.
If you find that the things you want felt too overwhelming
and almost impossible to reach,
try to break them up into smaller steps.
If you wanna be a published author
but are struggling to write,
you can try taking up a class or talking to people
about their experience in the field.
Little by little, you may start to find yourself
becoming more active in chasing what you want.
Number three, negative self talk.
Are you very harsh on yourself?
The way you speak to yourself
can affect your attitude and behavior.
And so if you tend to be very negative about yourself,
then it's likely that your self-esteem will suffer.
Perhaps you are overly critical of yourself.
You blame yourself for things that are out of your control
or are always focused on the negative side of things
instead of looking at the bigger picture.
In the end, when all you're surrounding yourself with
is criticism and negativity, all the time,
your mental and emotional health will take a dive.
So if you notice that you tend to be very negative,
you can try to be more aware
of the things you are telling yourself
and question whether they are true.
Are these thoughts helping you
or just unnecessarily pulling you down?
Number four: Isolation.
Have you been ignoring your friends' calls
and invitations lately?
It's normal to wanna have some alone time from time to time
but it may become a cause for concern
when you start to isolate yourself for a long time,
from everyone around you.
Related to the last point, having low self-esteem can lead
to negative thoughts and beliefs,
such as thinking that you're unworthy of friendship or love.
Or believing that you're a burden to be around.
As a result, you may start to isolate yourself
from your loved ones.
Unfortunately, by doing this,
you may only end up ruminating even more,
often to the point that it no longer matches up
with what's true and real.
For this reason, it's important to go out
and meet up with people and stop these negative thoughts
from taking over.
Number five: People pleasing.
Do you agree to plans despite being busy and unavailable
just because you don't want to upset anyone?
When your self esteem is low,
you may turn to pleasing others
to feel validated and accepted.
While it's certainly good to wanna help and care for others
it can become an issue
if you're only doing it to gain approval.
Or if you end up sacrificing all your energy
or your mental wellbeing for it.
People pleasing may also lead to exhaustion and burnout,
since you're taking on much more than you can carry.
So before you take on any more plans for other people,
remember to also think about your own needs and wants.
And set some healthy boundaries for yourself.
Number six: Perfectionism.
Are you always overworking yourself
until the project or task
is done to the utmost of perfection?
When you feel like you're not worthy or good enough
you might try to perfect the things around you
to create the illusion of success and achievement.
With low self-esteem, you may worry about others
thinking that you're incompetent
and overcompensate by trying to do everything perfectly.
However, since it's impossible to do so,
you might just find yourself
even more stressed and overwhelmed,
sometimes to the point of burnout.
So while it's hard to admit, try to remind yourself
that it's human to make mistakes.
And number seven: Being unable to accept compliments.
As you feel awkward when someone praises you
for a job well done.
According to a study that looked at the relationship
between self-esteem and positive feedback,
it's found that those with low self-esteem
tend to have a harder time accepting compliments.
This is because your self perceived sense of worthlessness
contradicts the positive feedback you receive.
As a result, you may find yourself unable to accept praise
or think that what is being said is untrue.
Or because of a misunderstanding.
Do you struggle with seeing your worth?
Let us know in the comments below.
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The references and studies used in this video
are added in the description box below.
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Thanks so much for being a part of this journey.
(tender music)