[lauren] why am i eating this right now?
[lauren] it's like 10am.
[john] they don't know that in tv land.
[lauren] alright, what's up it's lauren.
[john] and john.
[lauren] from hot for food,
[lauren] and we are here today to cook for you
[lauren] actually we're doing a little bit of a friendly,
[lauren] uh, competition because tomorrow's international hamburger day
[lauren] which means; get your burgers ready
[lauren] we're gonna pimp our burgers but we're gonna do like a
[lauren] lauren versus john
[lauren] burger-off.
[john] she's all about the gimmick,
[john] she prepares, [lauren] i don't do gimmicks.
[john] you prepare, you went and bought stuff.
[lauren] i thought about how i wanted to make my burger
[john] i'm just gonna use what we have in the kitchen [lauren] you don't know what you're doing?
[john] no, not yet.
[lauren] typical john. "i don't have a plan, i'm not gonna plan for this video."
[lauren] so we're gonna use gardein's beefless burgers
[lauren] gonna cook those up in a pan and then it's gonna be more about the toppings
[lauren] and the way we pimp out the burger,
[lauren] and then you guys will vote in the comments below
[lauren] do you like lauren's burger or do you like john's burger?
[lauren] so while we- [john] go!
[lauren] *laughs* it's not a time thing.
[john] what if i actually prepared though,
[john] and i do have a secret weapon?
[lauren] whatever. go ahead [john] whatever. okay.
[lauren] you're gonna put it on bread?
[john] burger sandwich.
[lauren] ew.
[lauren] a burger is a sandwich!
[john] whatever.
[lauren] are you gonna make a grilled cheese burger?
[john] no.
[john] we have tons of cheese to use
[lauren] yea, but you can't use all the cheese cos i need some.
[john] get out of here! [lauren] gah!
[lauren] this is funny, we've never done something like this before.
[lauren] well, our whole relationship's a competiiton but
[lauren] this could become a real series,
[lauren] like we start with a box of pasta and we're like
[lauren] okay, what are you gonna do with the pasta?
[john] pasta la vista.
[john] do we have like-
[john] cookie cutters? like rings?
[john] do we have those?
[lauren] i don't know, john. find them.
[john] that sounds like something we have. that was a "yes we have it"
[john] i'm gonna tear apart this kitchen.
[lauren] i know, and that's going to annoy me.
[john] tell me where they are/
[lauren] they're just down there, you bought them!
[lauren] if you're gonna cook up pre made veggie burgers
[lauren] from frozen you should add barbeque sauce while you cook them
[lauren] because it just makes them look like meat
[lauren] and also, it makes them taste better.
[lauren] so you don't need the bun?
[john] nope.
[john] see?
[lauren] whateverrr
[john] well, she's sweating right now. she's just like
[lauren] i have like an amazing idea [john] "that's pretty good."
[lauren] i kinda hate when you go to a burger place or a restaurant place
[lauren] and you see like,
[lauren] all these different burgers that are like,
[lauren] okay, come on like it's just a burger
[lauren] you don't need to make it crazy.
[john] totally. [lauren] however,
[john] however, [lauren] sometimes if the ingredients go well together
[lauren] i think it's nice to make a fancy burger.
[lauren] so i feel like i'm making sort of a fancy pants burger.
[lauren] so i'm gonna do garlic-y greens,
[lauren] and mushrooms,
[lauren] smoked gouda sauce,
[lauren] smoked maple tahini, gouda sauce.
[john] so it's gourmet versus ghetto.
[lauren] yea, gourmet versus ghetto!
[lauren] gourmet. *points to john* ghetto.
[lauren] you think it's pretty good i saw your face
[lauren] when i said what i was doing he would have this like [john] it's not!
[lauren] "oh, that's good"
[lauren] hey, what you doing? you tryna hit me with the pan?
[john] no.
[john] well then what are you making?
[john] grilled cheese.
[lauren] well how many patties' gonna be in there?
[john] your mind is- [lauren] ohh, you're gonna do grilled cheese is on the outside of the pa-
[john] that's pretty good!
[lauren] yea, that's pretty funny, okay.
[john] grilled cheese buns!
[lauren] why is it in a circle?
[john] it's just aesthetically, to see a round burger
[lauren] okay. [john] i mean, you don't have to cut the crust off,
[john] i did.
[john] have you seen this before? this done before? grilled cheese burger outside
[lauren] well, no, i can't recall if i've seen it but i'm sure it's been done.
[john] if you thought of it, it's been done [lauren] yea.
[john] so i have a question: how are you gonna make a gouda?
[john] or how are you gonna make your cheese taste like gouda?
[lauren] because we have smoked gouda from daiya here.
[john] oh yea they did the- yea yea.
[lauren] smoked gouda daiya cheese we had leftover.
[lauren] maple tahini sauce that i had leftover from falafels that i made,
[john] mhm. [lauren] it's like tahini and lemon juice,
[lauren] maple syrup,
[lauren] little bit of garlic,
[lauren] umm, apple cider vinegar .
[lauren] it's really good.
[lauren] i did a cup of cremini mushrooms, sautéed in a tablespoon of butter.
[lauren] and then i'm just going to dump them into a bowl,
[lauren] and put a plate over top to keep them warm,
[lauren] and then i'm gonna do the chard in the same pan with the garlic.
[lauren] it's so pretty, so you're gonna see like,
[lauren] pink and green, like as the greens in my burger which i think is cool.
[john] so you're gonna do it with your eyes.
[lauren] yea, i'm gonna take like one large leaf, probably just cook that down.
[lauren] for one burger, that's enough.
[john] that's smart, see because what she's doing,
[john] is she knows that you guys can't taste this back home
[john] so she's gonna make you guys eat with your eyes
[john] and think that it looks
[john] pretty or it tastes better than it actually is.
[lauren] no, everything i make looks pretty and tastes amazing.
[lauren] suck it, diemer.
[john] suck it, diemer.
[lauren] *laughs*
[john] that actually smells really good.
[lauren] yea, i know.
[john] okay.
[lauren] to any dark leafy greens, you can braise them in garlic
[lauren] and nutmeg and they're amazing.
[lauren] that's what i'm doing to my chard.
[john] i think a burger, like a classic hamburger
[john] was like one of the first things i learnt how to
[john] cook when i was a kid.
[lauren] really?
[john] that and grilled cheese.
[john] we used to make our burgers from scratch and
[john] as a binder we would use french onion soup mix.
[john] isn't that weird?
[lauren] no, that's pretty common in canada
[john] is it? it's common in ghetto?
[john] it's pretty weird, but it's normal for you.
[john] i mean, it's fine.
[john] i don't know what people are gonna prefer here
[john] i'm actually [lauren] it could go either way?
[john] it could go either way.
[lauren] i don't know we could have like, the winner somehow gets an advantage
[lauren] at the next competition.
[john] you use pickle?
[lauren] maybe, okay, you have to decide that the other person has to
[lauren] incorporate a certain ingredient into what they're doing.
[lauren] yea,
[lauren] yea, that's good.
[john] i like that.
[john] i'm okay with that and especially because i know i'm gonna win.
[john] and you know i'm gonna win this. [lauren] you're just trash talking the whole time.
[lauren] i've said nothing cos i know my burger stands for itself.
[lauren] you're worried, so you're like
[lauren] "i'm gonna win, i'm gonna win"
[lauren] so for my smoked gouda sauce,
[lauren] i'm taking daiya smoked gouda,
[lauren] so it's half a cup of that
[lauren] in a pot,
[lauren] and i'm gonna melt it,
[lauren] with my maple tahini sauce which i'll link to that recipe below.
[john] come on.
[john] it looks good.
[john] got a little bit scared but look at that.
[john] so i need sauces here.
[john] for this epic burger. i think ketchup, grilled cheese
[john] as ghetto as it is, this is the ghetto burger, so.
[john] i'm gonna do something a little bit different,
[john] i'll do a sriracha ketchup,
[john] this thing is gonna be absurd.
[john] sriracha ketchup. very complicated,
[john] 2 parts ketchup
[john] 1 part sriracha.
[john] tricky stuff, guys. don't forget it, okay?
[john] i've worked on top chef and masterchef doing audio,
[john] and the biggest mistake the chefs always make
[john] is that they don't taste their food.
[lauren] is what?
[john] exactly.
[lauren] what?
[lauren] don't taste it.
[lauren] and you know what, i never taste anything and it always is awesome.
[john] famous last words.
[lauren] oh, i don't know, here's my f--king cheese sauce
[lauren] this cheese sauce, this is gonna kill you, this is the winning thing of the whole thing.
[john] let me try it. [lauren] no! you can't try till it's done.
[john] it's crunch time.
[john] this is assembling.
[lauren] this is just the final moment here.
[lauren] make sure you've got what you like,
[john] yea, get it on the plate,
[lauren] kay, so there they are.
[lauren] i don't know, my one's pretty fancy compared to yours.
[john] that is, that is gourmet cos no other- [lauren] mine is pretty amazing
[john] uh, can you say something nice about mine?
[john] i said something nice about yours [lauren] it's hilarious.
[john] it's definitely hilarious
[john] it's not what i was expecting like it's all
[lauren] it's exactly what you expected, that's what you said.
[john] it's unedibly large,
[john] like it's [lauren] it looks like a burger though,
[lauren] just has grilled cheese on the outside, like it's pretty clever.
[lauren] kay, let's do a taste test.
[john] i'm pushing mine down
[john] kay, here we go.
[john] i can't even.
[lauren] mine can win a burger competition that's not even a vegan burger competition
[lauren] what? [john] i won.
[lauren] no you didn't [john] it's so good. having a poll.
[lauren] based on looks, and creativity and idea
[lauren] and your appeal,
[lauren] make a comment down below
[lauren] smoked gouda mushrooom chard burger
[lauren] or grilled cheese burger.
[john] mm.
[john] bye.
[lauren] bye.
[lauren] burger time.
[lauren] mine is restaurant-worthy.
[john] mine's after-the-nightclub-worthy
[john] "you see my phone?"
[john] "this is josh, he's gonna help me find my phone"
[john] "mm, i love grilled cheese and burgers"
[john] "when is the uber getting here?"
[lauren] okay.