- Miss Willy Wonka is opening the gates
to her chocolate factory.
Hidden in five lucky Wonka Bars around the world
are golden tickets that grant you access to the factory.
Four have already been awarded.
- [Interviewer] Kim, how did you find it?
- I eat like 100 Wonka Bars a day to keep my ass big.
I didn't even know there was a contest.
- [Interviewer] You're lucky winner number two!
Can you believe it?
- Well, I had thousands of workers looking for mine
and I finally found it.
- [Interviewer] You, you mean the worker found it.
- For me.
Therefore, I found it.
- [Interviewer] Okay, but technically--
- Technically, it don't matter
because she died from exhaustion immediately after.
- These paws have grabbed the golden ticket, baby.
This day is for the Monsters.
- I'm destined to be famous and to always win.
I found it on the first buy.
- [Interviewer] Are you a fan of Wonka Bars?
- Hell no.
Those bars taste like sh--
- There is still one last Golden ticket out there.
Who will be the next winner?
- This has gotta be the Golden Ticket.
I just know it has to.
- Nicki?
Come have some dinner, dear.
- Shut up.
I don't want any of that nasty ass cabbage water.
Who the (beep) even eats cabbage water?
Get a job.
Please be a golden ticket to take me away from this (beep).
Damn it.
- Aw, better luck next time, kiddo.
Let's try mine.
- When did you get a Wonka Bar?
You were supposed to get tobacco
with the money I gave you.
- Thought I'd try my luck.
- Well, you wasted your money because you're not gonna--
- I've got one!
- What?
- I've got a golden ticket.
Yippee!
(playful music)
- Wait, I thought you were bedridden?
- I've got a golden ticket.
Ha ha, we've got it.
This is the best day of my agh!
(loud thudding)
- You've been able to walk this whole (beep) time?
All these years De Nicki Minaj's
been taking care of you for nothing?
The hell I look like, Cinderella?
I'm taking this ticket.
And take a damn bath,
you stink so bad you make horse (beep)
smell like air freshener.
- Congratulations, De Nicki Minaj.
- Who the hell are you?
- I have a proposition for you.
- Get the hell out of my house.
(screaming)
- [Announcer] Today's the big day.
Any moment now, Miss Willy Wonka will make her way down
to greet her lucky winners.
- Yall know I'm going in first, right?
- Says who?
- Says money.
I got the most of it.
- In the end, does anyone ever really get to go first?
Monsters only, baby.
- Did this bitch just call us monsters?
- Everybody shut up.
I see Miss Wonka.
(cheering)
- Yeah, I'm not walking all the way over there.
If you have a ticket come in.
(thudding)
- Coming.
Hi, I'm Mari--
- I don't care.
Has everyone signed the contract saying you won't sue me?
- [All] Yeah.
- Good.
- But why did you need urine and blood samples?
- Yeah, and you took my social security number, too.
- And a lock of my hair.
- She's got my Simflix password.
- Let's continue the tour.
(all groaning)
- What the hell is this room?
- I don't do small spaces, I don't like this (beep)
- Which one of you stupid bitches just grabbed my ass?
- I kind of like this, baby.
Tight spaces can't hold me down.
- Miss Wonka, how do we get out?
- There's a special password.
- Well punch it in!
- I don't remember the password.
- [All] What?
- [Wonka] This is the chocolate room.
Everything in this room is edible.
- You can eat everything?
- That's what edible means, stupid.
- Oh my God.
(smacking noise, cries out)
- I didn't say you can go yet.
Okay, go.
(happy eating noises)
(spitting and coughing)
- That tasted gross!
- What the hell did De Nicki Minaj just
put in her mouth?
- Candy.
- This is not candy!
- My taste buds are screaming with revulsion, baby.
- It is candy, but it's expired.
- I'm gonna be sick.
- No wonder that flower tasted like grass!
- That was a real flower.
- Oh.
- Are you trying to kill us?
- A little.
- What about that over there?
Is that just a river of (beep) from the sewer?
- No, that's actually fresh chocolate.
- Wow.
It looks so good.
I wanna wear it and moo to the cows, baby.
- This is where I make my delicious chocolate.
- Um, who are those pumpkin people?
- Those are oompa loompas, they're so annoying.
- Do they work here?
- Yeah, but I've fired them like twenty times
and they keep coming back.
- We love you, Kourtney!
- (beep) you.
- I want one.
- I've tried giving them away, they won't leave.
- I don't care, I want one.
I'm gonna have one.
In fact, I want one now.
- Can it, you stupid bitch!
(growling noise)
- The hell? Look at Kim!
(gulping noises)
- Ew, stop, you'll ruin the chocolate.
- This is gonna do wonders for my ass.
(screams)
(splash)
- You've ruined it.
- Oh my God, what's gonna happen to her?
- She's gonna get sucked through the pipes.
- Ah!
Help!
- She's stuck, baby.
- It's her fat ass.
- Why?
- Great, now they're gonna sing.
♪ With a fat ass you can't do much with that ♪
♪ Oh sure you can walk ♪
♪ But that thing will be mocked ♪
♪ Keep making it bigger and that back's sure to break ♪
♪ You could've made it through that pipe ♪
♪ If it weren't for that cake ♪
- What did I just watch?
- Let's get on the boat.
- Miss Wonka, where you taking us?
- No.
- I feel like I'm on an acid trip without the acid, baby.
- What is this thing!?
- No.
- I want off!
I don't wanna be on this!
- No.
- This is the art performance I deserve!
- Stop.
We're here.
- The (beep) was that?
- This is where I invent candy.
Don't touch anything.
- If it's gum, I must chew it, baby.
- I just said not to touch anything.
- Mm baby.
- Whatever.
- What does it taste like?
- It's an explosion of flavor in my mouth.
This Monster is tasting steak,
green beans, and mashed potatoes, baby.
- It tastes like dinner?
- It's a full course meal.
- What's for dessert?
- Here it comes, baby.
It's watermelon!
A seedless watermelon!
- Um, what's happening to your skin?
- My skin is clear, baby.
- Your skin is green, bitch!
- What?
- I told you not to mess with the gum,
but I'm glad you did 'cause this is great.
- What's happening to her body?
(sing-screaming)
- She's turning into a watermelon.
- That's so watermelon.
- No, no more singing.
♪ Oh what is this bitch ♪
♪ What did you do ♪
♪ Chewing the things you were told not to chew ♪
- Stop.
♪ If you're so eager to disobey miss ♪
♪ Wonka will tell you to suck on this ♪
(yells)
- Is she gonna be okay?
- Yeah.
(distant explosion)
Nevermind.
This is a lickable wall.
- You can lick these fruits?
- Yeah, try it.
(licking and moaning)
- I don't taste anything.
- Me neither.
- I never said it tasted like anything.
- You said it was lickable.
- Anything is lickable.
- So we just licked a regular wall?
- Yeah, you looked so stupid.
(all coughing)
This is the fizzy lifting room
where we make fizzy lifting drinks.
- Can I have some?
- No, it gives you gas and you'll fly.
- Fly?
Please, can I have some?
- Fine.
(bubbling noises)
- You feel anything?
- De Nicki Minaj feels nothing.
I don't think it--
(yells, farting noise)
Ugh!
- Oh my God.
- What is that?
- My golden goose.
It (beep) golden eggs.
- Hi sweetie!
- Shut up.
- Is this legal?
- Nothing at this factory is legal.
- I want one.
- You can't have one.
- Okay, but I want one.
- It's not for sale.
- My ears don't work all of a sudden.
I want one.
- Okay, let's talk about it.
Have a seat.
(Mariah screams)
- I never liked her.
(music begins)
- [Wonka] No.
This is the wonkavision room.
(technological beeping)
- Oh, I get it.
Like television.
- No.
- I know all about television.
- This isn't television.
- Television sends millions of pieces above our heads
and puts them back together to make millions of more
pieces in our brains.
- What?
- I'm an expert on these things.
Wonkavision me.
(technological beeping)
Am I on TV?
Wait, what the (beep)
why am I so small?
- You didn't listen.
It's what you deserve.
- This isn't funny!
Put me down, you stupid bitch!
At once!
Oh my God!
- What is this?
- The wonkavator.
Get in.
I knew you'd be the last one.
You're special, De Nicki Minaj.
- I am?
- Yeah, that's why I'm giving you
the entire chocolate factory.
- Miss Wonka, you have no idea what this means to me.
It'll change my life!
- Just kidding.
- You motherf--
Go watch another one of our videos
and shout out to our member AtSilentHill.
♪ GM productions sim ♪
♪ GM productions ♪