Heya playa, is there someone that you have a crush on that you used to be closer with
but as time went on you kind of went your own way?
Well, that's the question that Sollid Rock asked me when he said "Hey Josh I have a crush
on this girl in my school but I don't have the courage to tell her.
We used to talk to each other in 2016 but now we don't have the chance to but we see
each other in school every day.
What do I do?".
So if you and your crush have grown distance with each other, I'm gonna teach you the techniques
to rebuild that with them so you can increase your chances of getting back together.
This is The Josh Speaks, you're watching The Josh Speaks.
For those of you that are new here, my name is Josh and every single Monday through Friday
I make videos sharing tips, ideas and stories teaching you how to be your best self.
When it comes to rekindling things with your old crush, you have to remember what you used
to have with them and work off of that.
For example, let's say you and your crush used to be a lot closer in the sense that
you two used to hang out together, you would talk more regularly, you would see each other
in the hallways or a class or you went to the same school or any of these kinds of grounding
positions that brought you and them close together.
That's going to be the foundation for how you can reapproach them and start a conversation
again.
So if you walk up to them and say something like "Hey I feel like I haven't talked to
you or seen you in a while.
Remember when we used to see each other all the time in class or in the hallway or we
just used to be better friends?".
Now I know, reapproaching them after a long period of time where the two of you didn't
talk to each other can feel kind of weird but reminiscing about an old time that you
guys used to share together will help get them on the same page as you in terms of reconnecting.
One of your concerns might be, well we didn't really have much back then.
Yeah, we talked every so often but we weren't really close or anything like that and now
I just never see them at all.
So what can I do?
Well, in a situation like that you're going to feel like you're starting from scratch
but you can still make reference to the fact that you used to see them a lot even if you
never really interacted with them simply by saying something like "Hey, I feel like I
used to see you around a lot more but we never really interacted.
But, you seem like an interesting person that I want to get to know."
If you notice there's a theme here to rebuilding what you used to have and that's simply to
make reference to it.
Now, you don't have to live in the past and constantly talk about old times and how they
were so much more fun.
Simply reference it, set the groundwork and then reapproach a new conversation with them
saying "So, what are things like in your life now?
What do you do for fun?
How can we hang out and get to know each other better?".
Now there are times where you used to be closer to your crush for circumstances that were
out of your hands.
Maybe you sat next to them just because, or you worked on a group project with them because
your teacher assigned you to.
In those situations, you don't really choose to have that relationship with them, it just
kind of naturally occurred.
And sometimes being in those situations forces the two of you to interact so you don't really
have to do much to have them talking to you.
But now things are different.
Now you have to rely on your confidence and your courage to approach them and talk to
them and that can be kind of scary.
So if you ask me, the underlying issue isn't that you don't interact with them as much
as you did before, it's that you don't feel like you have the confidence and the courage
to actually pursue them now on your own.
And maybe you're beating yourself up about it thinking man, I missed the golden opportunity
before and now the person that I liked got away.
Now it's going to be so much harder to talk to them so I'm just doomed.
Don't worry, you're not doomed.
Just remember what I said.
Focus on connecting over the things you guys used to share.
If you didn't have much that you used to share, just start from scratch, approach them and
reference the fact that you used to know of them back then but really focus on getting
to know who they are now.
Learn about their hobbies, learn about their interests, really show a focus in displaying
that confidence in wanting to get closer with them.
See if you have mutual friends that can connect the two of your together, see if you can approach
them at any given time and ask for their contact information or Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook.
Anything like that so you could keep the conversation going online.
There's still chances for you to develop something here but it takes that first initial step
from you.
What do you think though, do you have a crush on someone that you want to reconnect with
but you just don't know how?
Leave it in the comments section below and we'll talk about it.
If you have a question that you feel is a little bit more private, you can always shoot
me a DM over on Snapchat or Instagram.
I do my best to answer as many messages as I can.
If you found this video helpful hit the thumbs up button and if you're new here, subscribe.
But remember, check out the videos over there on the side if you want to keep learning.
Over there I'll talk about how to go after the girl that got away, how to rebuild connections
with people or just how to talk to your crush in general.
So check those videos out and I'll see you tomorrow.
As always, love and peace.