Hey, so my bathroom is currently covered in blood
I've been entering the mind of a stalker. For my final project at Uni I've got to make a music video
so I've decided to make a scary music video
And I had PJ, Lex, and my friend Mark round and we took loads of stalker pictures of Lex
[camera shutter]
I really should take them down since the cleaner comes tomorrow. He's gonna be like "oh my God what what is going on" and
probably call the police or something. I mean I took my shower curtain down. That was bad enough
He was like "Why don't you have a shower curtain?" cuz I used it to wrap up the bodies
He was like "neee!" He couldn't really take a joke so yeah, I should sort that out soon
and we also did some locations...yeah
I can't speak. We were digging graves and yeah this guy pulled up in his car with his girlfriend.
[High pitch voice] "Hey, you're gonna go kill some foxes or some badgers?" (Normal voice) and we were like "yeah" thinking he was joking
He wasn't joking he actually wanted us to go kill some badgers with him with the spade, so I was like "No
we're gonna go out this way now."
He's like, "but I know where all the badgers are. I know where all the badgers are."
His girlfriend just stood there like
eee eee eee
You can ask PJ or Lex if this actually happened just to prove that these encounters with crazy people
actually happen. So yeah, filming was fun. I got this t-shirt. Do you like it?
"Ahouuu"
Whoa
PJ: Tree tree tree tree sh- sh-!
[laughs]
Phil: Okay
Moving on. Do you remember in my last video when I talked about the amazing alarm clock that needs to be invented?
Well people actually invented it so thanks for that guys here are some pictures
*sings little jingle*
I also love whoever sent me these cat ears
Meow
Think I'm gonna wear them for the rest of the video.
[high pitch voice] Well I went to London yesterday
I got on the train about seven o'clock in the morning, and you know when you get on the train
And you look at all the people and you see one person you think please don't let that be my seat
Please God don't let that be my seat
I'm not discriminating or anything, but the guy had a shaved head massive scar down his face, really angry face
He was leant over both seats like this "I am a man
This is my manliness." When I sat down I realized he was picking up little scraps off the seat and putting them into his mouth
[nausea sounds]
[scream]
I couldn't see any new seats until I reached the back of the carriage
I saw a girl sleeping on her own, so I thought "okay I'm not gonna wake her up.
I'm just gonna sit quietly next to her"
[normal voice] Until I felt her hand stroking my arm
This is no joke
Sensual stroking going on. So I said "Um is this seat taken?", at which point she screamed.
[scream]
She was just looking at me in shock
As if I was the scary rapist guy from before and I was like "Oh my God, I'm sorry. What did I do?"
She was like "I thought you were my boyfriend! That's why I was stroking your arm!"
I was like "Oh, this is so awkward."
I turn around and saw her boyfriend was stood there like "What's going on?"
So I quickly stood up and left and sat next to an old man, and he was fine
Third time lucky. Always sit next to an old person
Advice from Chris Lomas who I was going to see which is the reason I went to London.
Yeah I was there for my secret mystery assassin meeting
[slow motion gunshot 2x]
We learned slow motion gun shooting. But yeah, I can't actually talk about it,
but if you're on Twitter and following me,
which you should be, you might be able to work it out
Hmm if I could raise one eyebrow right now, that's what I'd be doing. But it was a really good day
And we went out for food and Chris is really nice, and I want to be best friends forever
[speaks foreign language]
[ high pitch voice] Also I've [mumbles]
Um the first person post a video response dressed as a penguin having an argument with an angry monkey and
drinking lemonade and saying the following words:
monkey, doctor, scooter, Amazingphil, thunderstorm wins a prize
I don't ask for much, do I? It'll be a good prize, I promise. So I'd invite you to go and do that now. Okay. I'm going
Shit tree again tree again tree again! [laughing in background]
Bye
Music: [Circle of Life from The Lion King]