STEVEN: It was a beautiful morning in the neighborhood.
The sun was shining, the birds were chirping,
and my Uber was just outside waiting for me.
UBER: "Hi, Steve, this is Uber. I'm out front...
STEVE: Okay, cool! I'll be right out.
UBER: I'm by the park-where the parking garages are.
STEVE: Okay, cool. I'll be right out.
*Uber hangs up*
STEVE: Alright.
STEVEN: You wouldn't believe where I was headed.
Ever heard of Grace Helbig?
*Steve snort*
Yeah, I know!
I was finally about to get my big break by being on her podcast
and it was turning out to be the best podcast of all time.
STEVEN: At first, I was wondering why this man looked so familiar,
and after realizing this wasn't Anderson Cooper,
I remembered he'd beaten us at the Streamys for Best Directing.
Get off your phone you're accepting an award-!
I wasn't upset at all
The chemistry between all of us was palpable.
It was like we'd been friends for years.
And I was ready to be in the world's eye after this podcast debuted.
I was ready for fame.
Normally on our podcast, Cib and James interrupts me constantly and I'm never able to really speak my mind,
so being able to share all of my unfiltered thoughts without fear of judgment and being stepped over
was freeing, to say the least.
And just like that, my life was about to change forever.
I don't know why Cib's doing extra work around the office,
but the last thing we need is a receptionist.
I'm not the biggest fan of jealousy.
Actually, let me rephrase that.
I hate being jealous of others.
But I wish you could see the smile on my face looking at James,
feeling him yearn for the opportunity I had.
The backlash couldn't have been that bad, so I asked James to pull up the news report on his computer.
*suspenseful strings*
It was that bad.
But I was more concerned with...
James recommended I make an apology video.
Absolutely, something will. James has a skeleton walk-in closet.
Either way it was time to make my apology.
STEVE: I know I've made mistakes...
CIB: Big ones!
STEVE: I know I've let people down.
But what happens when you're given an opportunity to make a difference?
The backlash against the social media star...
...a very popular guy called...
Steven Suptic
...is in some hot water...
he's a complete and utter insensitive idiot.
...taking a break from daily vlogging...
Even he says his latest content was his biggest mistake.
STEVE: It's time to learn from the past as I get better and grow as a human being.
It's time I apologized.
*feedback*
STEVEN: Since I've never felt the need to make an apology before,
I put Cib in charge of writing my response.
Cib's had to apologize profusely
ever since the accidental cremation.
And it just got worse from there.
You know what? It's fine.
As long as there was a part in the script that said "I am sorry",
I could cut it together and it would make sense.
Cool.
The only thing I had left was Plan B:
Assume, after a month, everyone would forget
It's the only tried-and-true method that works every single time.
But I figured I would also read the rest of what Cib wrote just to humor him.