I feel so numb.
How could he do this to me? Why would he leave me like this?
Today is our 7 year anniversary
I can't believe how fast time flies. We met at a mutual friend's wedding.
I remember it like yesterday.
When the bride threw her bouquet over her head, I jumped to catch it
But I missed as everyone else was crowding around trying to grab it too!
When I came down, I slipped on my heels losing my balance and falling straight back
But, as fate may have it, he was right behind and caught me just in time.
Instantly, our eyes locked as he held me in his arms.
For the entire night, we spoke as if we had known each other our entire lives
We spent hours together and as the night came to an end, he asked me for my phone number
Just to see if fate really was playing a game with us, I told him that I would give him my number on one condition
If I spun a bottle and it stopped on him, then I would agree to give him my phone number
But you know, I guess there is no escaping fate
The bottle pointed directly at him.
And since then, we spoke to each other every single day
We had gone to celebrate a friend's love but instead found love ourselves
It's been 7 years since that day. I can't say it's been completely perfect.
These last few months have been difficult for us and we haven't really spoken as much as we used to
Still, we've made it this far together. Hmm, I wonder where he's at?
*Text Message*
*Sigh*
Well, if it was a surprise, it's not anymore.
I guess he just doesn't want to hear me complain about being late again
Like every year, to be honest, surprises are something we always argue about
I know we've been together for a long time, but I still try to surprise him during his birthdays and holidays
And without telling him
I know he's not the "romantic" type, but I just want him to try like other boyfriends
It's been an hour now. If I knew he was going to be this late, I would've told him to forget the surprise and just be here.
There shouldn't be THAT much traffic at this time. He's been caring less and less about us
I mean...
Before I could think any further, my phone rang
"Tom? Wha....what do you mean...?!"
My entire body went numb and all I could hear was a ringing in my ear getting louder every second
I never thought we would end like this
We planned our entire lives together.
Places we'd travel to, the home we'd build, the family he and I would create
I know I was hard on him but I only wanted him to show me how much he cared about us
I just want him back. I need him in my life
I don't know how I'm going to continue. It hurts so bad.
No! This can't be true.
We were just talking the other day
He said he loved me. That he had a surprise for our anniversary
I know he wouldn't leave me after saying something like that
He still has his post up! Tom hasn't left me yet. He still loves me.
It's all just a bad dream and everything will be back to normal tomorrow.
I'll call him, hear his voice, and everything will be fine.
Look at everyone.
They act like nothing ever happened! Like everything is okay and normal!
They don't care about him!
God! I can't even think right now! Everyone just pisses me off
Like that girl at work.
Obviously, I'm not in the mood to talk right now. Why can't you just leave me alone and stop asking if I'm okay?
And his mom and dad. They've never really accepted us being together, no matter how hard I've tried.
This is your fault! Look at the stress you've brought on to us!
Are you happy?
What if it wasn't them? Maybe it was my fault?
Those times we'd fight and I'd ignore his calls or how I constantly compared him to other boyfriends and how romantic they were
If only I could take that all back. If only I wasn't so selfish.
I never meant to do any of that to him.
I vow to never be that cruel to him again! I'll treat him better. I'll be more patient.
Just please bring him back. Please, God
Please just bring him back to me. I'll do anything you ask.
I don't remember the last time I had a proper meal or spent a day without crying missing you.
We all miss you
It hurts me so much knowing you're no longer in our lives
My chest hurts, my body aches, and the memory of your touch brings me to tears.
It's not the same without you in our lives
I know what the surprise was you promised me that night
Your best friend told me how much you saved and planned what you were going to say.
How you told your parents I was the one and that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with me
They found the ring in your pocket.
It happened so fast
You were on your way to meet me that night and tried to text me letting me know where you were.
Before you could send your message the accident happened.
It was a drunk driver that hit you
They rushed you to the hospital as quickly as they could, but it was too late
The doctors said you brain dead and there was nothing more they could do.
Together with your family, we pulled you off of life support.
I'm so sorry I rushed you
I shouldn't have said those things or told you to hurry.
The whole time, you were only thinking of me.
I know you love me.
It was the last message on your phone.
I love you very much.
You're no longer here and I'll always miss you,
but I know you're watching over us and everything will be okay
I promise I'll look after your family, help them, and visit you often.
It's not easy letting you go, and no one can ever replace you.
But I know you'd want me to continue living, explore, and create new memories.
This isn't goodbye because I know one day, we will be with each other again
Happy Anniversary, Tom