Hey everyone,
this week's video is something that worries a lot of us,
if we're older than the average person with an Eating Disorder,
can we still get help? What do we do?
Stay tuned!
So this week's video addresses the topic of being older and struggling with an Eating Disorder or Self-Harm.
Now I know, I've been hearing from a lot of you,
and if this doesn't pertain to you, you know, this video is very specific,
to all of those of you who have reached out to me and told me that you know,
you're married, and you have children, and you're an older adult,
and you feel extra shame on top of the Eating Disorder and the Self-Harm behaviours
than people who are younger.
And it feels, it just feels bad.
And the thing that I think I wanna say the most about this
is that there's no shame in it.
I know you're like, "thanks Kati, that helps a lot...",
but the truth of the matter is, is that Eating Disorder treatment is just starting.
I mean there are many people around the world who tell me that there aren't any possible options
for them. That the only option is to go into the hospital, and you sit in a bed,
that they don't have any groups, and people just come in and check on you,
and they just give you a bunch of paperwork to fill out that's supposed to like help therapeutically,
and that's not really treatment. You know what I mean?
And for many of you, you reach out to me and I'm like,
ugh, if you could only come to the States, I could get you into this program and I know that you could do better,
you know, so, Eating Disorder treatment has a long ways to go.
And probably when you were younger, there wasn't any around.
And when we don't treat something early-on, it will stay with us.
Because this is a mental disorder.
This isn't like, oh, I have a pulled muscle, it'll heal on its own.
If I just rest, it'll be fine.
No, this is a mental disorder.
And if you think about other mental disorders,
so, let's say we're depressed.
Can children be depressed? Yes, they can.
Can adolescents be depressed? You betcha.
Can adults be depressed? Yep.
Can like even older, older adults in like their eighties and nineties be depressed?
Yeah, they can.
Is there any shame associated with that? Not really. It's all the same, right?
We think of it is as the same.
And to be honest, from the therapeutic side,
I see Eating Disorders and Self-Harm exactly the same.
It doesn't matter if you come and see me and you're eleven or you come and see me and you're sixty-five.
Because it's the same.
So when I'm talking about Eating Disorders, I'm not talking about only the younger group,
I'm talking about everybody.
Because Eating Disorders are all about how we think, and we act,
in relation to food, exercise, Self-Harm behaviours and things like that, right?
So it's all about what's going on in here.
I know we talk "healthy mind, healthy body,"
but today it's mainly healthy mind,
because Eating Disorders, at the root of what they are,
are a coping skill to help manage emotions we don't like,
that are overwhelming, or experiences we've had that are the same,
they're overwhelming, we don't like.
So it's a coping skill.
And there's no shame in it being longer for us to get better,
or us being older when it takes hold of us,
it can happen at any time. Right? If a traumatic event happened to us,
and we never quite processed it, it's still gonna be there,
we're gonna try to cope in different ways,
and we may have an Eating Disorder.
But we're forty-five. Does that mean we're too old for treatment?
No, it doesn't. And I just want you to, I wanted really to remind you of that.
Because sometimes our Eating Disorder or our Self-Harm voice, whatever that negative voice in our heads,
it will use whatever it can to keep us trapped. So it'll say,
"You're too old for treatment. They'll laugh. You should be so ashamed you didn't get help earlier."
Blah blah blah. Tell it to shut the hell up. Because Eating Disorders are all the same.
No matter what age we are.
And you can even see that if you go to my website, you can see all the different posts,
and we don't know how old anybody is, right?
And it's all very much the same.
So, do not forget to subscribe to my channel.
Cos if you notice, sometimes I put out videos mid-week,
and if you haven't subscribed, you don't even know about it.
And I would encourage you, because I hear from a lot of people.
And if I hear from a lot, that means there's a lot more even out there struggling with this same issue,
and this same worry.
Share this video. Below there's a tab, it has a link,
I want you to share it to either your Twitter, Tumblr, Pinterest, Facebook,
I dunno, there's a tonne of different things out there.
So I would encourage you to share it so we can spread awareness about this.
Because I want everybody to know that Eating Disorders don't discriminate when it comes to age.
So we all deserve help and we're all the same. Okay?
Give this a thumbs-up if you like this video, that really helps also share the information,
and just keep working with me, and let me know if there's other video topics
you want me to, you know, touch on,
as we work towards a healthy mind,
and a healthy body.
Do do da ba ba do, do do da, I think that went okay.. sometimes I ramble...
gotta do the disco.. feel like moonwalking... maybe...
Ugh, my foot's asleep.
So I've been hearing from a lot of you that you've either been suffering from an Eating Disorder for a really long time
and now you feel like you're "too old" for treatment.
Or I've heard from some of you that just recently it started, and you've started feeling like you have an Eating Disorder,
but you feel like you're "too old" for treatment.
To be honest I know that a lot of treatment centres are for younger adults, I guess. There are adolescent treatment centres,
and then there are adult treatment centres, and "adult" starts at eighteen.
So a lot of the treatment centres that I have worked at, I wanna say the mean age was like 25 or so?
I know that for those of us who may be forty, or fifty, or sixty,
who knows right? We feel kinda left out. I mean that doesn't quite feel right.
Because I mean let's be honest, if we're parents of children that've already moved out,
and now we're in treatment with these kids that are like just outta high school,
that kinda feels bad, right? And you can't really relate, right?
I'm doing a lot of air quotes, sorry.
But we can't really relate to them, and we feel that age gap.
But to be truthful, in my experience in various treatment centres we've had people who were forty-nine,
fifty-five, fifty-seven, there was no age limit.
We wouldn't take anyone younger than eighteen cos we were an adult facility, but we had a lot of older adults in treatment.
And Eating Disorders know no bounds. They will take us whatever age we are. Right?
And if we don't get, I guess, take control of it and take care of ourselves when it comes on when we're younger,
then we can be older and have an Eating Disorder.
So what do we do? First thing I want you to do,
is I want you to look into different groups in your area.
Okay? Cos a lot of areas have Eating Anonymous groups, there's CBT groups, a lot of treatment centres
have groups that go on for the people who have "graduated" from their program,
and they'll have it on like Mondays/Tuesday nights, and they're free.
So you can honestly with a lot of them just ask, "Hey, can I join your eating group?"
And it tends to be older people there as well.
The truth of the matter at the very core of all of this,
it's all the same.
And I know you're thinking, Kati, shut up, it's not the same.
But it's the same.
And I bet if you read somebody's post who's sixteen and struggling, and you're forty-six, it's the same.
Our Eating Disorders are the same no matter what age we are.
I could honestly meet one of you and tell you exactly what I think your Eating Disorder is saying to you.
Because it's this mean, nasty voice.
Subtitles by the Amara.org community