What's up, beautiful people?
It is your homegirl, Ms. Shameless,
back with a Shameless Sunday.
I was off last Sunday.
I had a lot of catching up on personal stuff to do.
But she's back.
And I wanted to check in with you guys to know
if you would be down for either Facebook Live
or YouTube Live stream every other Sunday,
because the filming and the editing is a lot of work,
but it will give me some time off so I'm not
stuck on a Sunday editing,
and I can have a weekend to recharge
before I get back to my week.
But I really do love these inspirational sessions,
because you guys really inspire me in the comments below.
Seriously.
So you're inspiring me.
I know you guys are inspiring each other.
So yay. Thank you guys so much.
Does God hate me?
I used to think that God had it out for me.
When you are met with challenge after challenge,
it's like, do you hate me?
Don't get emotional.
But do you hate me?
Because I didn't do anything to deserve this.
And why me, and why does this person have it so easy?
And it used to bother the crap out of me,
especially when I was in my twenties,
because it was a series of things where
I got hit by a car twice in one year, and it was back to back.
I had no money.
I had such little money that I was not only eating
just ramen 99-cent noodles.
I was showering with a bucket and water from the drip water.
I did not waste water at this time,
because my water bill was so expensive,
and I couldn't understand why,
and I was like, okay, unplug everything, don't use water
excessively.
Come to find out my water bill, my hydro lines
were switched with my neighbor,
who was him, his wife and three girls.
So I was paying the water bill for them.
But anyways, at least I found it out.
But backtracking --
I had a series of events that were just working against me,
and I used to think that God hated me.
And I was like, wouldn't that be messed up, if God hated me?
If you hated me, it would be so messed up.
So I was like, either God really hates me,
or he's really putting me through some serious boot camp.
And that's when I started to read about all these people
I admired and I was inspired by.
And reading their stories was inspiring.
Oprah -- she's been through hell and back.
Jesus Christ, my number one inspiration.
Nelson Mandela.
Frida Kahlo.
Those are just a few, but their stories --
they had the craziest adversities.
Nelson Mandela was imprisoned for how many years
and became the first black president of South Africa?
Frida Kahlo became this prolific painter
who had heartbreak after heartbreak, amputee.
And they rose above it.
And if they can rise above it, what's my situation?
You know, being hit by a car all of a sudden
doesn't seem so tragic when this person has lost a leg.
Now, I'm not trying to say, look at other people's downfalls
to feel better.
But there's always something to be grateful for.
And I started to look at the world and God as,
okay, you're doing this to me because
you clearly want me to become stronger.
And I just don't want to.
Right now, I'm just -- I've had enough. I'm tired.
Let me freaking catch my breath and catch some sleep.
But then all that happens when you don't rise to the challenge
is, you put off the inevitable, and you put off your greatness,
because your challenges, your adversities,
the more heavy-weighted they are,
the more opportunity you have to rise above it,
to become this amazing, great person,
and not to say that you aren't,
but could you imagine if you looked at all of this
back to back, just shit show, as training?
And that's how I look at life now.
I'm just like, are you kidding me? Are you kidding me?
You want to make it this hard for me
when this person has it so easy?
But it's like the gym.
It could be easy, but at the end of the day I'm not becoming
any stronger.
I'm just wasting my time at the gym.
But if I am pushing myself, if I am like, this hurts --
this hurts not only here, but after the fact --
it's because your muscles are repairing themselves
and becoming stronger.
And if you don't have those challenges,
you are not becoming stronger.
Therefore, you cannot be this great that you could
potentially be.
So look at your challenges as an opportunity
to rise to the occasion and be great.
I have this saying that I always say: Life is like a slingshot.
It pulls you back to shoot you forward.
And that's entirely true, I believe.
I have to believe that.
I can't think otherwise, because yo,
that is a depressing life to live,
to think that this is one fat joke,
which it could potentially be.
[laughing]
But at least it's preparing me for something bigger and better.
And time will put everything into perspective.
So you will not see it now, and I don't ask you to see it now,
but know that it will come to pass,
and you will become stronger because of it.
And I think about all the people that have
been through so much,
and I just think this person can only be great
or they can allow it to destroy them. Either of the two.
But I like to take these challenges that God gives me
as God saying, "Drop down and give me five more.
Oh, you want to complain, trick?
All right. Give me 10 more. Give me 20 more.
Oh, you want to sit there and waste your time? Okay.
Let me know when you're done,
because you ain't getting any younger, trick."
[laughing]
So I'm currently -- right now, life is good.
I can always complain about something.
But it's hard. It's really, really hard.
And if you do have it easy,
you got to give yourself more weight
if you want to become stronger.
You have to give yourself challenges.
There's no way to grow if you're not being challenged.
Challenge yourself, maybe not through heartbreak or anything,
but even that, even a heartbreak is going to prepare you
for something better.
An accident. An illness.
These are things that are awful.
I think you should honor where you are,
and if you're upset, be upset,
and if you're sad, be sad.
But then get back up.
I'm so -- I am so curious to see where I'm going to go,
because he be putting me through it, okay?
He be putting me through it,
and I am so excited to see where I go.
And I just have to put in the work.
I have to put in the time and dedication.
I have to work so much harder because my cards that
I was dealt were not -- they were shitty cards.
I was dealt a hand of shitty cards.
And this person was dealt a great hand,
and that just means you have a head start.
So why don't you use it? Use it.
Because if you don't, I'm-a catch up to you.
And that's basically what I do.
So I'm hungry. I'm ready.
God does not hate me.
God doesn't hate you, if you believe in a God.
God wants the best from you and is going to push you,
is what I believe.
Comment below and let me know
if you are feeling the burn.
And if you aren't, you do know what needs to happen,
but you're avoiding it, I think.
So let me know what challenge you're avoiding
because you're afraid you can't rise to it.
Let me know in the comments.
What are we at?
When I was going through my freaking divorce,
I remember I was sobbing on my bed crying
because I was so heartbroken,
but at the same time I was just like --
I was crying because I was heartbroken, and
I was also crying because I was so grateful.
I was so grateful that --
because I know now that I'm like,
you're not trying to destroy me; you're trying to help me.
Because years ago, ten years ago,
I would have thought you were really out to get me,
and woe is me.
The world is conspiring against me.
And that's a real selfish point of view.
And sometimes you need to be selfish, so be selfish.
Embrace it.
But know that you'll become stronger because of it.
So now when shit happens, I cry. I'm sad. I'm depressed.
But I'm also thankful.
And that's the only thing that gets me out of my slumps,
just being thankful.
Because there's always something to be thankful for.
Thank you for my hands.
Thank you for
my freaking mouth that doesn't know how to shut up.
Thank you for everything, Lord.
Thank you for my family. Thank you for my friends.
Thank you for being able to live in this country.
And on top of the thanks, then I ask for more.
I ask that you look over these people that are lost.
I ask that you help the people that
desperately need your help.
Help them.
Or help me so I can help them.
Life isn't easy. Don't give up. Keep going.
Hoo.
I'm going to go to the beach and then go to church, okay, guys?
Remember to do you, be you, and stay true, boo.
Oh, she is back at it again.
Be shameless.