[clip] Caterpie, you're mine!
[Adam and Mark] (Various ahs and oohs)
[Adam] Triple hit!
[Adam] Just hold it closed, with your hands.
[Adam] Sit on it.
[Adam] I'd just --- [Mark] Put it in your butt.
[Adam] Oh my God. That was easy.
[Adam] (creepy laugh)
[Adam] I'm a pro.
[Mark] I caught a Pokemon, that was so fucking weak that all you had to do was throw a ball at it.
Adam: It was basically dead.
[clip] Ash catches a pokémon!
[Adam] Oh! Well he just did... so... episode's over I guess.
[clip] Ash, you're acting like a --- ugh!
[Adam] Whoa, was that about to be a racist slur?
[clip] Just keep it away!
[Adam] You're prejudiced.
[Adam] Awww!
[Adam] It's so cute!
[clip] Come on Caterpie, climb up on my shoulder. [Adam] It's so cute!
[clip] Come on Caterpie, climb up on my shoulder.
[clip] Nryah!
[Adam] (laughs)
[Adam] "WRAAH!"
[Mark] "Mmm. I see something I like."
[Mark] "That booty."
[Adam] Oh my God.
[Mark] "Yeeeaaah, Gurl."
[Mark] "Let me get a look at them gam-gams."
[clip] You think Caterpie's disgusting?
[Mark] D'aww.. [Adam] Ahhh..
[Adam] Yeah, this is like Mark trying to get women.
[Adam] Rubs up against their leg until they run away.
[Mark] Why do they always run?
[clip] It's so gross!
[Adam] She's so racist!
[Mark] Look where her hand is. Too low!
[Adam] (laughs)
[Mark] (laughs)
[Mark] He doesn't seem to mind...
[Mark] (giggles)
[Adam] Do a little booty dance.
[Adam] What?
[Mark] There's an entire episode of Pokémon that's this...
[Adam] I don't think those sounds are in Caterpie's name either.
[Mark] Has he even said- [Adam] (nondescript sounds from Adam's mouth)
[Adam] I'm scared.
[Adam] (laughs)
[Adam] "Ahh... I wanna be a moon someday!"
[Adam] "It's okay. We're all gonna die, nothing matters."
[Mark] (laughs)
[Mark] "Look at those stars; you're nothing."
[Adam] (laughs)
[Mark]"You're less than a speck." [Adam] "Insignificant."
[Mark] (laughs)
[Adam] The moon turns into the sun?!
[clip] What is this thing doing sleeping near me?
[Mark] What is this thing, using the same toilet as me?
[Adam] Why is this thing using the same water fountain as me?
[clip] Wow, a Pidgeotto!
[Adam] Whoa? [Mark] Oh wow!
[clip] Pidgeotto: An evolved form of the Pidgey.
[Adam] It's very wild.
[Mark] Wild level: Very.
[clip] Pokeball, Go!
[Adam] 'Should maybe weaken it a little.
[Clip] You don't just throw a Pokéball and capture a Pokémon.
[Adam] Well, it worked for Caterpie.
[Adam] You don't get it!
[clip] Quit picking on Caterpie, okay!? And now ---
[Adam] I'll punch you in the fucking MOUTH!!
[clip] Who's that pokémon?
[Adam] Oh! [clip] Who's that pokémon?
[clip] Who's that pokémon?
[Adam] Why is it ones we've seen in the episode!?
[Mark] Charmander! [Adam] It's...
[Adam] John Stamos.
[clip] Hi, I'm John Stamos; one of the most handsome men you could think of, off the top of your head.
[Mark] How do you like this?
[clip] Caterpie!!
[Adam] You just gave it a death sentence.
[Mark] It's literally like throwing a worm at a bird, and being like "kill it!".
[Adam] I know. [Mark] It's literally like throwing a worm at a bird, and being like "kill it!".
[Adam] You just saw it eating worms.
[clip] Pikachu! Thundershock, now!
[Adam] Oh now you're listening to me, okay.
[Adam] Yeah, boi!
[Adam] Sit on it!
[clip] Birds eat worms, Mr. Pokemon Master.
[Adam] "I don't have a dad; nobody taught me anything."
[Mark] (laughs) [Adam] "I don't have a dad; nobody taught me anything."
[clip] Koffing! Sludge attack, now!
[Mark] Ahh, fuck!
[Mark] Ohhh, god!
[Adam] Gross! [Mark] Ohhh, god!
[Mark] Bukkake!
[clip] Don't let them have Pikachu, understand?
[Mark] "Whaaat?" [Adam] "What?"
[Adam] "What did you mean?"
[Mark] "What's happening?" [Adam] "What's a Pikachu?"
[clip] Now, Caterpie, you're my only hope!
[Mark] Misty has, like, two fucking Pokémon. [Adam] I know. What are you doing Misty?
[Adam] You have a Goldeen, and I'm pretty sure you have a Starmie or something.
[clip] What's that? It's a bug! A measly little bug!
[Mark] "A fucking bug!"
[Adam] (laughs) [Mark] "A fucking bug!"
READY?
[Adam] Bitch! GO!!
[Adam] Oooohh! [Mark] Oooohh!
[Adam] (laughs) [Mark] Oooohh!
[clip] Beaten by a caterpie?
[clip] That really bugs me!
[Adam] Echh! [Mark] Urrgh!
[clip] We did it!
[Adam] Misty really did not pull her own weight, just like the last episode. She was holding his cart.
[Mark] Oh oh! My Caterpie is broken. Gotta put him down!
[clip] So, why don't you two make up?
[Mark] Mmm, make out! [Adam] "Why don't you two want make out?"
[Mark] (Slurping noises) [Adam] "And give it a kiss?"
[Adam] "Maybe it'll give you a string shot, if you excite him enough."
[Mark] "Yeah, touch it."
[Mark] AAAAARRRH!! [Adam] Eeeeeerrh!!
[Adam] You excited it too much!
[Adam] That's disgusting!
[Adam] Oh my God!
[Mark] Wow! A single touch, just like me.
[Adam and Mark] (laughing)
[Mark] Ahh, I'm sorry. Well, that's 50 bucks!
[Adam] It didn't evolve from the battle, it evolved from getting stroked by Misty.
[Adam] And her --- [Mark] It got hard.
[Adam] It really did! Now it knows how to harden.
[Mark] "It's my dream to get hard. Yeaaah!" [Adam] (laughs)
[Mark] (laughs)
[Adam] I just wanted that girl to touch me.
[Mark] Which is his front and which is his back?
[Adam] I don't know. [Mark] I don't understand...
[Adam] He's talking to its butt... I think.
[Mark] "OH, FUUUU-!!"
[clip] I'll do anything, let's just get out of this forest!
[Mark] "Will you suck my dick?"
[Adam and Mark] (laughing)
[Mark] You said anything!
[Adam] Anything? [Mark] You said anything!
[Adam] Mmmm.
[Adam and Mark] (laughing)
[Mark] Oh no...watching Pokémon as an adult!
[Adam] It's great!