-Welcome, welcome, welcome to
"The Tonight Show," everybody.
Thank you for watching. [ Cheers and applause ]
Thank you for being here.
Guys, it's a very busy time in New York City,
because the UN General Assembly is officially under way.
Yeah. More than 100 foreign leaders are in town
to address the assembly, while some are just here
to pick up a fiancé for 90 days.
I love when the UN General Assembly is in session.
There is no greater joy than watching
the president of Romania walk into the M&M store.
Seriously, when else are you going to spot
the president of Latvia holding one of those restaurant buzzers
outside Bubba Gump Shrimp?
It's like, "Our table is ready. Let's go."
Of course, the main focus of
this year's General Assembly is fighting COVID.
Yep, nothing like holding a superspreader event
to tackle a pandemic.
There's actually some real concern about
the General Assembly turning into
a superspreader event, because -- and this is real --
the UN is using the honor system to check vaccinations.
-Ooh! -What? The honor system?
I don't even trust the honor system
when they give out candy on Halloween.
It's like, "Please take one.
Oh, I know you're going to take it.
Honey, they took the bowl.
We don't even have a bowl anymore."
Next, the UN is going to be like,
"We believe further conflict with the Taliban
will be avoided thanks to our latest pinkie promise."
The first leader to speak this morning
and address the pandemic was none other than
the unvaccinated president of Brazil, Jair Bolsonaro.
Yeah, that's like attending a weight-loss conference
and hearing, "Please welcome our first speaker, Colonel Sanders."
After Bolsonaro spoke, President Biden
then made his address to the UN General Assembly.
It was the first time he spoke to a room of full of
world leaders confidently knowing
that they didn't have him on mute.
Yeah, Biden talked about the pandemic, climate change,
and the withdrawal from Afghanistan.
When he watched, former president Trump was like,
"Pssh! I got way more laughs than him.
Way more laughs."
People are talking about this.
Today, the U.S. Space Force
unveiled a uniform prototype for its members.
Finally. Look at this.
Hmm.
Right now, every New York City doorman is like,
"Are we in the Space Force?
What?
That's what we're wearing."
Can we see it again?
It looks like a line cook being yelled at by Gordon Ramsay.
"Go to space with you, donkey! Go to space!"
Seriously, by the time you button up that jacket,
the space war is going to be over, you know?
Yep, that is the new uniform, until Jeff Bezos
buys the Space Force and turns it into this.
Yeah, I love that. He looks...
[ Applause ]
He looks like a mash-up of Buzz Lightyear and Woody,
doesn't he?
Here's some good news.
Johnson & Johnson announced its COVID booster shot is
94% effective when given two months after the first dose.
People who got the J&J were like,
"Yeah, that would have been nice to know about three months ago."
Actually, everyone who got J&J was like,
"We already got boosters.
They're called Moderna. Yeah."
Well, this is great.
I saw that Google Meet -- Google Meet
is going to start automatically adjusting webcam brightness
in users's browsers.
Yeah. And it's not the only new feature they're adding.
Take a look at this.
-We here at Google Meet are excited to announce
a brand-new feature to make your experience better than ever.
That's right -- when you click "New Meeting,"
it will take you directly to Zoom.
Google Meet -- at least we're not Skype.
-Yeah, isn't that amazing? That's amazing.
And, finally, a pair of 107-year-old sisters in Japan
just claimed the title of world's oldest identical twins.
Yeah, and just to creep people out,
they stand in the hallway of their retirement home and say,
"Come play with us."
Guys, as I said before, this week, the UN General Assembly,
with leaders coming in from all over the world,
is happening.
They're gonna give speeches. They're gonna meet each other.
But, sometimes, when you meet new people,
it can be hard to break the ice,
which is why a lot of leaders come prepared
with their very own "getting to know you" icebreakers.
I'll show you what I mean.
It's time for "Tonight Show Icebreakers."
-♪ "Tonight Show Icebreakers" ♪
-First up, we have British Prime Minister Boris Johnson.
His icebreaker is, "Which fork do you use to comb your hair?"
-Yeah. -Yeah. It's a nice icebreaker.
-Yeah. -Gets you into the conversation.
Next up, we have Latvian President Egils Levits.
His icebreaker is...
-Good one. -This is just icebreaking.
-Yeah, just break the ice.
-Next up is Finnish President Niinisto.
His icebreaker is, "Sorry, you might not recognize me
without my Joker makeup."
That's interesting. It's an icebreaker.
-Yeah.
-Here is Prime Minister Bennett of Israel.
His icebreaker is, "Do you like my resting kissy face?"
[ Laughter and applause ]
-[ Smooching ]
-Up next, here is U.S. President Joe Biden.
-Oh. -His icebreaker is...
-That's his icebreaker? -Wow.
-Wow.
-Next is Estonian President Kaljulaid.
Her icebreaker is...
[ Laughter and applause ]
Next up, we have Prime Minister Modi of India.
His icebreaker is, "Why does Macy's keep offering me
a part-time job for the holidays?"
[ Laughter and applause ]
-That's a good icebreaker. -Yeah.
And, finally, here is Brazilian President Jair Bolsonaro.
His icebreaker is, "I'm unvaxxed, sashed,
and ready to get trashed."
That's all we have for "Tonight Show Icebreakers."