Linda was wrong about the engagement,
and there was only one way to find out.
There's our special snack-maker!
Can you believe we've been sitting here
without a single chip and/or dip?
And Murray pulled out a bag of uncooked rice.
It'll do in a pinch, but my teeth aren't thanking me.
Linda Schwartz stopped the proposal.
See? Everything works out if you just do nothing.
No. This is a bad thing.
Like not having snacks.
I'd even eat a tomato like a piece of fruit.
I once closed my eyes and ate a radish
while thinking about a pear.
It doesn't work. The mind has limits.
Adam, maybe you have some info you'd want to reveal?
Did you know a zucchini is actually a berry?
What's that about? Not fun food facts.
Fine. [ Sighs ]
Mom, are you positive the proposal is off?
Because maybe everything's fine.
[ Sighs ] My Schmoopy-angel.
Always looking on the bright side.
I'm gonna go call the shore house and see.
It's pretty -- pretty quiet here, huh?
[ Phone ringing ]
Oh, and now some noise. What a day, right?
Hello? Hey, Schmoo.
Just checking in.
Anything fun or joyous you'd like to share?
A bird flew into the window.
It looked dead, but then it took off
like an hour later.
Yeah, such dramatic creatures.
So, uh, Geoff said something about a surprise.
What's that about, fool?
I don't know...fool.
[ Exhales sharply ]
I kinda thought my surprise
was gonna be something special,
but he's acting squirrelly.
Oh, wait, he's coming over right now,
and he's extra sweaty, for some reason.
Oh, my God! It's happening!
Hey, so, um, I-I know I promised you, like,
a big surprise, and I'm -- I'm sure
you're wondering what it is.
So, here goes nothing.
Yes! It's like I'm there!
I told you. It always works out.
Erica, you mean everything to me.
He'll probably mention me later, but so far, so good.
Life with you is like a party in my heart.
But why just party in my heart,
when we can party at your parents' beach house?
Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!
Who wants to split a beer with me?
I saw a pelican!
So, this is my surprise?
Hanging with your friends and Johnny Atkins?
And Carla, bitch.
It's just a party at our beach house?
Oh, balls. Yeah.
Giant balls you could've stopped.
Hey, I know that bro.
Yeah, I invited you. Right.
Then happy birthday, champ.
And I'm not calling you champ 'cause I don't know your name.
Is it Glenn? It is not.
And it's not my birthday.
Are you calling me a liar, Glenn?
Okay, Mom, I should go.
"Glenn's" in trouble.
Damn it, Murray! He's not proposing!
Barry? Geoff!
To Joanne? To Erica!
But Barry is? But Barry is what?
Proposing! To Erica?
To Joanne! Stop confusing me.
Stop confusing me!
Allow me to explain.
Bill and I are famished.
It's actually gettin' kinda rude.
Okay, can someone please tell me
what the [bleep] is going on?
With my hopes of a happy ending fading,
I had no choice but to step in and set the record straight.
And those are the six standard plot devices
of any romantic comedy.
So, what you're saying is that Geoff isn't proposing
because he thinks Erica doesn't want him to?
And it was Joanne who didn't want a proposal from Barry.
And he didn't want to propose to her in the first place.
And it all started because Mur-man is a loving,
yet disinterested father.
It's effortless.
Wait, Barry, you weren't gonna propose to me?
One day -- after I become a wildly successful doctor,
emcee, and multi-sport professional athlete.
So, like, next summer. [ Scoffs ] This is upsetting.
But Jo-Jo, you didn't want him to propose!
A girl still wants to be asked.
Then let's make it happen!
I'll do a super heartfelt sham one right now.
No. I want it to be surprising and romantic,
and then I'll reject you.
Enough. The only thing that matters now
is getting Geoff back on track.
What do we do?
Well, at this point in a romcom,
someone would tell the guy to "go to her".
But Geoff can't go to her.
He's already with the her he's supposed to go to.
Well, if Geoff can't go to her, I'll go to her.
No one's going to go to her without me.
And I have the ring!
I need to go to him so he can go to her.
And I'll stay put for all of us!
Not a chance. We're all going to her.
You can go to her in my church van.
You're not going? Oh, I don't like to get involved
in other people's romantic entanglements.
Everyone, to Vic's religious van!
Go, go, go!
Go! Go!