but first presents psychological tricks
that'll always give you the upper hand
number one social likeability whether
you are completely shy and closed off or
if you are the life of the party
you want to be liked it's part of our
basic instinct when you're liked you'll
be accepted there are plenty of people
who say that acceptance isn't important
but they're lying if you want to kill it
at a job interview if you want to be a
hit at the next party or if you just
want to be the most popular person
around there are a few tips that use
basic psychology to help you gain the
acceptance that you need number two
always be confident it's a scientific
fact that people like being around those
who are confident the confident person
is considered to be more trustworthy
more reliable and even more attractive
than those who are not confident if you
want to make a great first second and
third impression confident body language
goes a long way it's important to try to
be confident not arrogant it's possible
to be too confident and that can be a
huge turnoff
number three when first meeting someone
shut the color of their eyes when you
first meet someone make note of the
color of their eyes this isn't because
you'll need the information later it's
so you can give the perfect amount of
eye contact when you make eye contact
with the person that you're speaking to
it shows that you are confident and
interested this is especially true in
social situations if you hold the eye
contact for too long it can be creepy if
you make note of their eyes color upon
meeting it's about the perfect amount of
time for eye contact number for match
body language if you mirror a person's
body language it's a great way to gain
rapport you don't want to overdo it and
make it look like you are intentionally
mimicking them that can be taken as rude
and insulting if you are able to subtly
assume the other person's overall body
posture it can be very effective in
gaining their confidence and trust if
you're talking to a person who is
standing at a distance with their arms
crossed they might feel uncomfortable if
you're standing very close to them and
using open arm gestures number five use
the person's name upon meeting when you
are first introduced to someone you
should use their name experts believe
that if you use a person's name at least
twice during your first conversation
you're more likely to reinforce it in
your mind that will keep you from
forgetting the name the next time you
speak another reason to use their name
is that it could make people like you
more a person likes to hear their own
name it makes them feel important
number six pretend that you are
comfortable if you don't like crowds or
if you don't like meeting new people you
should hide your feelings about that
it's best to pretend that you are okay
with the situation if you have anxiety
about meeting others you can avoid
anxiety by tricking your brain into
thinking that you're comfortable if you
pretend that you already know everyone
you will make you appear more at ease
and that will make you extremely
likeable number seven check out their
feet when you first approach a group of
people take a look at which way their
feet are pointed if they turn their feet
toward you when you approach it means
that you are welcome if they turn their
bodies or heads towards you but their
feet remain pointed away you may not be
all that welcome this may sound like
something that you would learn while
watching a program on the animal kingdom
about the gorillas or the ring-tailed
lemur but it actually is very common in
human behavior as well if they don't
point their feet towards you it doesn't
necessarily mean that they don't like
you you may have interrupted a private
moment though or just approach the group
at an inopportune time if that happens
just walk away casually and join another
group or pretend that you're taking a
call number eight stay silent let them
talk
if you're talking to someone and they've
not answered your question in full or if
they have not come around to seeing your
point yet don't butt in if you stay
quiet it will compel them to keep
talking now to give you a chance to hear
them out and see their point when you've
done that there's a chance that they'll
be more open to hearing your point
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number nine find something you have in
common there is a psychological
phenomenon called the halo effect this
is where a good impression in one area
will influence their impression of you
in other areas as well this is something
that you can use during a job interview
a date at a party or any other time that
you need to make a good first impression
if you can find something that the two
of you have in common right off it can
cause them to warm up to you quickly it
doesn't need to be something major
either it could be that you both love a
certain movie that you have the same
pair of shoes or that your families are
from the same stage
number ten choose your seat wisely if
you're about to sit down at a table and
you think that you might have a
confrontation with someone you should
sit beside them if you sit across the
table they're likely to feel threatened
if your position is less oppositional
things at the table should remain calm
and cool this is something that you
should remember the next time you sit
down in the conference room or even at
the Thanksgiving table number 11 ask for
a favor it might sound crazy but this is
one of the best psychological tricks
that'll always give you the upper hand
the first person to discover this
phenomenon was Ben Franklin he conducted
an experiment we asked several people to
do him a small favor he found that
people were more apt to like him because
their brain has told them that they do
because they'd already done a favor for
him when you ask a person to do a favor
for you it doesn't need to be something
major either like asking them to help
you move or ask you for a ride to the
airport it can be something simple like
asking them to pass you a napkin or
asking the time
number twelve if you are nervous chew
gum you can trick your brain into
calming yourself down if you're feeling
nervous
our brains are trained to feel safe when
we are eating if you are nervous about a
job interview or an audition
you should not chew gum during the
interview or audition
instead chew the gum while you are
waiting to help you calm yourself down
when it's your turn though swallow that
gum or discreetly spit it out and you
should kill that interview or audition
number thirteen give them validation
people have an instinctive need to be
heard and feel validated if you really
want to impress someone when you're
speaking you should rephrase the things
that they just said it shows that you
care and that you really are paying
attention number fourteen understand
your friends better by paying attention
when they laugh a psychological study
was performed that showed that when a
group of people laughs together they
will glance at the person that they feel
the most connected to if you want to
know who's sleeping with who in the
group follow everybody's gaze while
they're laughing you want to know who's
the most popular and the leader of the
group
check those glances number fifteen do
something thrilling if you're going on a
first date and you want it to go great
do something exciting the hormones
released when you are excited scared or
afraid can help you and your date create
a bond this is a great way to get a
second date
number 16 don't avoid touching touching
someone is a way to create warmth and
intimacy if they saw something funny and
you laugh together it's a great time to
touch their arm with your hand you don't
want to touch them in a creepy way of
course if you type someone for your own
self gratification well that can come
off as offensive and inappropriate just
a simple tap on the shoulder or arm is
more than enough number 17
nod your head if you really want someone
to agree with you it's possible to trick
them into doing so when you're talking
try nodding when you nod your head when
you're speaking the other person might
not along with you that can trick their
brain into thinking that they actually
agree with you
number 18 keep your hands warm when
you're going into a social or
professional setting make sure your
hands are warm most people know that a
firm handshake is important but you
might not know though is that cold hands
can make a poor first impression before
you walk into the room warm up your
hands
but you don't want to warm them up too
much if your hands are sweaty that can
make a bad first impression too number
19
if you want to be remembered be first or
last if you want to stand out during a
job interview you want to be either the
first person to be seen or the last it's
a very rare occasion that a person in
the middle is remembered as much but
scheduling your interviews ask to be the
first person or the last person to be
seen if at all possible
number twenty voice your requests as
choices people prefer to be given a
choice rather than an order for example
if you are collecting money for charity
rather than asking someone to donate ask
him if they want to donate $5 or $10
they'll be more likely to donate if they
are offered a choice
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number 21 enthusiasm is contagious if
you want someone to be on board with
your idea you should be very
enthusiastic about it
if you seem excited they will be excited
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