Hello and welcome! My name's Heather, I'm a Registered Professional Counselor and a certified
life coach and today I'm going to be analyzing the argument between LC, Diamond and Amber from the
Netflix series Love is Blind. Before I get started, make sure to subscribe to support this channel and
so I can put more analysis videos like this. Okay let's get to the show.
Okay so there was a lot of anticipation around whether or
not Mark will show up to the anniversary party. There's been some history between him and LC.
I think they were dating recently there were allegations of him cheating on her.
Everything that I talk about in this video is just based off what we see from the show.
I'm not here to diagnose anyone, I'm not in a session with them and of course we're only
shown what is being edited or it could also be possibly scripted, so let's just keep that in mind.
LC mentions that she's attracted to a certain type of guy. It could mean that this type
of attraction that she has for these types of guys can stem from something that's much deeper. We find
certain characteristics or personality traits attractive and so we go from one relationship
to another even though they're with different people the relationship itself is the same. An
important way of breaking out of this cycle is to have a strong relationship with yourself.
So having a good understanding of why you're attracted to these types of people. Usually
it's not a coincidence if we keep falling for the same types of guys and that's what LC is saying.
She's saying that she doesn't know why it keeps happening. Usually it does stem from the individual
themselves. Now I'm not saying specifically this is what's happening to LC. Maybe she does have
a lot of bad luck, maybe it is a coincidence. We often repeat the relationship dynamics that we
see between our parents growing up and so we also take on these different beliefs or messages
around love and what relationships should look like. And this is something that I spend a lot of
time on with my clients in my sessions because these old patterns and these old beliefs show
up in our everyday lives and also in our future relationships.
We see amber
taking Mark's side and we saw in season one that they were actually really close.
We also see Diamond, you know giving her perspective and sharing her thoughts about the
situation. It's clear that she wants to be there to support LC and she thinks that what Mark
did was wrong.
So we even see that Diamond is very in tune with what's going on in the conversation she
said that, "Amber, you look very uneasy". It could also be a way for Diamond to try to get Amber
to open up a little bit about what her side or her perspective is on the situation, as she knows that
she and Mark are close. She might also be trying to say this as a way to invite Amber to provide
more information about what's going on for Mark.
So Amber doesn't believe that Mark owes LC an apology and that's
her opinion. It could be that she's very loyal to him and his friendship. It could be that maybe
she doesn't understand the whole situation from LC's side of the story. We don't really know
how open she is to listening to that. It could also be because she doesn't really like LC
or she still feels a sense of competitiveness because LC and Barnett dated in the pods.
For the sake of argument let's say that they did have this conversation that LC is
talking about. Maybe Mark, at that time, was also being honest. Maybe at that moment he also didn't
want to date other people. So how could it be handled differently? Well, Mark could have been
honest with LC and told her, "Yeah actually, I am seeing other people" or "I'm thinking about seeing
other people in the future" and then in that way he could have given LC all the information for her
to make the decision of whether or not she wants to continue to see him. It seems like she's wanting
some validation from Amber to acknowledge the fact that she was hurt and it seems that LC
specifically wants Amber to admit that what Mark did in terms of lying to LC was wrong.
In Amber's situation, you don't have to agree with someone in order to validate what they're feeling.
She could have just acknowledged that LC was hurt and she was upset about the situation, but
she doesn't have to throw Mark under the bus. Maybe she's also afraid that Mark's going to see this and
Mark's gonna get upset of what Amber would say, so Amber's being very cautious and very careful and
she just wants to make sure that she's 100% on Mark's side because that's the friendship that
she wants to continue to invest in. So I don't really know what's going through Amber's mind,
but it looks like she doesn't really care. You can see just from her facial expressions that
she's not really invested in the conversation, she doesn't really want to understand the other points
of view. It looks like she's just in her mind formulating her next argument.
What?! So what does that even mean? Is she implying that LC isn't a grown adult because she believed
that she was having an exclusive relationship with someone who said that they were in an exclusive
relationship? It doesn't make any sense.
LC is trying to remain friendly and we see that she's smiling she's trying to laugh.
Her reaction could be a way for her to de-escalate the situation so she doesn't want everyone else
or herself to get angry or to get mad. And maybe that has worked for her in the past and it seems
like this is something that she's trying to do now. It can also be a way for her to self-soothe.
I'm guessing she's feeling triggered, so her heart rate might be going up, her breathing is
getting shallow and she's preparing for a fight. For Amber to say that LC getting COVID or
them dating during a pandemic is irrelevant is very dismissive.
It sounds like she just
knows what Mark has told her, so she's not really getting the whole story. She's just trying to
I guess defend Mark in this way because he's not there. There's a bunch of seagulls outside...
But yeah, she's acknowledging that there's different sides to the story - there's Aubrey's side.
And yet, she's not listening to LC's side of the stor. In her mind, she's already made up who is
right who is wrong and she's gonna take Mark's side, which again is totally fine, but if she's
just gonna take Mark's side then she doesn't have to be there in the conversation at all.
It's possible that they all gave COVID to each other if they were all
hanging out with each other and dating each other, but it seems that in Amber's mind, LC
and Mark weren't dating.
Amber is basically throwing blanket statements out there.
Maybe she knows that Mark was wrong, but she doesn't want to disagree with him publicly and
so she has no leverage in the argument. It would make sense as to why she appears so dismissive
and also just roping in generalization like oh [ __ ] happens and oh everyone was taking a risk.
Yes!
Thank you, Diamond! That's kind of what was going on my mind as well because the conversation and the
argument is just really confusing and this is sort of what arguments are like in real
life you know we try to find any anything that we can use to prove the other person wrong and
it gets very messy and convoluted. Diamond, thank you for bringing it back on point.
Amber is trying to basically blame LC for the fact that she got COVID. It was her fault for
believing Mark when he said he was in an exclusive relationship with her. Diamond has a
really good point and I think basically she's just trying to get Amber to see LC's perspective. I
mean, it's definitely not a bad approach to get Amber to put herself in LC's shoes and to
think about what LC went through. We see Amber trying to shut down Diamond by saying, "it doesn't
matter, it doesn't matter, it doesn't matter" and she just basically stopped listening at this point and
she's making it very clear that she doesn't want to hear what they have to say. And maybe it doesn't
matter to Amber, but it matters to LC because she's the one who went through this she's the one
who she feels got hurt, she was the one who was wronged, she was one who is lied to, so of course
it's gonna matter to LC and you can't just tell someone that it doesn't matter when it does matter
to them. I guess my question for everyone here is, "What is the point of this conversation?" If you're
trying to convince other people to change their mind it's most likely not going to happen. Chances
are they're just going to continue to dig their heels in their own points of view and what they
believe and they're less likely to be open to what other people have to say.
Now Amber is saying that the only thing that
matters is if you're married, which is insane. It makes no sense because even when you're
dating someone, if you're courting someone - if you have an agreement and trust and commitment to be
in a relationship with each other that counts for something. What do you think about Amber's argument?
Let me know in the comments below!
Again, Amber could empathize with LC and what she's going through and she could empathize
with her feelings and that doesn't mean that she disagrees with Mark. And we've seen this before
like she's very rigid in her ways of thinking. It could be a form of cognitive distortion so
it's like an all or nothing thinking or a black and white thinking.
So basically Amber's
argument is that if you're dating someone you should expect them to lie to you and to hide
things from you and to not treat you well because the only thing that matters is once you're
married. In this situation, LC is wrong because she should have expected the worst in people
and expected Mark to have lied to her about being exclusive. If that's the case, then she shouldn't be
upset with Jessica for talking to Barnett two years ago and Jessica had every right to try
to break up the relationship because they weren't married and she should expect the worst in people.
That's basically the argument that she's making which is very hypocritical and makes no sense. I
don't know if she's just saying that because she literally has nothing else to leverage in the
conversation and she doesn't really have anything other good points to bring. It would be interesting
if this is something she actually believes, so why would she believe something like this? Maybe Amber
has been hurt repeatedly in her past relationships. Again, I'm not saying that this is what Amber went
through in the past, but these are just some things that I'm speculating and that comes to
my mind when I see this type of reaction and the things that she's saying. Amber could have said,
"You know, that's not what Mark told me, but if that's true that's a really terrible thing that
you had to go through LC and I'm sorry that you had to go through that." She could have just said
that. The whole discussion would have probably been over and they could have gone to celebrate their
anniversary.
It doesn't make sense to distribute the blame if Mark was
the one who wasn't honest. Again, we don't know if he was or if he wasn't, but if he wasn't honest
with LC about dating other people then it's not LC's fault that she was lied to. Now it
is important to take responsibility for your own actions, but in this case if you
were lied to or deceived to you can't really blame yourself for not being a grown adult
or preparing for the worst if you are wanting to trust someone in order to build a relationship.
You know when it comes to conversations like this sometimes people just have to put their egos aside
or take a step back. Again, if you don't want the conversation to escalate into a full-blown
argument chances are you might have to just try to validate and also try to see from the other
person's perspective and that usually gives them an opportunity to also hear and understand you.
Again, my question is: "What are you trying to get from this conversation?"
Maybe Diamond and LC thought that they could
convince Amber to talk to Mark and to have Mark apologize to LC, but that's definitely doesn't
seem like it's going to be the case at all. I don't even think that was really on the table,
especially since Amber went into the conversation ready to defend Mark and unwilling to listen to
what LC was going through.
So Amber is saying that Mark has a completely different life now is that.
Is that a really good argument for him to not apologize to LC for what he did? I guess in her mind she
feels that Mark, you know, moved on and this is the furthest thing away from his mind he's got
important things to worry about because I think he is now having a baby with this woman that he saw
while he was with LC. That, I can imagine can be even more hurtful for LC to just have
Amber throw that in her face. Maybe this is also Amber's way of telling LC to
just get over it. It was so long ago and it's not a big deal anymore and therefore LC should
stop making it into a big deal, but it's a bit hypocritical hearing that from Amber considering
that she's not forgiven or moved on from the whole Jessica situation that happened two years ago.
And from my understanding, what happened between LC and Mark was in the span of the last few
months from them filming this. How does she expect LC to get over this if she's not
able to get over the fact of Jessica talking to Barnett? It's pretty clear in my other video if
you haven't watched it yet, I do go in more in depth about Amber and Barnett and Jessica
so make sure you check that out afterwards. She's definitely not over what Jessica did
and Jessica also apologized. She gave what seemed to be a very genuine apology publicly
to Amber and Barnett in the reunion episode. Amber seems to have an issue with that still
At this point, you just have to get up and walk away because
you're not really getting anything from the conversation. You just kind of have to realize
when you have to cut your losses. Don't forget to like this video
and also subscribe to my channel to get more analysis videos. Thank you so much for watching
and I look forward to seeing you in the next one. Until then, be kind and love yourself.