Thank you.
Thank you for all that noise.
I assume you're making noise.
I have no idea.
But if you're living with kids, someone's screaming, I'm sure.
We have been away from our studio for so long,
I'm starting to forget a lot of the things that I've done over.
The past 17 seasons, we have tape thousands of shows.
I remember about five of them, I think.
We're going to put my memory to the test
with a new game I'm calling, Did I Do That?
[MUSIC PLAYING]
Here's how it works.
tWitch is going to ask me whether I've done something
on the show.
If I guess right, Andy has to pay me $20.
Andy, are you wearing the same shirt as the last show?
Yes.
Thank you for pointing that out.
All right, if I guess wrong, Andy only has to pay me $10.
All right, here we go.
OK, Ellen, did you ever make cotton candy with Cameron Diaz?
I'm just going to say yes.
I have no memory of it whatsoever, but--
Yeah.
--I'm going to say yes.
That's a good guess.
Yes, you did.
Really?
You did.
This is basically death right here.
Well, no it's not really.
Here, yeah.
Give them out.
[CHEERING]
All right, so--
You're doing really good there.
You can actually just put your hand in there and do it.
Supposedly, it's safe.
Really?
Yeah.
Who told you that?
Would I put you in danger?
I have zero memory of that.
I have zero memory.
Are you sure that was us?
I think that was me.
I don't know why we would have done that.
Why was that content to make cotton candy?
Why do we do most of the stuff we do?
I ask that while there's a mop behind me
with Mary's head on it.
OK, what else?
OK, Ellen, have you licked Bradley Cooper's fingers?
Yes, I know I've done that.
Yep.
Let's roll it.
Look at the carrots.
It's important to taste those.
They're delicious.
Mm.
[CHEERING]
Yes, I do remember that.
Yeah.
From a certain angle, I can now see in there, Ellen,
for the first time.
Oh, good.
You get to enjoy the show.
Well, not quite.
But I see shadows.
OK.
My neighbors asked me the other day
if I was going to ever let you inside.
And I said, no.
My neighbors are concerned for you.
Oh, God.
Yeah.
Oprah?
No, she's not.
OK, what else, tWitch?
OK, Ellen, have you played ping pong with The Rock?
I've played ping pong with a lot of people there,
but I don't think I've played ping pong with The Rock.
I'm going to say no.
You're doing great at this game, Ellen.
No, you have not.
No.
Yeah.
OK, what else?
Did you dance through the audience
while wearing an eye patch?
No.
Maybe.
Maybe after I did a bit or something, or a sketch.
Well, yes or no?
Yes, I think I did.
All right, let's check it out.
Let's see.
I am going to be rich.
Look at this.
[LAUGHTER]
[CHEERING]
You can barely tell I'm wearing anything.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
Yeah.
It's hard to dance with an eye patch on, it turns out.
Yes.
If you see someone dancing with an eye patch on,
give them more credit than you would.
OK, what's next?
I'll make sure.
Did you get into a pretend tickle fight with Gary Busey?
Boy, it seems like that's something he would want to do,
and I would say no to.
But I'm going to say no.
Yeah, no.
You did not.
No, you didn't.
Oh, good.
Good.
You're eight for eight already.
I'm pretty good at this.
Yeah.
What else?
OK, did you once call me Cliff instead of tWitch?
I'm sure.
I'm sure that happened.
I have a hard time speaking sometimes.
That's true, right?
This is true.
I remember this one vividly.
I always try to guess where people
are from when they're dancing.
There was a guy dancing with Cliff--
you're not Cliff.
Your name is not Cliff at all, is it?
Do you have a middle name or a nickname?
It just came to me.
So I feel like maybe it should be.
I love when you misspeak because you just own it.
Yep.
You always own it and just go with it.
Yeah.
People make mistakes.
I made a mistake.
And, as I said, perhaps that's a nickname
that you don't know about.
Yeah.
That's how you play Did I Do That?
Andy, you owe me $1,400
Wow.
Yeah.
You got it.