- One of my favorite stories.
Can I say the story of when I, when you came...
- No.
(laughing)
- When mum came into the house...
- I have the right to stop you.
I claimed my space to answer my own question.
- I'm Zenny and this is my mother.
- I'm Isabel, and Zenny is my daughter.
- Hi, I'm Francis, and this is my mum.
- It's a her.
- And today we're playing Never Have I Ever.
- Have I ever, yes I have,
cause I don't know what you're going to ask me.
And I've never done this before.
(sighs)
(laughing)
- What's that?
- I haven't.
- Yes, I have, okay.
- It's like, it's like a picture in your underwear.
- Okay.
- And then I sent it to a few girlfriends.
- I don't think my mom knows what that is.
- I know what it is.
- Underwear, trying to show my six pack.
- Which six pack?
(both laughing)
- Also I know Camilla has, my sister.
- I have never.
- She's never done it, she's never done it.
- I have not lied to you, mum.
- You've not lied to me?
- No, I've never lied to you before.
- Yeah, sure.
- I promise.
- Good.
- Did you lie to your mum?
- All the time.
- What did you lie to your mum about?
- Well, I have lied about everything now.
No, no, not everything.
(both laughing)
- Yes, I told her I was in the place where I wasn't,
and I got caught in town.
- Oh, you got a caught?
(laughing)
- What did you lie about?
- I've never lied to you like, like really.
I just speak truth to you.
- Yeah, I've definitely lied to you.
Sorry.
- That's all right, mothers expect these things.
- I have.
- I have, and it was clothes.
And I'm sorry mom, but the fashion sense was not sensing.
- When you do the little gift boxes and I'm like oh,
so I open it up and it's like an umbrella and plasters.
And I'm like oh,
I thought it was going to be something,
like it's useful,
but I thought it was going to be something fun.
- I like all the gifts my mum gives me.
I'm very appreciative in my thanks.
- Me too.
- What gift do you ever give to me anyway?
- I've always liked everything you've given me, dear.
Don't worry.
- Oh, all the time, all the time.
(record scratching)
- What do you mean all the time?
- I do all the time.
I've been watching porn since, since I'm married.
- I have never.
- Sorry, people, I have,
I had watched porn when I was younger.
- Oh, you okay?
- I know, I know you've done that one because...
(both laughing)
- We were a group of us that used to go, say no names.
- I've got porn at home.
(laughing)
- It was a group experience.
We didn't, it wasn't a physical group experience,
but we all kind of like watched together.
It was all visual.
Excuse me, let me clarify.
(both laughing)
- Yeah, I have, not on VHS obviously,
but yeah, I can admit that.
- What, what, what, what...
- On the internet.
- Really, I never seen internet porn.
- (indistinct) porn in my car, in my car!
- I thought you said the questions weren't bad.
(laughing)
- I haven't.
- I have, I've tried them, and I'll never do them again.
- Huh?
(laughing)
Know you want to.
- I'm a massive stoner,
so it is what it is.
- I have never tried drugs.
My dad always told me if you tried Indian hemp,
which is what it's called, where I'm from, you'll go mad.
- Never, I'm a good boy.
Outstanding citizen.
- I'm a good woman.
- I haven't.
- No, neither have I.
- Oh, good.
- Once you were stopped by police while we were in the car.
I don't remember when we were...
- Oh yeah.
- Was it little?
I'm going to shut up.
- It was in the car and Chad had taken out the car seats,
and so and then when we saw the police coming
we tried to hide her at the bottom of the seat spot,
hoping the police couldn't see that.
(laughing)
- Oh, I have.
- Oh God, no.
- What's that?
- It's when you swim naked.
- Uh!
(laughing)
- This was at night and no one was there at all, in the sea.
- Okay.
- We just didn't have any...
- You didn't have any clothes on.
- We had clothes on, we had swimming trunks.
I'm not gonna go to the sea in my...
- So you prefer to go naked.
- But no one was around.
- Okay.
(both laughing)
Okay!
(inhales)
- No.
(laughing)
I have not.
- Constantly.
(laughing)
- No, I've never done that, man, come on.
(laughing)
- I haven't, but...
- But?
- It took a while to be happening, but I haven't.
- Okay, one of my favorite stories,
can I say the story of when I,
- No!
(laughing)
- When mum came into the house to use the toilet.
- I have the right to stop you.
I claim my space to answer my own question.
I'm 52, I've had four children,
I've got a weak pelvic floor, so things happen.
I'll say no more than that.
- When was that?
- This was like school times
when I couldn't afford anything.
I used to steal, you've never heard this story.
- You couldn't afford anything, but you (indistinct)
What was we gonna do for you?
- I haven't.
- No, I haven't.
- Never, unless we're counting the pick and mix food.
But I would never do that now,
because COVID, now I don't know why
I didn't think of that at the time,
that's disgusting, but yeah.
- I have never shoplifted.
- You never, you never shoplifted in your life?
- Uuuh.
(record scratching)
- You see, you see.
(laughing)
- I'm a (indistinct) girl, I can hold my drink.
We don't black out.
- Never.
- All the time.
Not all the time, that sounds bad,
like I'm some sort of alcoholic.
- I can't remember.
- You can't, so that means...
- I remember...
- If you can't remember, that means you blacked out.
- June 21st, I'm going to black out.
I'm telling everyone that now.
- Okay, I have as well.
Can't remember super well.
- I've never cheated.
(laughing)
- You've never have been caught.
- Never have I ever.
I have cheated a lot, and I never got caught.
- You've never got caught or you have?
- Never.
- I confess, yeah I do confess.
(laughing)
- You told me I shouldn't.
- Huh?
- You told me I shouldn't.
- You shouldn't tell them.
No, I didn't say that.
- Huh?
No, I didn't.
- You were like, why did you tell that?
(both laughing)
- I don't cheat.
You guys cheat more than I do.
- Mum, no, you cheat at Monopoly.
I'm sure that you're the one that taught me to cheat,
whenever we played.
- I don't cheat at Monopoly.
- I've never been caught, so.
- I've never been caught either.
- I will never do it again, I promise.
A black man don't cheat.
- Ey, okay!
(laughing)
- I'm clean as they come.
- I'm queaky, queaky? I'm squeaky clean like I said, so.
- I know, I haven't lived.
I need to recreate my bucket list.
- That was fun.
- It was fun, yes, it was fun.
- I now know my mum is a porn watcher,
and there's porn somewhere in this house.
- It was nice, it was a nice experience.
- Yeah, I'm sweating drops.
This way too hard, but I don't know why.
(laughing)