- Oh, I would've been here on stage
every night with a guitar in my hand.
- Oh, nice. You play the guitar.
- No, I don't.
( chuckles)
- Hello.
- Hi.
- Hey.
- It's nice to meet you.
- It's nice to meet you.(laughs)
- Why not both?
- Okay, what is your name?
- I'm Ben.
- I think everybody on the planet is crazy
and crazy breaks down into two categories.
You have homicidal crazy and suicidal crazy.
- I can read you one of my songs.
- By all means.
- I thought this would be the summer that I would sink
because I was barely making enough for one soul,
but God sent me a job to save my wings
and now I'm raking in more cash than the leaves of fall.
- Have you ever done that in "Hot Ramen challenge"?
Like the two times spicy.
- Yes I did that on my stream before.
I did that on my stream and then--
- How'd you deal with that?
- It was bad.
(laughs)
- It was like, my asshole was burning.
- Oh no. Oh no.
- I said to her, I said,
"Listen, it's either me or the cat?"
And she got rid of the cat.
- So she broke up with you because,
- She didn't break up with me.
- Oh no, she got rid of the cat.
- She stayed with me.
Come on, I don't got to lose to a cat. Pretty crazy.
Get out of here. No, I just like,
that's a deal breaker for me.
- Oh, wait, wait, wait. So you made her get rid of her cat?
And then you broke up with her?
- Well...
- I have no problems about how I eat. I chew very loud.
- Yeah.
- I mean it's because I enjoy the food. I don't care.
- So you're...(chuckles)
- Literally, my sister would be like,
"Why do you chew like that?"
- Oh, you like smack your lips and just....
- Maybe, because it's flavorful.
- Does that help you enjoy the food?
- Yeah.Taste that food with more flavorful-ness, mouth-ness.
You gotta go like...(smacks lips) because you can taste it.
Taste the the spices.
- Can I smoke a cigarette?
- Arg.
- I know I'm sorry.
- That's like one of my...
(laughs)
- I mean, it's not my pet peeve. I mean, you gotta do you,
but yeah, go ahead.
It's not like my hugest pet peeve, you do you.
It's fine. Yeah. It's one of my turnoffs,
but that's you right?
- Mmhh.
- If you want to text your mom right now,
you can totally do that.
- Yeah.So I think I'm in love.
- Yeah.
- I'm going to do something creepy.
Ma, ma, I've met the one.
- So you walked down the aisle in your white dress
and I'm sure Indian weddings are big to do.
I've seen, like, I know what's up.
Like you're walking down the aisle and you're like,
- Well. - No, I like, tell the truth.
Come on, don't well.
- You're fucking calling me out.
- Yeah.Say it.
- The best you could hope for is that
you don't have a partner that will harm you.
- Okay. I'm trying to follow you here, but,
- Okay so... - I think I need,
a little more explanation.
- Yeah. I've had a lot of trying relationships.
- It's a give and take and this is
what I learned so much about relationships.
Is that it's not about you.
When you find that person you're letting
a piece of yourself go and that's not easy to do.
- Oh my God, I actually don't believe that at all.
I think if you're with somebody that just like accentuates--
- You haven't lived in New York long enough.
- You, I don't think you've been in love then.
- I've definitely been in love.
- I like honestly...
- No, man, when you're--
- Because when you're in love,
you put the other person first.
- Yeah but that doesn't means a part of you like disappears.
- But how do you know you got divorced at 32.
- That doesn't mean I wasn't in love.
- And you didn't, you just told me you weren't in love.
- No, I actually said I was in loved, but I had doubts.
- Who says yes to getting married and you have doubts?
- This is called culture clash.
- So this is like an Indian thing.
I feel like it. You are going back to culture--
- It is.It's a very cultural thing to not understand,
like societal pressure on getting married.
Just admit that you've dated.
- No, I get that.
- My parents had an arrangement.
They met on their wedding day.
- You have to marry a man for the rest of your life.
Not your mom.
- So you're saying that --
- But you lied to a man, you lied to a man.
- I did. I did. And I was thinking--
- As long as you admit that.
- Yeah, of course. I'm not saying I did the right thing.
And I thought, you know what? It's not that--
- But you ruined eight years of your life.
- I didn't ruin it. I learned--
- You totally ruined it. You lied to him and yourself.
- Correct, I never said I didn't do it.
- You agreed to spend the rest of your life
with someone in front of friends and family.
And it was a complete lie. How could I ever trust you?
How would anyone ever trust you?