Hey guys.
Do you want to know what really makes me tic?
I'm going to share and bare my soul right here,
for you, my community, in this video,
so, stay tuned.
Hey, y'all. So, Rebecca Zung here and
I just wanted to take some time to be with you
in this video and just kind of share
what made me who I am, and what my why is,
why I do what I do.
Because, I think it's really important for you guys
to understand why
I make all these videos and why I do what I do,
because, I had a very successful, extremely busy
law practice for a very long time and I don't have to do this,
I certainly don't have to sit here and
make videos and I certainly don't have to sit here and
teach people about narcissism and do these things.
But, I want you to know why I do all of this and
why I talk about the things that I do
because, there's certainly something
that's motivating me and certainly something
that's having me talk about all of this, and
I want you to know a little bit more of my backstory
so that you can understand a little bit more about that.
So, I was born, I'm half Chinese and half German,
My dad is Chinese. He was a doctor.
My mom was a nurse at the time,
I’m German by descent,
but she was born in this country.
My dad was actually born in Shanghai and
he came here when he was 14 with his family and
they actually met in the operating room and
I was raised mostly, or completely, actually
in Northern Virginia, outside of Washington DC,
a few metropolitan areas, but not really all that
progressive when it came to mixed people or asian people.
I mean, I was growing up in the 70s and 80s
at a time when Vietnam was a thing, and
there were kids in my class who had come over
from Vietnam, and Vietnamese refugees were a thing and
there was still a lot of backlash actually
about like a lot of things, asian honestly, and
so people don't really understand anything much
about asians and it wasn't really that popular.
I mean, now you see everybody and
their brother has like tattoos of asian characters,
I mean, obviously there's been some backlash lately,
with the asian hate and all of that.
But you know, you see way more mixed couples and
much more acceptance than there used to be.
But, there were not mixed-race kids when
I was growing up and I was definitely bullied and
I did talk about a lot more of that
in my video called “I don't normally share this”,
you can check that out if you'd like.
So, I did end up going to a boarding school
for high school, which pretty much saved my my life, I think,
because I really never felt like I fit in public school and
then I did excel there, and
I graduated second in my class from high school,
I started college, but it didn't really feel like I fit in a college,
so, I ended up dropping out of college,
I got married at 19, I had three kids
by the time I was 22, then I moved
to Florida and marriage wasn't working out,
but I did end up finishing college and
I was teaching in inner-city schools,
I've got these little kids and teaching in inner-city,
Fort Lauderdale, marriage not working out, and
I'm like making almost no money, I got to figure out,
What am I going to do with myself?
So, I'm like, survival mode, survival mode.
So, I realized I find out that,
local law school has a night program,
I start there, University of Miami, then I transferred
to University of Miami,
which also has a night program.
I go there. I finished there.
I'm just trying to put a roof over my kids,
had put food on my kids table,
like trying to help my kids,
I meet my husband in law school,
we start dating, and while I'm still in law school,
I also got a job with a firm, that is like one of
the largest, most prestigious, family law firms in Florida and
that's how I ended up falling into the family law practice.
So, I ended up exceling there and
high-end family law, is a very specialized type of
family law practice because you're dealing with
very high-end businesses, very complicated businesses,
complicated trusts, it's not like regular divorce practice.
You really have to understand
retirement assets, different types of currencies,
different types of retirement plans,
all sorts of different things.
So, I do that, I go out on my own,
I have my own practice, I had another child,
by the way, I had a fourth child, I have a fourth baby
who's now just started her first year of college, and
I wrote my first book which took me all over, and
I did a lot of television, did a lot of things with that.
Then, I started speaking on negotiation,
I started speaking on negotiation to really build my practice
because nobody wanted to hear me speak about divorce,
so I spoke on negotiation from every rotary
to pretty much from Tampa to Marco Island.
I've spoken to pretty much every medical association,
all over the place and then I just really realized
at some point, once I built this amazing practice and
I had the largest family law practice,
I set out to do that, and I realized,
you know what, I'm actually an entrepreneur,
I'm actually somebody who has meaning to my life.
I have a mission for what I'm doing and I'm like,
I feel like I'm just on this gerbil wheel, and
so few a years ago,
I decided to merge my practice with a couple
of other guys who are fantastic, by the way,
I decided to do something else, and
that's when I wrote my second book called
“Negotiate like you M.A.T.T.E.R” with Robert Shapiro and
started doing some other things.
That's where I ended up kind of falling into
the clutches of doing a very short-lived small business
with a covert narc who shall remain nameless and
I also realized that there was a covert narc
in my life in as an extended family member and
that’s when I started really learning a lot
about narcissism and that is when I realized,
I could actually start teaching,
not just about negotiation, but about how to negotiate
with narcissists in general, and as an INFJ,
which I've talked about before with you guys,
I'm an INFJ in the Myers-Briggs personality test,
I have to have purpose,
I have to have meaning for my work, and
so I love this forum because I love being able
to connect with so many of you every single day.
I hear from so many of you about how my work,
my mission has changed so many of your lives and
that is my why.
You guys, are my why aside from my children
of course, my family, definitely my first why but then,
you guys are right there, right there
I mean, you're my hero, you're my why,
this is what made me who I am and
I feel like all the way from the bullies on the playground,
through to learning about negotiation,
through having narcissists my life, and
all the narcissist I’ve dealt with in my law practice and
all the way up brought me to like this,
it was like all the stars aligned, and
brought me to this moment,
where here I am, to this place and
on this course and so I want you to think about
all the things in your life, all the things that
just seem like debris and horrible stuff, and
maybe they're all just aligning,
it becomes something that becomes your purpose.
Maybe they are actually becoming your building blocks
to something that you are going
to be able to use to help others,
to be able to inspire others,
to be able to become your pension,
to be able to become your purpose.
So, I want to know what you think that might be
so comment below, let me know,
let me know what you think.
If you like this video
give it a like, give it a share, and
drop me that comment, and of course, subscribe
and hit that notification bell.
Thanks so much for dropping by.
If you want to join my free private Facebook group,
you are certainly always welcome to do that, and
you're certainly always welcome to
grab my free “Crush my negotiation” prep worksheet
at winmynegotiation.com.
As always, I'm grateful for you and as always, please,
remember, today's a great day to start negotiating your best life.
I'm Rebecca Zung.
Thank you for listening.
Thank you for being my why and for stopping by.
I will see you in that next video!