Are the benefits of staying single
as a man enough to outweigh
the benefits of not staying single
and when should you absolutely stay single?
Let's explore.
With the rise in third wave feminism
and the decline in available high quality
women in the dating market
plus the incredibly
inequitable effects of divorce on men,
it's no wonder plenty a good fella
are choosing to stay single
and I don't blame them.
The interesting part is
while I am a dating coach for men
who typically want to be in a relationship
or improve the relationship they're in.
The advice I’m going to give you for
if you choose to say single
is going to be remarkably the same.
Because the things that I suggest
on making changes to your life
are things that you will actually appreciate
regardless of what any woman thinks.
And a lot of those things are the same things
that I do suggest to guys who want relationships.
They are things that are going to make you
happier in your own life
no matter what.
And if you do want a girl
well, if you build it they will come.
What I mean is if you build a life
that you are happy and content in
and that you're proud of.
Then that's going to be attractive to women
if you happen to want to be with a woman
later on down the road.
Now, obviously you're watching this video
because you kind of question whether or not
that's even a good idea
and are women worth it.
Well, let's look at that.
If you're new to my channel
my name is Anna Jorgensen
welcome to just the tip Tuesday.
So, here's the thing,
when we take actions towards
making improvements in our life or in ourselves
our sneaky tricky brain releases
this stuff called dopamine,
which is a feel-good neurotransmitter.
I think I've said, called it
a hormone in other videos,
but it's actually a neurotransmitter.
Same thing is like when you're winning in a game
if you're gaming or scrolling
or what have you these dopamine hits
make us feel good.
And help us want to continue
moving forward in whatever we're doing
whether it's something productive
like maybe going to the gym
or working on a career.
Or if it's unproductive like
gaming for days on end
without doing anything in your life
that's responsible
or scrolling endlessly on social media.
So, without further ado
the benefits of staying single as a man.
One, no woman no cry
yeah, if you don't allow
yourself to be vulnerable and fall for a woman
she's not going to be able to break your heart
there is definitely a benefit to that
especially if you've already
been through the heartbreak.
You know what that feels like
and you know it sucks.
And the reality is that over 60% of unions
end in separation.
And over 85% of the time
it's the woman who initiates the breakup.
Plus if you choose not to pursue a woman,
then you also won't have to deal with
the inevitable rejection you're going to face.
Also, see my video on chasing versus pursuing
in case you're just still a little curious
about possibility of dating.
Two, no woman no pay
reality land is that
being in a relationship is expensive.
You want to do things together,
you want to go out on trips,
you want to go to restaurants,
you want to do activities.
And if you actually really
like the person that you're with
you do want to spend some money on them
maybe even buying them gifts.
If that's something that you
enjoy doing for your partner
or that she enjoys receiving.
It doesn't mean it has to be expensive,
but anything that you purchase
with moolah costs money.
As well you never have to worry
that you're going to lose everything
you've worked so hard for in a divorce.
And if you want to stay single
but still get some.
Well, there's always going to be
a troll up on speed dial
who will you know be available to you.
Whether you choose the uhh... Currently illegal route
and just go for a gold digging ***
or other possibilities maybe Vegas.
I don't know, I’m not saying,
not saying I support this
I’m just saying there are options out there
that don't have to make you
sign on a contract like marriage.
And thanks to feminism
some women will even
give it away for free, conditions apply.
Number three benefit of staying single as a man.
Variety is the spice of life.
If you do choose to date women
but not get into a committed
relationship or marriage
you can date as many different women as you want.
You can go through a veritable
smorgasbord of selections
and not have to commit to any of them.
You can avoid judgment
and you don't have to answer
to anyone except yourself.
Also, wrap it up
because you probably don't want
unwanted surprises
like unexpected offspring.
Or other things you can get
when you don't wrap it up,
be careful out there wear a raincoat.
Number four,
time is on your side.
Okay, so time is on your side
you have time to do whatever you want
whenever you want with whomever you want.
And again, you don't have to answer to anybody
if you want a game all day
in the PJ’s you've worn for a week, go for it.
Leave your pizza boxes
with their concrete crusts all over the place,
sure thing.
Openly check out a girl's sister,
best friend,
or milf why not?
You can do whatever you want,
which brings us to number five,
say like brave heart freedom
minus getting your innards outer.
And then we're going to go over her
who should absolutely stay single
even if you don't think you really want to
or you're not sure.
So, freedom.
You're 100% free in your life
you answer to no one,
you don't have to make considerations
for anyone else
if you don't want to.
Because relationships do require consideration
even emotionally healthy people
have needs in a relationship.
And oh, I won you are the king of your castle
you are also... A little side note here
100% responsible
for any of the choices you do make.
But there is actually
some freedom in that as well.
Because you won't be able to play the blame game
or the no shame game on yourself,
which is actually a good thing.
When you are single,
when you are minus one
you have a lot more time, money,
and opportunity to make the best of your life.
Now, when should you absolutely stay single
let's say you're on the fence.
And you're looking for
the benefits of staying single as a man.
But there's a part of you
because maybe you're on my channel
that's like okay, um
but I’m still kind of digging on women
what... You know, should I or should I not.
Okay, here's when you absolutely shouldn't
you got to say no to yourself.
All right, number one,
newly single not ready to mingle
look if you have just gone through
a really hard breakup
or lost your loved one.
There's many different ways of experiencing that
and my heart breaks for you.
If you're not ready
it's okay to stay off the market for a while
and just honor your grieving.
You know, when things end
there's a grieving process
and you don't have to rush
into another relationship
and just ignore that.
You know, it's okay
to go through the grieving process
it's healthy to go through the grieving process.
It's okay to take some time
to be by yourself on your own.
I have done this, I did
a very, very extensive stint
being single for some of these reasons actually
and it was very good for me.
So, I do recommend it.
Next one, if you've been called a bitter pill.
So, let's say you broke up with
or someone broke up with you
or you've been rejected
or you're just freaking tired of chasing women.
Watch my video on chasing versus pursuing.
If you're bitter
and you typically say things like
all women are insert
any kind of negative adjective
then you probably
want to stay single at least for a while.
Because all women are thinking
leads to attracting those kind of women.
Again, we have confirmation bias
and we have cognitive dissonance,
which essentially means
we look for evidence
that support our belief system.
So, if you've had some really toxic relationships
or negative experiences with women
and you can't help but think or feel
that all women are whatever negative,
then you need to take a break
from being out in the world
because you're just going to get more of it.
And I would strongly suggest working on yourself
and doing things that will
improve your life in many different ways.
And actually my wake up to love program
helps all guys improve their lives
in many different ways there is
of course, a segment on get the girl
and understanding women.
But there are segments in there
where it's all about you improving you in ways
that are going to be meaningful to you
regardless of women and what things to change
or to work on and what things to be like,
no way man, I’m going to own that one.
Someone said that's a flaw
nope, to me that's not a flaw
I’m going to own that one
and if I stay single forever because of it
I’m okay with that.
So, anyways, if you're interested in that
I'll put a link at the end because here's the thing,
You know how there are women
who've had bad experiences
and they say things like all men are
pigs, jerks, misogynist, etc.
Are those women attractive? No.
So, it's the same in reverse
men who have really negative
feelings towards all women
and don't think there's any good ones left.
Are not going to be attractive
to the high quality women who are out there.
And yeah, they're scarce
so, are they going to go for someone who's bitter
or maybe someone
who's got a better attitude towards women?
Of course, it's going to be the latter.
So, until you can get back to a place
where you can at least be neutral about women
you should definitely stay single.
Number three, broker.
I'd say when you're brokering
a deal as in you are experiencing
some financial hardship.
Whether or not it's directly or indirectly
related to a previous relationship
like maybe you got shafted in the divorce
or maybe you didn't get shafted in the divorce.
But you just willingly spent all your loot
on some girl who really wasn't worth it
and now you're trying to catch up financially.
Well, you should probably
work on getting that sorted out before dating
because relationships do
cost money like I said before.
And if you find someone
that you actually really enjoy the company of
you are going to want to invest money
and finances in that relationship
not just in that person,
but in the actual relationship.
Number four, if you're desperately lonely.
Okay, now this one kind of might be a surprise
because if you're desperately lonely
you're thinking that being with someone
is going to solve that problem.
It actually doesn't
because when you're desperately lonely
you probably have some sense of
lower self-esteem or self-worth.
You might not feel deserving of the kind of woman
that would actually enhance your life.
So, if you're desperately lonely
you're not going to get a high quality woman
and you're just going to end up
adding more suffering and grief to your life.
Because you might just take whatever comes to you.
If any girl will have you
you'll be like yes I can have her...
She'll have me and I won't be lonely,
but you might not be lonely
but you'll be miserable.
So, you want to get past
the feeling of desperate loneliness
and again, my wake up to love program.
If this is for sure you
then my wake up to love program
is going to help you immensely.
And number five,
kind of the opposite to the last one is unsettling.
So, what do I mean by unsettling?
What I mean by unsettling
is that you absolutely
will not settle to settle down.
So, it's the opposite your standards
are so high for what you want in a woman
that she probably doesn't exist.
And or if you're here watching my video
and you're single
then you might have
to improve yourself quite a bit
for her to want to consider you.
Because I know this
you're not going to like this I’m sorry
don't shoot the messenger,
but if she's that high quality.
If she's a unicorn in the dating market,
she's going to have a lot of choices.
She's going to have so many options
that you'll have to stand out
from those other possibilities for her.
So, yes definitely
work on the things you can work on
but know that
there's no one out there that's perfect.
And if you're constantly looking for flaws
in the women that you're considering
or you just simply see flaws in everyone
like that movie Shallow Hal
if you haven't seen it, it's kind of funny.
Then it might be better
for you to actually stay single
and just date if you want to date women.
Or wait and work on yourself
so that if you do happen
to encounter the unicorn
then you will actually be
able to have the confidence
and the traits that
she might actually want in a man.
So, whether you
want to take a break from dating
or you want to completely go solo.
I highly recommend
that you work on figuring out
what's going to make you happy in your life
and start pursuing
actions toward those goals.
You should have goals about
what's going to make you happier in your life
and you should work toward those goals.
Working toward those goals releases dopamine
makes you feel good, makes you want to work more
toward those goals happy, happy,
joy, joy, win, win.
And of course,
if you want a step-by-step guide for
how to figure out what to work on
and what to accept in yourself
along with a bunch of other stuff.
Then definitely check out
my wake up to love program.
And yes, even guys who want to remain single
will definitely benefit from
the non-relationship modules,
which are most of them actually.
And a little bonus tip since you stay till the end.
Who should absolutely be in a relationship?
Oh, what,
that's an option?
You want to definitely work on yourself
or stick with the plan of figuring out
how to find, attract, and keep
emotionally healthy wonderful woman,
they are out there.
If you want a family
that's pretty much the only time
I'm going to suggest definitely having
a relationship as a goal
somewhere in your future.
Most men won't go to the
route of single fatherhood
like, they won't choose that
whereas some women do choose that nowadays.
But I really strongly believe
and statistics for incarceration
and all kinds of other things
also support the idea that
having two parents in the household
are incredibly important for a child.
I won't say too much more on that,
but you know it, you know it.
So, if you do want to have
a child in your future
then perhaps at some point in time
a relationship will be a goal.
It might not be right now
but maybe it's down the road.
So, all right,
what about you, what do you think?
Do you want to stay single
or do you want to just take a break?
Keep watching my videos
because then you'll be more mentally prepared
if you do choose to get back
in the dating world at some point.
All that stuff will be in there through osmosis
and you'll be more prepared.
And again, yeah,
check out my wake up to love program
there's 100% money back guarantee
within 60 days.
If for any reason you don't like it
so, yeah, check it out, check it out.
And yeah, just a big hug to all the guys
that have had bad experiences with women.
I know there's a lot out there
and I feel for you.
That's all I got,
that's all I got in that, see you next time.
(Music)