Hey everybody.
Happy Thursday.
And today I'm doing an FAQ video.
I gathered most of my questions this time from katimorton.com
And I also was on youtube answering questions yesterday and the day before.
So if you're looking for your question to be answered,
I've gone through and answered.
And I know a lot of you,
And the great thing about our community,
Is many people will know which videos I have already created,
And they can direct you towards those.
So that you can get the information that you want.
So today I have a couple of really good questions I think.
Oh, and.
I will keep mentioning this.
I may put out a video that is specifically to this.
I'm going to be at vidcon.
Hello.
So if you haven't got your tickets,
Get your tickets.
If you live in the Southern California area.
I will be there.
And I am also going to Elgin, Elgin.
I think it's Elgin, Scotland.
At the end of March for,
I'm going to speak at the Elgin Youth Cafe.
I'm very excited.
I'm going to be there for nine days.
So I go,
I come in, I think, on the, leave on the 21st.
And with the time difference I'm not really sure when I get there.
I think I get there the following day.
And then I leave the next Monday.
I think that's the 30th.
So I will be there for a long time.
So I will be planning a meet-up.
Stay tuned for that.
To make sure, I know many of you live in that vicinity.
And it can be a train ride or quite a drive.
But I will be there for a whole weekend.
So I'm sure I can set one up that will work for many of you.
Okay, without further adieu.
Let's get into the questions.
Now the first question,
It's a very long question.
I will put the full question in the description.
But I'm going to make it a little shorter,
So you get the gist of it.
For the video timing purposes.
So the main question she says,
'I wanted to ask you if it's possible that I made up my eating disorder.'
'I've had some struggles for some years ago.'
'Because I started restricting my food.'
'But for me it was totally okay. Sort of like a 'diet'.'
'And I don't have a clue why I started this diet. Because I was already underweight.'
'But it felt very right at the time.'
'The behaviour was similar to anorexia with restriction and exercising.'
'But not so much as other people's, not so obsessively days.'
'Some days I could even not care about it.'
So she goes on to tell her story about how this has,
You know, come and gone in her life.
And she was just curious,
She says,
'I'm not looking for an online diagnosis, but my question is,'
'Can a person just imitate eating disorder behaviour,'
'And confuse it with an eating disorder?'
Now someone in the community had told her about my,
'Disordered Eating vs. Eating Disorder' video.
And I would check that out.
Because that's kind of in root to an eating disorder,
When you have disordered eating.
But, no.
We cannot fake mental illnesses.
We cannot fake an eating disorder.
Yes, we can imitate some of the symptoms.
However, the important thing to remember is that it's what goes on in our head.
Did you start it because you wanted something from that?
Like, were you looking for more attention from your mom,
So you started doing these things because she wasn't taking you seriously.
Or were you doing it, you know,
For a period of time to get the attention of your therapist.
Or your teacher.
Or whatever.
Usually there is a purpose.
Maybe an ex boyfriend,
Who knows.
But it's not something that happened,
And we're using it as things get more stressful,
And we can't quit.
Even when we want to.
And that's just the difference right there.
Even if we're restricting.
And we feel like we're kind of 'imitating' a eating disorder.
The fact that she, this person in particular,
Says that,
'I wasn't even sure why I started this 'diet'.'
To me that's like,
Bom [Light bulb noise]
Eating disorder.
Because, if you had a conscious thought about it,
And that's why you started doing that behaviour.
And it was for a purpose.
Then maybe I would tell you, like,
I think maybe, you know, you're seeking attention through this.
And that's why you're imitating the behaviour of an eating disorder,
Even though it doesn't sound like you really have one.
But it sounds like you really have one.
And if any of you out there are feeling like,
'Well maybe I am imitating, I dunno, maybe I'm faking a mental illness.'
Chances are, you are not.
Do you know how hard it is to fake a mental illness consistently?
You can't do it.
You may do it periodically for a certain person's attention.
That would be when you actually are 'faking it'.
But I honestly,
I forget, I think they call it Malingering, I think that's the right word.
When you pretend to be sick when you're not.
And I don't believe it's even that common in the States.
I remember it being like less than one percent.
But anyway.
It's not very common.
Chances are, if you think you are struggling with something, you are.
Everyone's experience feels different.
Don't feel like yours has to be exactly like somebody else's.
But reach out and get help.
The more support we get,
Even if we feel like we're maybe faking it.
The more support we get around that,
The better.
Because usually we're doing things for a reason.
And it's good to find out what that reason is.
Okay.
So I will stop rambling.
Next question.
Sometimes I find I ramble.
I'm sorry.
'Hey Kati, you and your videos are amazing and have helped me so much, so thank you.'
Oh you're very welcome.
'I have recently been talking to my school counsellor,'
'About my eating disorder and depression,'
'And many of the other issues that I have been facing.'
'She assured me that all of the information I share with her is confidential.'
Which is true.
'But I have recently discovered that she has been sharing the information I told her,'
'With my coaches, other teachers at my school,'
'As well as calling my friends into her office to get information about me.'
'How do I bring this up with her? And how will I be assured that I can have a,'
'Helpful meaningful conversation without worrying about confidentiality?'
Great question.
Holy shamolies.
I had to do this one because I was like 'What? Wait, what?'
And I read this twice, three times,
To be like, is she serious?
First of all.
That is a complete breach of confidentiality,
And you could technically report your counsellor to whatever board.
If she's a school counsellor, you'd have to find out if she's an MFT, LCSW, what she is.
But it's all under the Board of Behavioural Sciences of your State.
You can report them.
Be like,'You are a jerk face.'
And that's not, that's not okay.
Secondly.
Everything is confidential up to a point.
If she's worried that you're going to harm yourself or someone else,
We have to report that.
That's more like, we have to call the police.
Or we need to call your parents or a close friend to take you to the hospital,
Because we worry about you.
Those are the steps that we take.
It's usually just take the least evasive steps.
Like the least sharing possible.
To get your client's needs met.
So that's ethically what I'm bound to.
And also legally.
Because I have to report it.
And do something about it.
But this is just,
I'm sorry, this is fucked up.
That's just the truth.
And I apologise to people who don't like that I curse.
You probably don't like any of my videos.
But, this is just so wrong.
I understand that she may have to share, if she worries about you.
I would bring this up with her.
And I would just mention.
I would say,
'You know, when we first started talking,'
'You let me know that everything said in here was confidential.'
'You know, I know that there are some limitations to that.'
'However, I have heard from my coaches and my friends. And some of my other teachers.'
'That you have been speaking to them about that. And it's just really concerning to me.'
And this is up to you, the ending of this is completely up to you.
You can say,
'And I would like another referral to see someone else.'
Or, 'Can you explain to me why you did that.'
And it's kind of up to you whether you continue seeing this person or not.
Because, I honestly,
If I knew my therapist was going around telling everybody.
It would be really hard for me to be honest and open and feel safe.
And that's the most important thing with therapy.
So I myself, personally, would probably try to find someone else.
But if you feel comfortable,
If she's like 'Oh no,'
And then she has a really good reason as to why.
Which I'd like to know why.
Can you let us know why if there was a reason.
And you feel okay about it.
Then you can continue seeing her.
It's your treatment.
It's your choice.
But that is messed up.
That should not happen.
Especially your friends.
Are you kidding me?
What?
Anyway.
So, I'm sorry that happened to you.
I promise not all therapists are weird jerkos like that.
We are good.
There are good ones out there.
We just have to search them out.
But definitely have a conversation.
Because that is against your rights as a client.
Okay.
Now I had a journal topic.
Thanks Lauren.
She shot this to me, I think probably a week ago.
And I flagged it in my email.
So I did not forget.
So thanks Lauren.
It was around Valentine's day and I know that that was a little while ago.
But it's still pertinent.
And it's still something that can really help.
If any of you out there are struggling with body image.
Depression.
Self esteem issues in general.
I hear this from you all of the time.
So know that you are not alone in this.
But this is a really really helpful journal topic.
And it's writing yourself a love letter.
And I will put the link in the description to it.
It actually came up on buzz feed.
And that's where she sent me the link to.
And it's a woman in LA acutally.
Hello.
I don't know where she is.
But she, every year, had trouble because she was sexually abused on Valentine's day.
And so every time Valentine's day would roll around,
She would have a really hard time managing, kind of her PTSD,
And all of the responses.
And the memory of the fact that this was the day that she was abused.
And so instead of focusing on that.
She decided every year to start writing herself a love letter.
And there are examples in this link.
And there are all sorts of goodies.
It's such a cool idea.
And it's kind of cool to think about it from, like an admirer's perspective.
Or something like that.
And it can help us boost our own self esteem.
Because I know that there are things you like about yourself.
I know there are.
If you are really struggling, think
'What would my best friend say'
Or, 'What would my mom say'
Or, 'What would someone who loves me say'
And then you write yourself a love letter.
And share them.
Take pictures.
Tweet them to me.
Share them.
Tag me on instagram
All that jazz.
I like to see all of your lovely work.
Okay, I love you all.
I will see you on Monday.
And I'm going to be in Houston this week in H town.
What.
Visiting my friend Lauren.
I'm so excited.
So if you want to know what I'm up to,
Follow me on instagram katimorton1
Love you all.
Bye!
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