I am at the Trevor project. The world's largest suicide prevention
Organization for LGBTQ youth. Today, I'm gonna find out if I have what it takes to become a lifeline counselor
How do you think I'm gonna do?
I'm not quite sure
I've seen some of your videos and you're not the friendliest.
How fucking dare you?
Should I do this with that dog that's running around real quick? I feel like I'd be better with a dog
I think the dog's in there. I sense the dog is inside there.
This year, I'm hosting Trevor Live
LA? is there a New York one too? Who hosted the New York one?
Hi, I'm Adam Rippon, world-famous figure skater. This is Gus Kenworthy
This is a very serious important topic that we should all be aware of and I'm so honored to be able to
host Trevor Live LA this year and to be able to share this video with all of you.
Off we go into the Trevor office.
Is there a code? *laughter*
We try to provide direct services in any way that a young person might need them
I think we're most famous for the Lifeline because that's what we've been operating for 20 years non-stop.
But essentially we have trained counselors who are available 24/7
E: I have one question. How long have you guys been in a committed relationship because you're totally boyfriend twinning..? Others: Oh my gosh.
So we're gonna like abridge what our lifeline volunteers go through
Then you're gonna come in and interview with me and we'll see if you're a good fit for the training process
We'll start to maybe work through some role plays overall play a call and see how you do
E: I'm gonna nail this roleplay. J: Okay E: which in this context is not usually what I mean when I say that
I'm sorry. I'm such a disgusting person. V.O: We can talk young people through anything from fear of coming out
Confusion around gender identity, bullying in school all the way up to, you know, "I am feeling suicidal right now"
We want to make sure that you know, no matter what the issue is when you're calling you're getting a non-judgmental ear
E: So my goal is to get hired. J: Yeah, your goal is to get picked as a lifeline volunteer
I want you to be like yourself, but I'm hoping that it'll be like.. E: a softer version?
I think I have the perfect outfit in mind. J: Okay?
J:That's a choice!
E: Hello. What is friendlier than your grandma's couch?
J: No, I think that that's actually really accurate. E: Everyone would sit on me.
J: Welcome to your interview. Other: So one of the things we teach people is to be an active listener. E: Mhmm
It's really important that you're really listening to what the young person is telling you.
J: So tell me a time when you supported someone in your life through a crisis.
E: So I have his friend, we'll call her Stacy right? She's seeing this guy
We'll call him Karl. Karl f*ing SUCKS.
I did everything my power to get Stacy out of this toxic relationship. J: And how do you think it went with Stacy?
She married him. J: Okay. E: Yeah.
O: The other thing that we teach people is to not be judgmental, obviously
E: he doesn't even clean his shirts. You see Karl and there's always like a mysterious yellowish stain
O: The other thing is empathy.
Eugene to the dog: I'm empathetic, that's right.
I love dogs.
That's true. But you hate babies
That's true.
How would you define empathy?
In Marvel Comics, when a mutant is an empath they can literally feel people's feelings.
Sure *again* another reference
I know nothing about.
You don't know? So when people talk about the Avengers you exit the chat.
Unless that's one of our callers then I ask them questions.
I'm gonna learn about it.
You're not getting out of it this easy. Name one Avenger.
I think something that's really beautiful about volunteering on the Lifeline is you get sort of second family in the volunteer community
So what if my family fights all the time?
That sounds like it's difficult.
So not my family.. a new family.
Yeah
My parents are divorced. You moved to France. I have two sisters. I've always felt inadequate they're better than me.
I feel like I sometimes I use my queerness to be special and
because they were
Girls they always had to overcome me being the boy and then they beat me at everything. So I was the inadequate boy
You really spent some time just trying to do your best in your family.
Yeah
you know, I'm gonna pivot back to the interview.
We want folks who care very deeply about this work
So in terms of LGBTQ youth related issues
what are some of the topics that you think you feel really comfortable talking about or that you know a lot about?
E: I think I would be able to
Speak personally about being able to overcome..
my own..
self-loathing and my own bouts of depression growing up because I really did hate who I was and I really
Could not imagine that I would ever put on a suit like this
Everything I am now that people know
Was born from that struggle and to get through that struggle was
Probably the most poignant and hardest thing I ever knew in my life and so..
.. I guess..
..to be able to talk to other kids about it is
Probably one of the most important things I could do
J: I think that you can find a lot of empathy in that right. like you understand that depression
you understand that pain. Our callers don't have any space to talk about what they're going through and
Instead we'll ask some open-ended
Questions and we'll really sort of be there to learn about what they're going through and what their experience of everything is. I do want
to share that I think you did okay in the interview. E: Okay, J: And I'm gonna move you forward into the training.
E: I'm excited to take this into the roleplay . J: cool
E: Which always sounds wrong when I say it. Yeah, I'm excited to get into this role play.
See, everything I say sounds dirty
So I'll see you in the role play great. It still sounds weird when I say it.
Okay, and I'm gonna change out of my grandma's couch. Okay? Yeah. All right, cool. Bye love you. I don't. I
don't know yet, but
Uh, Joey? Eugene? I feel like
We're on the voice
if I do well
You're gonna turn your chair around. J: really just gonna be going by my voice and we want to hear that sort of friendliness come through
in your voice . E: *sultry voice* Oh
Welcome, welcome to the call
J: Ask a ton of open-ended questions to learn more about my story
Ok active listening empathy and friendliness! J: Wow. Yeah, that's great
So basically improve upon everything I've sucked out so far J: we can go with that.
You answer the phone. I'm gonna have you say hello Trevor lifeline. This is Eugene. What's going on? You ready? E: Yes
I'm ready to go. J: Alright
*phone rings*
Hello, Trevor lifeline, this is Eugene. What's going on?
J: Hi. E: Hi, how are you doing?
J: Things are really tough right now. I'm just I'm just hoping that that we could talk about it. E: Yeah, of course. What's your name?
My name is Tay. Hey Tay, what do you wanna talk about?
Ok, so I I just started high school
a couple a couple weeks ago and I am
Non-binary and things have just been really really tough in school. E: Oh, no, I'm sorry to hear that
Yeah school can be tough
Yeah, it's just like all the kids are sort of like bullying me and it's it's been really sort of hard
Hard couple of days. Other: suicide is the second leading cause of death among young people
Lesbian gay bisexual youth are more than four times more likely than a straight peers to attempt suicide. Tell me more about
What these kids are saying at school? They just like do this thing where they say a lot of like mean words and then
They just like don't talk to me. E: timeout
Timeout real quick. Yeah, I don't know what to do
Yeah
So it sounds like you got a little stuck. the first thing I want to check in on is, how were you feeling during that?
The idea of talking to someone who's young and lost and doesn't know what to do with their identity and they don't
Know how to deal with it
it just made me feel like I was talking to myself and
I just can't imagine other counselors who probably feel the same way as me and how much training they had to go to to to be
able to get through these calls without
Personally breaking down. It's- it's a- it's a- it's testament to how well this organization is run
J: Well, I think that this person is feeling really lonely
Right and they're feeling really sad and I think sometimes when when adults are trying to help young people
We might jump into this space of wanting to fix it
But it can be really great to just sort of sit with a narrative. Other: trans and non-binary and genderqueer
community is like year over year the amount of contacts we received from people that self identifying in those categories has just like
skyrocketed to where it's almost half of our overall crisis contacts now. J: when I'm in class the kids behind me I can I can hear
Them laughing a lot and I know that they're laughing about me
E: Oh, no, what are they laughing about? J: because I dressed a little different and I look a little different than them
They think it's really funny, but I'm just just trying to be me. Well, there's nothing wrong with being different
J: Yeah
It's nice to hear that
E: Yeah. O: in the news where there might be a bill that's coming forward that could
disproportionately affect a community like a trans military ban
We'll see big spikes in contacts like immediately following. there was the New York Times
article about the restrictive definition of gender
And we saw nearly double crisis call volume at that time Wow
Yeah
J: I feel lonely some days and then I mean some days I'm I'm just like I feel like I'm a badass
So it feels like really complicated. E: That's totally normal.
E: I don't talk about it much but The Trevor Project is something that I wasn't aware of when I was young and
I desperately needed. Even talking to Joey. It's just having someone like that to talk to you would have changed so much
For me and I can only imagine how much it helps
young LGBTQ people today. *curses* Other: some people can get complacent because you get a win here or there, but we are so far from
Full equality and freedom for all LGBTQ people in this in this country that unfortunately Trevor is more needed than ever
E: I think there's a lot of bravery there being your real self. J: So Eugene, I'm gonna I'm gonna stop us here. Yeah
Yeah, I think that you're doing such a good job. I mean the three things that we talked about that you being friendly
Sympathetic and and using some active listening you're doing all of them really
Well. Others: we definitely need volunteers. the easiest ways to go to our website The Trevor Project org on the main page
You will see a big button for volunteering and all the information will be there
No matter where you are in the country
There is a volunteer opportunity. E: The Trevor Project is providing something really valuable
but the end goal is that we progress enough as a society where we don't need to have it in the first place and that
LGBTQ kids could live in a world where they don't feel like they have to call someone to
Be able to talk. So with maybe the full training I could possibly become a
Lifeline counselor. J: Yeah. E: we'll meet back to back again tomorrow?
J: Sure, Eugene we could do that. E: Okay, nice. Hi. We're The Try Guys and we know how important it is for
LGBTQ youth to get the support
They deserve. K: The Trevor Project is always here for you 24/7 if you are considering self-harm or suicide
Reach out to the Trevor Lifeline to speak with one of their trained counselors.
N: Call (1-866-488-7386)
It's confidential and free and they'll always be here to support you
Z: You can also text START to (678678)
or chat with them online at thetrevorproject.org/chat. E: learn more about supporting
LGBTQ youth at www.thetrevorproject.org , together, let's remind them that they are loved, valued and never alone.
E: Bro, we've gotta talk after this about MCU J: I know.. E: Let me get you all up in this Marvel Cinematic Universe
I think you'll like it more than DC. J: I don't know what that is either..
like the- the place?
E: Name a superhero. J: spider-man??
E: You did it!