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- [Narrator] Hey, Psych2Goers, thank you so much
for all the love you've given us over the years.
Your ongoing support has helped us make psychology
and mental health more accessible to everyone.
Now, let's continue.
Have you ever felt guilty for doing things
that made you happy or felt ashamed about something,
but didn't understand why?
While it's important to acknowledge
when you've done something wrong
and apologize for your mistakes,
sometimes you can get stuck feeling guilty over something
that you shouldn't.
The psychological definition of guilt
is a feeling of deserving blame, anger, or shame,
often evoked when we consciously hurt others
with our words, choices, or actions.
Excessively feeling guilty and blaming ourselves
for everything is an unhealthy attitude to have,
and it often leads to feelings of inadequacy,
anxiety, and perfectionism,
and if you're not careful,
it can worsen into patterns
of overcompensating and overthinking
as well as high levels of stress
and chronic emotional distress.
With that said,
here are seven things that you shouldn't feel guilty about.
Number one, not being perfect.
Do you often tear yourself down for making common mistakes
or coming up short sometimes?
As frustrating as it may feel,
the truth is none of us are perfect
and we can't be good at everything we do,
especially not the first few times we try something new.
Albert Einstein put it best when he said
"A person who has never made a mistake
"has never tried anything new."
When you beat yourself up
over every little thing you do wrong,
you initiate negative self-talk and devalue yourself.
Two, asking for help.
Another thing you should never feel bad about
is asking for someone's help,
especially when you really need it
because no matter how hard you might try,
you can't do everything alone.
Nobody has all the answers in life
and nobody has it all figured out.
There's no need to keep struggling in silence
just because you're afraid of seeming like a burden
to those around you.
There is no need to feel guilty
about reaching out to someone
and asking for their help from time to time.
It can be good to remind yourself
that you're never truly alone in your struggle.
Three, being successful.
You should never have to apologize
or feel guilty about achieving your own success.
Accomplishments deserve to be celebrated,
but some people may feel jealous or resentful towards you
for being so successful and try to make you feel bad for it.
Don't give them the satisfaction of getting to you.
You shouldn't have to fail just to make other people
more comfortable around you.
You worked hard to make something of yourself
and you should be proud of it.
You do deserve your success
and don't let other people take that pride away from you.
Four, saying no when you need to.
It's hard not to feel guilty when we can't give someone
what they want from us,
but there comes a time when we have to stand our ground
and assert ourselves.
Saying no to things you can't or don't want to do
is a good practice in setting healthy boundaries
for yourself.
Otherwise, you might end up regretting your actions,
hating yourself for it,
and resenting the other people forever putting you
in that position.
You deserve to be a priority in your own life.
Your wants and needs
shouldn't have to come second to everyone else's.
Number five,
removing yourself from toxic situations or people.
Do you have anyone in your life
who has always come to you with their problems?
Someone who's constantly trying to suck you
into their needless drama?
If you answered yes,
then you've probably wanted to tell this person
you're tired of listening to their dilemmas
and tried to distance yourself
from them at one time or another,
and that's okay.
Getting caught up in another person's drama
can be emotionally exhausting.
So you shouldn't have to apologize
for wanting some peace of mind every once in awhile.
Number six, ending toxic relationships.
It can be difficult to accept that sometimes
the people we love aren't good for us.
But when you're in a relationship with a toxic person,
whether that's a friend, family member, or significant other
who mistreats you and exploits you,
you owe it to yourself to cut ties with them.
People like this are a negative influence in your life
who will only bring you down and rob you
of all of your happiness, motivation, and self-esteem
if you give them the chance.
By choosing to end your relationship with them,
you're protecting your own mental health
and emotional wellbeing,
and number seven, wanting to be happy.
Do you feel guilty for wanting to be happy,
but don't know why?
Do you find it hard to pursue the things
that truly matter to you because of the judgment,
negativity and guilt tripping from the people around you?
Whether it means chasing your dreams, being yourself,
or taking care of your personal needs,
you don't owe anyone an explanation
for how you choose to be happy.
After all, nobody has the right to ask you
to prioritize them over yourself
or sacrifice all your hopes and aspirations for their sake.
So, do you relate to any of these instances?
Have you ever felt guilty
about doing any of the things in the video?
If you are someone who struggles
with a lot of feelings of guilt and shame,
it may be time to stop and ask yourself
why you feel this way.
There is no shame in wanting what's best for yourself,
even if it sometimes comes at the expense
of others' feelings or convenience,
and there are certain things
that you should never have to apologize or feel guilty for.
Please like and share this video if it helped you
and you think it could help someone else, too.
The studies and references used
are listed in the description box below.
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We'll see you next time.