- Hey, guys!
I am Aliza Kelly, and welcome back to your weekly horoscope.
Today, we are going to be looking at the astrology
from Monday, January 27th through Sunday, February 2nd.
That is a tongue twister.
Before we start, you need to subscribe right now.
After things have been super, super bonkers,
this week we are resetting.
This is a week that is all about beginning again,
starting a new cycle.
How are you gonna reset?
That is what we are going to find out today.
I love, love, love, love, love to answer
all of your astrology questions.
Keep asking your questions in the comments,
and I'm gonna keep addressing them.
Today's question comes from Cassandra Wilmot.
How do you find each sign in your birth chart?
As you guys know, I continue to say watch for every sign,
because you have them in your birth chart.
So what does that even mean?
Basically, your chart is a 360 degree wheel.
All 12 signs live around this 360 degree wheel,
so different signs affect different areas of your life.
Certainly, you have your sun sign where that was
at your exact moment of birth occupied as a zodiac sign,
but so did the moon, so did Mercury, so did Venus,
and Mars, and Jupiter, and Pluto, and all of the planets,
and even if you don't have a planet in a sign,
you still have that sign in your birth chart
because it is part of the 360 degree wheel.
So step one is you need to calculate your birth chart,
and that is using your date, time, and location of birth,
and then step two is to look around the wheel
and to see where all of the different symbols
of the signs are, and that is how you can find out
which area of life these different signs are impacting.
Because you have every sign in your birth chart,
that means that certain people
are going to affect you differently.
For instance, if you find that all Tauruses are assholes,
it may be because it illuminates the area of your chart
associated with you being an asshole.
I'm just kidding, kind of.
There's no question that this beginning of 2020
is off to a very intense, maybe a little rocky,
but definitely dramatic start.
Thankfully, we have a little bit of reprieve this week.
The moon, which is the fastest moving celestial body
that we track in astrology, going from Pisces into Aries.
So the moon moves in 28 day orbits,
and much like our emotions, we fluctuate about
every two days through a different emotional world.
We have an opportunity to sort of reorient ourselves
in relation to how we feel things are going.
Take a second to just process all of this
crazy bananas bonkers (bleep)
that is (bleep) up our reality.
As Cassandra helped us discover,
we have all of the different signs within your chart.
So I encourage you to watch all the way through,
but if you wanna rebel against me, it's fine, I'm not mad.
Just use this progress bar to find the sign
that you would like to watch for and watch for it.
At the end, we're gonna do something crazy.
We're gonna do something unprecedented.
We're gonna do superlatives, bitch! (laughs)
We are going to be looking at who is the bitchiest,
who is the bossiest, who is the most lovable,
who is the horniest, and who is the most improved.
So stick around so you could find out which signs
are winning and which signs are not winning.
Aries, we start with you,
and I'm wondering how do you show up?
How are you coming into this space as your best self?
Maybe you have to get a new outfit.
Maybe you need to get a little haircut.
Maybe you just need to change your attitude
because you're walking in with a sour face
and nobody wants it.
In short, Aries, what you need to do this week
is you need to reset to make sure that you are showing up
in the way that you want people to see you.
Okay, Taurus, in order for you to really
get in touch with yourself, you need more money.
I hate to say it, but you need to get some extra cash going.
This week, I want you to strategize on ways
that you can just line your pockets ever so much.
So maybe you're pet-sitting.
Maybe you're watering somebody's plant.
Maybe you're helping someone build their website.
You are putting yourself out there in a position
to have new opportunities come your way
with the intention of just making a little extra money.
When you have a little extra cash,
you're gonna feel more confident,
you're gonna feel more grounded,
and it's going to give you a little bit more clarity
on something that, right now,
feels a little shaky and unstable.
Okay, Gemini, you owe someone an apology.
It's time to give them that apology with no expectations.
This is not an apology so that you
can get an apology back, Gemini.
This is just you literally taking responsibility
for your (bleep) so that you can get it off your chest
and that you can proceed, as per usual, no string attached.
It's okay that you (bleep) up a little bit, everybody does,
but just own it, apologize, and move on,
because we do not want you to dwell on this
for the rest of the week, for the rest of the month.
Be done with it already.
Cancer, wow, what a time it has been for you.
Everybody's talking about how crazy (bleep)
is for Capricorns, but you're out here like,
yo, my life is changing also, and it is,
and I see you, and I get it.
What I would like you to do this week
is I would like for you to buy yourself something
nice and homey for your space.
Maybe it's an air freshener.
Maybe it's a new pillow.
Maybe it is a vacuum, you disgusting, dirty Cancer.
I love you, I'm just kidding, but whatever it is,
you're doing something that is making you feel safe,
and secure, and stable in your space,
something that is making you feel comfortable.
You're a hermit crab, you wanna feel cozy.
You deserve it, reward yourself.
Okay, Leos, I usually don't say this,
but I'm gonna need you to be a little obnoxious this week.
Everyone is gonna be mad at me
for giving you permission to be obnoxious, I know.
You're already sort of bordering on obnoxious to begin with.
I love you, but you need to step outside
of your comfort zone to find even more opportunities
that you can shine and be seen at your job.
Somebody out there is going to recognize the fact
that you're super talented, that you're super ambitious,
so just go for it.
Even if people start giving you the side eye,
don't worry about it, forget them.
Step into yourself and prove that you deserve
the opportunities that you're being presented with.
Virgo, you are an earth sign, you like to be grounded,
you like things to be practical,
and I am going to give you some
very practical advice this week.
I want you to move your body.
You could dance, do yoga, stretch your arms up to the sky
every morning when you wake up.
You do not need to go to a bootcamp,
you just need to get back in touch with your body.
It's been hard for you to manage everything
that's been going on, you're feeling a little out of sorts,
and I promise that if you just tap into yourself,
do that little mind, body, spirit connection
by just getting moving, you're gonna feel so much better,
you're gonna have so much more clarity.
Libra, you are the scales.
One of the things that you do best
is you calibrate for other people.
You are always thinking about
how your actions are affecting another.
This week, I want you to calibrate for yourself.
Make a deal with yourself that you
are going to actually follow through on.
It is a practice in learning
to treat yourself as your partner.
Some call it self-partnering.
I cosign self-partnering, and in fact,
you should cosign for yourself too.
That is part of self-partnering. (laughs)
Scorpio, you're horny!
I don't know what to say.
You're feeling really frisky this week.
I want you to take your phone
and scroll through all of your selfies.
I want you to be horny for yourself this week.
What does that mean?
I'm not sure.
I want you to go to the past, to go into all of the things
that you have done before, and I want you to remember them.
I want you to find some interesting connection
between your past and your future
while avoiding texting your exes
and your booty calls who are not great.
I want you to become enamored with your own sensuality,
enamored with your own spirit.
I don't want you to show up at Chad's house
at three O'clock in the morning.
That is the last thing I want.
Chad, ew.
Okay, Sagittarius, you are feeling inspired,
you are having some sort of a spiritual awakening.
I give you permission to get lost in a Wikipedia black hole.
This week, I want you to dive deep,
deep into your curiosities, into those subreddits
to find for yourself the answers to the things
that you are most curious about.
For instance, how was Justin Bieber discovered?
Will Selena Gomez be okay?
When is Britney Spears going to start a TikTok?
Has she already started a TikTok?
These are among some of the many questions
that you might want to ask yourself
and explore for this very intellectual week ahead.
Capricorn, you are the boss,
as per usual, no questions there.
It is time for you to prove it.
People are slacking, people are not on their (beep)
right now, and they are dropping the ball.
You don't need to wait for them anymore.
You can just do your thing, whether you are working
on your resume, you're working on an application.
Tune out all of the noise, focus on your goals,
and just go for it.
This is your moment.
Aquarius, you are the humanitarian of the zodiac,
and this week, prove it.
I want you to use all of your energy to start taking action,
to either start a fundraiser, or to create a Facebook group.
Does anyone use Facebook anymore?
I don't know.
For the one Aquarius out there who's using Facebook,
make a Facebook group for the thing that you care about.
Whatever platform you use, get people behind what you value.
There is so much bullshit going on in the world right now,
and Aquarius, be the revolutionary that you know you are
by leading that initiative.
Patient Pisces, this week I am excited
for you to help someone get where you are.
What I mean by that simply is that
you are the most compassionate, the most empathetic,
the most sensitive sign of the zodiac.
You can teach somebody else how to be that way.
You can help somebody get more in touch
with their spirituality, trust their gut.
So whether it's a friend, or a colleague, or a lover,
or a family member, whoever it is,
show them how they can create an easy synthesis
between their heart, their mind, and their spirituality.
It is time for superlatives.
First up, let's start with the bitchiest.
Who is the bitchiest this week?
That would have to be Capricorn.
I see you, Capricorn, wedging people out,
taking over the group project, leaving people in the dust.
You need to, you need to.
Sometimes it's good to be a little bit of a bitch,
and, Capricorn, you are proving that that is true.
Next up, we have horniest, and that's Scorpio,
without a doubt.
Scorps, you are just eggplant emojiing all over this week.
As I encourage you to do, yeah, be horny.
Next up, we are going to now be giving the award
for the bossiest, and the award
for bossiest goes to, drum roll, bada bada,
I don't know how to play the drums, it is Aquarius.
You guys are the bossiest this week,
and I don't see bossy as a bad thing.
You are trying to organize people,
you're trying to get people to care
about the world right now, which they (beep) need to.
You being a little bossy to try to get people,
you know, doing the thing, totally fine.
Now we will give the award for most lovable,
and it's Pisces.
You are so sweet, and you're helping people
get in touch with themselves and cry,
and you're holding space for people,
and it's cute, and it's sweet, and it's lovable,
and we appreciate you, so thank you.
And last but not least, we have the most improved.
This is kind of a funny one,
because most improved from what?
It's open-ended, but it's Aries.
You are the most improved, because last week,
you were a real (beep) show.
Now this week, you look great.
Everyone loves you, so you're the most improved, you win.
Thank you guys so much.
This has been the horoscope for the week ahead.
Remember to subscribe, remember to follow me, Aliza Kelly.
You can slide into my Dms to ask me questions.
You can leave your questions here.
Don't be mean to me.
I love you.
See you next week. (laughs)
(gentle playful music)