Scarra: Well, I think I have a good shot of doing well. I don't know about winning, but I think I can take these guys.
No one knows what they're doing and I think I know more than they do.
Somewhat.
Mark: Even if I'm still decent it's important about how I match up against the rest of the competition and they all probably suck b****.
Scarra: Hey guys, what's up we're Offline TV
and today we're going to be doing a One-Two Switch single elimination tournament to decide who the best casual gamer is in the house.
Poke: That's going to be you.
Game: One! Two! Switch!
Eating contest. Oh. Oh no.
Chris: I'm f**ked.
Scarra: I'm going up against Chris, he doesn't play video games at all, except for PUBG,
I'm really not that worried.
Chris: If there's one thing Scarra can beat me at,
it's eating food.
-It teaches you how to do it first. This is just a demonstration video.
-Dude, that guy is creeping me out.
Chris: So you just bite so it senses your bite?
-Yeah, just detach - Chris just read the thing.
Mark: You gotta - you gotta.
Chris: You can't do it either
Yoona: You can't even read the instructions
how can you play the f**king game? You can only use the controller with the camera on it.
You can't both use it, it's one at a time, you f**king--
Chris: Oh, so which one has the camera?
Yoona: The one with the like - gaah!
Fed: I honestly don't think Chris knows, like, what's going on.
Poke: Put it to your mouth, Chris so it can see what it's doing.
Scarra: Wait, it's you.
-Yeah, it's the camera side.
Chris: Wait, it's me?
Yoona: The camera side!
Scarra: Wait, is it me?
-This is going perfectly.
Mark: No, it's Scarra's dude!
Yoona: Okay, Scarra is the retard then, I don't f**king know, am I up there with the remotes? My bad.
-Alright use those great mouth muscles of yours. Keep your head still
Scarra: What are my mouth muscles for?
Mark: Hey dude it can't go until you put it in your mouth and hold still.
-Hold it - hold it in your mouth!
Lily: Still, still, hold it still! You're good.
Yoona: You only had like, four, you suck!
Scarra: Four? -Okay, that's pretty good.
-Give it to Chris.
Lily: He's slowing down! He's slowing down!
Scarra: As soon as you BMed--
Lily: Yeah, as soon as you put that middle finger up, it stopped
Scarra: This is actually so good.
Game: Turn around, 3, 2, 1, go!
Mark: Look, it's so sexist, there's two girls, there's no guy!
Mark: So I actually played Runway during that one night way back, and
I wasn't super great at it. It doesn't really play to my strengths of being very
feminine and swaying your hips when you walk. I'm a pretty manly man, if you can't tell.
Mark: Do I actually have to physically walk?
Lily: Oh my, you're so good at it, what the hell, did you practice?!
I don't have much feminine charm, I think Mark kind of beats me in that area.
Game: Are you ready? 3, 2, 1, go!
*laughing*
Lily: Wait, are we doing this again?
Game: Get center stage and face the crowd!
Game: Pose!
Game: Big finish!
Mark: So I'm pretty sure I killed it--like, I was like Sasha Fierce out there on the runway; I was throwing my hips all over the place..
Mark: You're f**king drunk! Where're you going?
Mark: Ooh, they liked that, you got a heart for that
Scarra: Lily won?
I have no idea how he didn't win that. I guess I'm just that good? Or he sucks?
Uh, the first round I'm up against Fed.
I think Poke is probably
the
easiest matchup for me?
I think he's going to try to edit himself to make himself look
pretty good and shit
I mean I don't have to do that
like, he's just going to get his ass kicked, you know.
Uh, I should stomp him.
Honestly Poke is all talk. Like, he chokes so much.
Game: One, two, three, come on!
Mark: Fed's shredding..
Mark: He looks like he's, like serving ice cream
Yoona: Poke's owning it!
(shrieking in a high pitch) Yeahhhhhhh *glass breaks*
-We got a man down!
Poke: You lost. I guarantee it.
I'm pretty sure the game is not really about doing air guitar stuff it's more about who could just--
--shake it faster--
and uh, I won.
I have a lot of experience.
Honestly, I can't tell you what happened to be honest.
There is a bit of
luck involved in this game, and you know, Poke, today, got lucky.
Lily: I think it's going to be the milk one. Wait, how did I know?
Xell: Oh my--
Scarra: Oh, this is gonna be good.
So uh
the game that me and Yoona got was Milking, and I knew right off the bat I was at a disadvantage
Um, to be honest, I think I'll do pretty good versus Josh. He's a very short Asian man and I am a very tall
handsome
uh, Latino Mexican, that will crush him.
Game: Face each other, and get ready
-Wait, what? -Face each other get ready.
Game: Ready?
Xell: Is it just as fast as you can?
Yoona: No, there's a rhythm.
Game: Milk!
-You're not trying to kill the cow.
Game: Look at your hands as you milk!
Mark: You got some real thick streams, Yoona
Mark: That's a great flow
Yoona: Oh my god, he just sprayed!
Yoona: Oh my god
Mark: You got eight cups of--
*laughing*
Yoona: Oh my f**king god! I just turned around and it went *pshhh*
So, we did the milk game, and apparently I'm a monster at it, because, I mean..
I even take that cow to dinner and
We won. I came to win.
The f--
I don't know what Yoona does, but he's really good at it
It was like getting all over the screen, like, it was a mess. I had--I had no chance
Yes, dude. I read fantasy novels for a living, I play League of Legends; dude, I got this.
Like, this is as close to
katana catching as I'm going to get.
I'm really happy I got Swordfight, because it reminds me of one of my favorite animes, which is Sword Art Online.
I really like Sword Art Online.
Kirito's my favorite character.
Game: Keep your guard. Cross swords.
- (in an accent) Gingerly touch your tips
Game: Fight!
-Look each other in the eye. -As you touch your tips.
-Aren't you guys fighting? -I think you guys are supposed to be fighting.
-You're just trying to kill each other!
-Oh! -Ooh! Lily's got the lead! -Oh!
-It's over, it's over... -Wait! Oh! -The comeback!
-No way! Lily go! -Oh, you blocked it!
-Lily kill him! You have one heart!
-Stab him in the throat! -Backstab him like you usually do
I think it got really exciting near the end, because I think I did this, like, really cool block, and I attacked him, and
he died
And his ego
First of all, we didn't even know when it started.
It got really close, down to the wire, one to one and then
She just took it at the very end
Poke: (western voice) It's hiiigh noon
-Hey Poke, say that again?
Poke: It's--it's hiiigh--
Nah, I'm kinda scared, I love Yoona
I don't want to hurt him
Going against Poke, my brother
You know, sometimes, you gotta kill your brother.
-This is how you destroy your friends.
Game: Lower your guns with the muzzle facing the ground.
Game: Steady...steady...
Game: Lower your guns with the muzzle--
What?! What! *laughing*
Game: Steady...steady...
Game: Fury!
Game: Flower!
Yoona: That's how it ends? You hit me in the chest?
So..the game said "Flower" and
I'm pretty sure I heard "Fire" and
I messed up. it sucks. it really
It was pretty easy to win when he shot me in the chest at the word "Flower"
Don't know how that's "Fire", but good shit
Yoona: Wait, this is like the jacking off one
Yoona: Did you see what I did to that cow?
Yeah, he's got really good techniques
I'm like, kind of scared to see what the final game will be
Finally, I'm against Lily in the finals
My, my idol, my favorite Youtuber, she just hit 1 million subscribers, congratulations
But I'm gonna have to take her down.
-Let's go Yoona! -Lily!
Scarra: It's like running. Running in place.
Game: On your marks.
Scarra: Pretend you're on the beach. -Face each other and get ready to run!
-Oh, my god
Scarra: Look at her in the eyes
Scarra: Okay, now-- Mark: Now you're ready.
Game: Get set--
Poke: Tell her you love her
Yoona: I love your content Lily
Game: *whistle blows*
-Look each other in the eye!
Yoona: What even is this?
What
Scarra: You know, it sucks to suck
I mean, she's just a better player.
I don't even care. It's just a fucking game like, we're just fucking around.
I think what contributed to my win
I guess, it's not really about the speed, but the rhythm
you're going at, and if you can fini--
It's a, really weird motion, Lily seemed very good at it
I don't know what I was doing, I was shaking my hand really really really hard and hoping for the best, and I ended up winning
So, there's that
Congratulations, Lily, you won.
*applause*
Hey guys, thank you so much for watching. Let us know what game you want to see us play next, and we'll see you next time.
Xell: Bye! Penis Lily: What?