- Today we try the best sliced bread since sliced bread.
- Let's talk about that.
(quirky upbeat music)
Good mythical morning.
- Today we're gonna be examining bread in varying forms.
What's your favorite form of bread?
(Rhett chuckles)
- The bowl, man.
Bread bowl.
- Oh, the bowl?
- Bread can take the form of a bowl.
That's my favorite.
- I think right now for me it's Toaster Strudel.
Does that count?
- That's not a bread, that's a pastry.
- Butter biscuit boy, I'll go with that.
- Okay. - All right,
today we're gonna be competing
to see who can tell the difference
between generic brand bread products
and big corporate bread.
It's time for Knock-Off Knockout: Bread Edition.
- All right, we're gonna presented with several rounds
of specific bread products.
They're not always round though.
Get it?
Rounds, but some of them may be round,
but I don't know, haven't seen the bread yet.
Some of them might be square.
- Right.
- Some of them could be a triangle. That's a cracker.
Okay, one of them's gonna be
from a big brand name that everybody knows.
The other are gonna be from non-name brand generic versions.
- We're gonna be competing to try to
correctly identify which one is the name brand bread
and the winner gets a very real and very big gold medal.
(bell dings)
- Okay, as you can see these are hotdog buns.
- Mm-hm.
- One of these is from Ballpark.
Ballpark.
- The maker of the Ballpark frank?
- I'm not familiar with their buns
I'm more familiar with their wieners.
- I'm going for the middle here.
- I'm going for smell and slight taste on the end.
- Oh, that's a good one.
Now this one's darker.
Let's see if it's as tasty.
Much more airy and bland.
That first one's got a richness to it.
- Almost a butteriness.
- Yeah, this one is leaving a lot be desired.
Now this one looks fancy.
- Huh, this feels a little ...
Oh, it's super soft.
- Mm-hm, it's got a good scent.
- [Rhett] That's a good hot dog bun.
- [Link] There's more bread here.
- That's doughy.
That becomes doughy in your mouth in a good way.
- Lot of girth.
- How much bread are we gonna eat today?
- I definitely still liking the first one,
but this third one is giving a run for its money.
Oh, this one ...
- This is nice as well.
- This one's got some softness.
Mm.
- Huh.
- This is almost like potato bread, this first one.
It's yellower.
Look at the yellow-ness.
Can you tell that this one's more yeller?
- Okay, I think I know.
- [Stevie] You ready to guess? - Ballpark, huh?
- [Stevie] Here we go, in--
- Oh, look, mine says Sara Link.
- Mine says Orarhett.
- Okay, all right, I'm ready.
- [Stevie] Three, two, one.
- Oh gosh, I thought it was this one, and then ...
(Link groaning)
I'm gonna stick to my guns.
That's definitely the tastiest one, wouldn't you agree?
- I actually thought that ...
Which one was super doughy?
This one? - This one.
- [Steve] Three.
- I thought that one was the best one.
- [Stevie] The Ballpark hotdog bun is on plate number one.
- Yes! (bell dings)
- Wow, wow.
- [Stevie] The others are First Street from Smart & Final,
365 from Whole Foods.
- Very good. - It was a good one.
- [Stevie] And Market Pantry from Target.
- Meh.
(energetic music)
Breakfast is the most important meal of the deal
and that sentence is in English.
- Ha!
- You know what else is in English and breakfast?
- I assume the English muffin
'cause that's what I'm seeing before me.
- English muffins.
All right, we got to pick out the iconic
Thomas's English muffin. - Ah yes, the Thomas.
- Now, I'm gonna give them a nice rub.
Let's just rub 'em down, okay?
Okay, so there's that one.
Pretty rough.
It's pretty rough too.
- You're rubbing every ...
- I was rubbing the ones I'm gonna eat.
- How are gonna know which ones you rubbed?
You got to remember all of it.
- I rubbed it, I rubbed it, I rubbed it.
Now, this one has no sandpaper feel to it.
This one's really sandy.
That one's sandy.
This one right here's not even sandy.
- If you saw an English muffin next to an American muffin
what would you think?
- One sucks and the other one's dessert.
- [Rhett] It's like, "They're not having
"a lot of fun in England." - No.
- They're just mushing it down.
- [Link] Nothing to brag about there.
- [Rhett] That is dry.
I think they're all gonna be dry though.
- No, this one's soft.
- First of all, this one's pre-cut.
Is Thomas pre-cut?
- I think he deals in both.
- This is an English muffin
that's been de-Englishafied a little bit.
- Oh, you think that's what Thomas is about?
- I don't know.
- Now, here's the one that's not sandpapery.
What about the crannies, you know?
I can see that there's some nooks and crannies
if you were to open this one.
- [Rhett] That's got a good smell.
That's moist on the inside.
- [Link] Mm-hm.
That's a nice one.
- I want to just put my face in it.
- Put your face in.
- [Rhett] Which one did you rub?
- This one.
The one with my rub marks on it.
- This one's almost like a donut without a hole.
- [Link] That's very dense.
- Pretty presentation here.
- I don't think I ever ate an English muffin
until my sophomore year in college.
- Okay, I think I know which one it is.
- Oh, man. - Okay.
- I'm trying to figure out which one I like the most.
Definitely like this one the most.
Okay, I'm ready. - Three,
two, one.
- Wa-bam.
Oh, we agree.
You don't want to hedge your bets since I'm in the lead?
- Nope, I'm like 94% sure that's a Thomas muffin.
- Yeah, I mean, that's nice, but there's no sandiness.
- [Stevie] The Thomas English muffins are on plate number
three.
- Yes. - Oh!
- [Stevie] The others are Trader Joe's
classic English muffins,
Signature Select from Safeway and Vons, and--
- Safeway got something going on.
Nice and pillowy.
- [Stevie] Great Value from Walmart.
- I got to say, Thomas though
is significantly better than all of them.
(energetic music)
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- All right, we have slices bread in front of us
and one of them is Wonder Bread.
- Wonder which?
This one is darker.
- Do you want to rub this one?
- I'll just ...
- This is a perfect square.
Is Wonder Bread a perfect square?
- I thought it was a little taller.
And look at how dark it is up there.
A lot of darkness on top.
- Maybe a little bit burnt almost.
- It was soft.
This one's also soft.
Very rounded.
This is more of a classic silhouette.
- Did your mom do white bread
or did your mom make you do wheat bread
because she thought it was healthier?
- We didn't have those types of discussions in my home.
- [Rhett] So you just had white bread?
- Oh yeah.
- We had white bread most of the time.
- And I was pretty happy.
That's a pretty thick slice too.
It's a little thicker than that one.
Now this one's squarer again.
It's got the little butt crack on top here.
This one's not impressing me.
Yeah.
And now for number four,
we're back to the number two.
I mean, how do they do that?
How do they make that happen?
Do they give it a little poosh at some point in the process?
- They tie it down with a little piece of rope.
- Now, I like the silhouette.
The taste of this one ...
- Not incredible.
- Actually not good at all.
All right, okay.
- I think I know which one is Wonder Bread.
- Okay. - Yeah.
To me, there's one that is heads above the rest
in terms of taste.
- [Stevie] Three, two, one.
- And it's got to be two.
Oh, no, you're not.
There's no way, Rhett.
- [Stevie] The Wonder Bread is in plate number two.
(Rhett sighs) (bell dings)
- That's right, man.
My momma raised me right. - I didn't have it growing up.
I thought it would be whiter.
- Oh, whiter? - Yeah.
- [Stevie] The others contained Great Value from Walmart,
First Street from Smart & Final,
and Value Corner from Safeway and Vons.
- Value Corner? - Value Corner.
I'm falling behind.
I'm falling into the value corner.
- Yeah you are.
(energetic music)
There was a new trend this year,
a lot of people making their own sourdough at home.
- It's not confusing.
People are stuck at home, man,
they got to do something.
Might a well bake bread.
- Your mom used to make bread.
- Everybody's mom used to make bread.
- Was it sourdough bread?
- All the moms--
- It was so good.
- Who's got the starter?
I got to get the starter from Gina.
- All right, so we're looking for the bo-dan, bow-dan?
- I would not be - Boudin?
- Familiar with Boudin.
- Sourdough.
Smells soury.
- [Rhett] So I guess I'm just gonna have to go with
which one seems the most French.
- [Link] Thick.
- Yeah, sourdough's a good bread.
- If you really think about it, this is very sour.
- [Rhett] I really thought about it.
- [Link] What is the type that your mom made?
- Sourdough bread.
- Wasn't like this.
- You didn't have it.
- [Link] I did have it.
It was really good.
It was very soft.
- You had bad tastes as a kid.
- I've never realized how sour--
- What'd you do to your starter, Diane?
What did you do to your starter to make it start so good?
- [Link] This is so sour.
- [Rhett] Sour the better-er.
Now, this is holey.
- The first two tasted exactly the same.
- Yeah, look at the holes in this puppy.
- This is like straight up off a French street,
like you're putting this out
from underneath the woman's arm.
Got a little piece of hair on it.
And you don't mind, you just take it home and eat it.
- This one seems the most authentic.
- I've always wanted to ride a bicycle around Paris
with a baguette under my arm.
Will you make that dream come true?
- How am I gonna make that dream come true?
Buy you a bicycle, and a baguette, and a plane ticket?
- My birthday's coming up in October.
- I'll gladly send you to another country.
You'd probably get beat up over there.
They don't beat up anyway, they'd probably beat you.
- But I want to be naked
on a bicycle. - Yeah, exactly,
that's why they'd beat you up.
- You know what? I got a baguette under each arm.
- [Link] This one's the softest one.
- Now, what is Boudin trying to do?
This one's less soury.
- I don't know what Boudin's trying to do.
- Okay, ready.
- [Stevie] Three, two, one.
- Oh, man, that's what I wanted to do.
That's what I also wanted to do,
because it looks totally legit, right?
- Okay, I'll go on the record,
that's what I wanted to guess
but I can't win if I guess that because
I can only tie as we speak anyway.
- Do your worst, you Parisian naked biker.
- All right, I'm gonna go with it's the least interesting.
- Oh, shoot, really?
- 'Cause why not?
- I would have guessed this one as the second.
- [Stevie] Boudin is on plate number one.
(Rhett laughs) (bell dings)
- Lucky duck. - Seriously?
You are a lucky duck.
- [Stevie] The others contain Trader Joe's
sourdough sandwich bread, 365 from Whole Foods,
and Signature Select from Safeway and Vons.
- 365 is fancy, y'all.
(energetic music)
You know, a lot of New Yorkers will argue
that you shouldn't just sell bagels in a bag,
but guess who doesn't give a crap
about your New York bagels?
- You. - Sara Lee.
- Oh.
- Which one of these bagels is from Sara Lee, Link?
- [Link] Not bad.
- This is just a uniform ...
This is super homogenous.
There's no shine to it.
They don't butter it at all, you know what I'm saying?
- Yep, see, that one's got a line of shine.
All the other ones have shine.
This is a matte finish bagel.
- Or you coat it in egg to get the shine, right Josh?
- [Voice] No.
- Okay.
(people laughing off camera)
- [Link] This one looks like a buttered bagel.
- What do you coat it in?
- [Voice] It's typically boiled in a honey syrup
and then baked, and that's what gives it the shine.
- Honey syrup, really?
- That's the answer I was looking for.
- Boiled in a honey syrup?
- And the longer you boil, the shinier the bagel.
- [Voice] Sure, why not?
- [Link] Because he's making it up, that's why not.
- I like a bagel, but I don't like a plain bagel.
I don't like a plain bagel with nothing on it.
- Yeah.
- This is like ... - Torture.
- This would be good if you've been camping
for like two days.
- Solitary confinement maybe.
- [Stevie] I'd argue that all of those bagels
don't even taste like bagels.
- Oh, really?
- [Stevie] I don't know,
I feel like you got to get a really solid toast on them.
- What are you, a New Yorker?
- [Stevie] Eh, close.
- [Rhett] This is a shiny sucker, man.
They boiled the crap out of this thing.
- I'm not discerning any difference in taste.
- Me neither, man.
- Just put me back in a hole for another day.
- I got to guess.
I got to Sara Lee guess.
- This is tough, y'all.
I mean, there's no clear winner in terms of taste,
so I think we're learning just go with the generic crap.
- [Stevie] Three, two, one.
- Don't do it.
Man, that was what I was gonna guess!
- Well, you went like this.
- [Stevie] We also can't see your thing because it's ...
Yep.
- All right, well, maybe I'll get lucky again.
It was between these two,
but this one was the one that I thought was Sara Lee.
- You know what?
- Hold on, no, no, no, don't change it.
Don't change it. - I'm fine with changing it.
You want to change it?
- And then I'm gonna change to that one.
Nope, and then I'm gonna change back to this one.
Okay.
- [Stevie] The Sara Lee-
- Does that make you feel better?
I'm gonna beat you fair and square.
- Well, no, because so far my being forced
to guess wrong has ended up making me right,
so now I'm nervous.
- [Stevie] The Sara Lee bagels are on plate number
three.
(Rhett groans) (Link laughs)
- Dang it!
- Yeah!
- Dang it, man.
- [Stevie] The other bagels are from
Great Value from Walmart,
Signature Select from Safeway and Vons,
and 365 from Whole Foods.
- 365 is working real hard making things shiny.
- What is this?
- Gold Medal.
- Okay.
Literally just a bag of flour.
- Somebody call Jen.
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- You know what time it is.
- Hi, I'm Jeff. - And I'm Lydia.
- We are from Maine. - And we just got back
from our quarantine honeymoon.
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Click the top link to watch us find out
which bread is best to smoosh your face into
in Good Mythical More.
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is gonna land.
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